electroBeam

Any Way Of Reducing The Existential Fear From Meditation?

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the meditation practice I follows involves me looking at myself in the mirror(gazing meditation) and then asking myself "who is looking at this person in the mirror"

anyway this meditation technique is really really really effective!

"I" start to forget who the person is in the mirror within 5 minutes, and the discovery of who is aware of the experience becomes very apparent very soon.

But this meditation techniques is very very scary. Forgetting who the person is in the mirror/realizing its not you, and then realizing that the 'thing' who is aware of experience is not real, is soooo scary. Its like combining 1000 horror movies into 1.

Is there any way of alleviating this fear? I've tried reassuring myself that "don't worry, everything will be ok. Enlightenment is beautiful, this is a good thing" but then eventually the realization occurs that experience is just talking to itself when I try and say these things to myself, and those reassuring sentences loose meaning.

 

This is a very uncomfortable experience to have. Any way of making it less daunting?

Edited by electroBeam

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1 hour ago, electroBeam said:

But this meditation techniques is very very scary. Forgetting who the person is in the mirror/realizing its not you, and then realizing that the 'thing' who is aware of experience is not real, is soooo scary. Its like combining 1000 horror movies into 1.

Is there any way of alleviating this fear?

Remember that these are your own faces.

Now the subconscious mind is beginning to explode these faces. these masks are yours! Sometimes even a face that belongs to your past life may come in. Many faces will be coming and going constantly. After few you will not be able to remember which is your face. Your own face, you will not be able to remember, because you have seen so many faces coming and going. If you continue anyway, then after few weeks the strangest thing happens. Suddenly there is no face in the mirror. The mirror is vacant. You are staring into emptiness. There is no face at all.

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I remember this when on 3 occasions in my life 2 in lucid/astral state and one in a high messy night. The key is to face it.

You can only see light once you have faced and embraced the darkness. Once you can reside in the darkness comfortably the darkness transcends into light, it has no option and meaning to remain otherwise.


B R E A T H E

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4 hours ago, electroBeam said:

the meditation practice I follows involves me looking at myself in the mirror(gazing meditation) and then asking myself "who is looking at this person in the mirror"

anyway this meditation technique is really really really effective!

"I" start to forget who the person is in the mirror within 5 minutes, and the discovery of who is aware of the experience becomes very apparent very soon.

But this meditation techniques is very very scary. Forgetting who the person is in the mirror/realizing its not you, and then realizing that the 'thing' who is aware of experience is not real, is soooo scary. Its like combining 1000 horror movies into 1.

Is there any way of alleviating this fear? I've tried reassuring myself that "don't worry, everything will be ok. Enlightenment is beautiful, this is a good thing" but then eventually the realization occurs that experience is just talking to itself when I try and say these things to myself, and those reassuring sentences loose meaning.

 

This is a very uncomfortable experience to have. Any way of making it less daunting?

I can't answer you now, but quote me in a month and maybe I could (if any of the fine sir here couldn't).


God is love

Whoever lives in love lives in God

And God in them

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@Prabhaker Ive also noticed that when i go out into the street, people ive never seen before in this life seem very familiar. Even places ive never seen before seem very familiar. Thats creepy but not that scary.

Ive tasted the thing you wrote about in your last sentence. That's the part I'm talking about. Seeing no one in the mirror, being completely unfamiliar eith the person in the mirror, as if youve never seen yourself before, as if that thing in the mirror isnt even a person but just empty space (even more empty than a rock) is toooo much for me. I stop the practice there. And i dont know how to get over that hurdle. 

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@FirstglimpseOMG please explain what u mean haha.

If it didn't hurt, I would keep going. If I keep going.... it feels like i'll go into a place I've never been before, as alien as a parallel universe, without me being in it. A place without a worldview, a very empty place. But I'm not sure because haven't tried it yet. Going to this unknown place is also very scary too.

Edited by electroBeam

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@Martin123 I suppose because Leo and Osho always talks about how spirituality will woop you in the ass, so I guess tolerating it is the right decision to make.

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@electroBeam Yeah I tbh I really frown uppon teachings that imply self-torture. You can, if you have a really really solid foundation of self-love and self-trust. Otherwise you're literally drowning yourself on purpose whilst still figuring out how to swim.


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@electroBeam Well, not to be light about it, but I bet wherever you go, you'll be back, intact. I might have to try this mirror work.. I want more mysticism and scary adventure and less Youtube guru fixation.  

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2 hours ago, electroBeam said:

 I stop the practice there. 

This is the moment! Close your eyes and encounter the unconscious. When there is no face in the mirror, just close the eyes. This is the most significant moment: close the eyes, look inside, and you will face the unconscious. You will be naked, completely naked - as you are; all deceptions will fall.

This is your reality, but society has created so many layers in order that you will not be aware of it.

And once you know yourself in your nakedness, your total nakedness, you will begin to be a different person. Then you cannot deceive yourself; now you know what you are.

Unless you know what you are you can never be transformed. Only this naked reality can be transformed. And, really, just the will to transform it will effect the transformation.

As you are, you cannot transform yourself. You can change one false face to another false face -  but these are not really transformations.

Transformation means becoming that which you really are.

The moment you face the unconscious, encounter the unconscious, you are face to face with your reality, with your authentic being. The false societal being is not there: your name is not there, your form is not there, your face is not there. Only the naked reality of your nature is there, and with this naked reality transformation is possible.

