I'm trying really hard to become more Selfish. This is my weak area.  Selflessness looks good on paper, even in practice, however I want to be able to play this game right. I want to modulate my selflessness and a add some selfishness to the mix so I'm not too unhinged.  Give me some tips and suggestions on how to become more Selfish.  I lack self preservation instinct or at least there's something fundamentally screwed with my self preservation compass. I always throw away my own good and become the sacrificial lamb in every situation. I lack being selfish. This is not a boundary issue. It's like I have to force myself to be Selfish in every situation and my mind usually goes mute on this. I start acting like a mule and become too sacrificial. I have realised it's getting detrimental to my well being. I need to act selfish or die trying.  It's good to be empathetic but I want to be selfish like other people around me. I struggle thinking selfishly because the strategy or technique/value system is missing.  I want to hone my opportunistic side for better survival.  I know that this sounds a bit contradictory especially after I began my spiritual path. However midway on this spiritual path, I realised that if I don't act selfishly there is a foreseeable danger to my life. That won't go according to plan.  So the damage control mode was to focus back on survival.  I have now understood that my spiritual job involves to not only grow a building but also a fortress at the same time or else the building is gone and I'm finished. So selfishness has to be an important part of this equation in the sense of self preservation. This is tough Because I never properly learned or integrated skills of survival and selfishness. I always operated from a paradigm of giving giving and giving more, but never understood how to grab instead of "give." Now I'm struggling to grab for myself.  If you have always been selfless the majority of your life, becoming selfish will feel like learning Greek and vice versa, that is if you mostly been selfish, then suddenly becoming selfless becomes an arduous task. I know this sounds like a foolish question but whatever, at this stage I need to save myself. That's my priority.   Any practical tips and exercises please. I don't need your lecture/spiritual platitude.