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@FirstglimpseOMG just a few pointers:

- go into a really quiet room with a mirror, devoid of the world and distraction(even beautiful scenery distractions).

- stare at yourself in the eyes.

- Start off by detaching yourself from the world: tell yourself you don't want anything from your sensations, that discomfort feeling? Its beautiful you don't want to change it. That beautiful light breeze in the room? You don't want anything from it, you are fine with it leaving. 

- eventually when the mind is super quiet, as yourself who that thing in the mirror is. If you're like me, you'll start to hallucinate, and your face in the mirror will start changing shape and your eyes will seem to move around, it will seem like another entity/another person staring at you, maybe even wanting to kill you, maybe even a ghost/a hollow thing, maybe youre already dead, and other really creepy shit. 

- then that face will start to look foreign, like you have never seen it before(existential terror = over 9000).

- then if your brave enough, ask yourself, "who is aware/who is staring at this foreign face?" Don't get too caught up in the ideas that the sentence/question will produce, visualize yourself in the world staring at a mirror, really feel like its real. 

- then really go meta on that thing staring at that foreign face which was once yours, but now you have no idea who owns it. It seems empty and hollow, like it never existed.

IDK what happens next because im too scared, but I'm going to take a leaf of Prabhaker's advice, and have the balls to do it. 

Goodluck, you'll need it.

EDIT: btw I know you're excited to try this, but if done correctly, this isn't going to be pleasant. 

Edited by electroBeam

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Dude, I have a dysfunctional ex-wife, nothing scares me any more.

Thank you for sharing though, I'm going to get into it. I did have a weird experience last week after a shower. When I was standing well to the side of the mirror I had to extend and reach for the towel, so only my forearm and hand appeared in the mirror out of nowhere, no face or familiar image to attach to a 'me'. Instantly I was sort of startled and amused at the same time; "Who the hell's arm is that?"

I'll practice and return with tales of great adventure maybe, thanks again. ;)

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13 hours ago, electroBeam said:

the meditation practice I follows involves me looking at myself in the mirror(gazing meditation) and then asking myself "who is looking at this person in the mirror"

anyway this meditation technique is really really really effective!

"I" start to forget who the person is in the mirror within 5 minutes, and the discovery of who is aware of the experience becomes very apparent very soon.

But this meditation techniques is very very scary. Forgetting who the person is in the mirror/realizing its not you, and then realizing that the 'thing' who is aware of experience is not real, is soooo scary. Its like combining 1000 horror movies into 1.

Is there any way of alleviating this fear? I've tried reassuring myself that "don't worry, everything will be ok. Enlightenment is beautiful, this is a good thing" but then eventually the realization occurs that experience is just talking to itself when I try and say these things to myself, and those reassuring sentences loose meaning.

 

This is a very uncomfortable experience to have. Any way of making it less daunting?

I'll a little late adding to your post but....holy shit... I have done this several times and it feels great to hear someone having the same experience. First, I have to say, this particular post - one has either done this or not. It is not like other things. I've done long meditations, psychedelics, etc. This is not that at all. It's unique to itself. I have no advice for you, but you describe it exactly as I have experienced it. I'm very curious to hear back from you if you go further. I don't experience resistant thoughts anymore at all, I can non-think at will from twenty some years of meditation, I love boxing - the rougher the better, I meditate in the middle of the woods, in the middle of the night -- -- -- but I did the mirror thing for 5-10 minutes - and it's scared the fuck outta me!     It's sort of like around 6 or 7 minutes you've just forced away or something...right? Saying it's fear is in the ballpark but it's something more than just fear. I have only experienced that from the mirror. 

PEOPLES - if you have not done this, alone, for 5-10 minutes, please please do it and comment back on your experience. I know this may sound silly, but I don't think a mirror is like other 'stuff'. Something is going on with mirrors and our'self' or 'higher self' or something. Is there a breakthrough, maybe if someone can get though like 30 minutes??? Ultimately, I have the same question as you - it's like some force is penetrating every fiber of your being, but is there a breakthrough to be had?

Edited by Nahm

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@Nahm I know someone who took NN-DMT and then stared at himself in the mirror questioning his existence. He got PTSD xDxD. This is where my inspiration comes from to do this.

I have a feeling that @Prabhaker has gone all the way.  

@FirstglimpseOMG That creepy feeling you got in the shower is a tiny taste of what its like. BUT What if you also forgot who you were completely? And that forearm was attached to a ghost that was once you, but you're now dead?  Or maybe you thought that arm was yours, but then you realize it never was yours, and that you're actually dead like what happen to the guy in sixth sense, or fight club? ooooooooo 

Edited by electroBeam

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@electroBeam Aren't you bored of being scared yet?

How long you gonna play these silly games?

Get enlightened and get on with your life already! ...rather than furiously jerking off to yourself in the mirror.

You're like the groundhog who surfaced to jerk off to himself, but mid-way through saw his own shadow, got scared, hid back in his little dank hole, only to repeat the whole thing the next day, bragging about it to his groundhog friends.

;)


You are God. You are Truth. You are Love. You are Infinity.

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18 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

@electroBeam Aren't you bored of being scared yet?

How long you gonna play these silly games?

Get enlightened and get on with your life already! ...rather than furiously jerking off to yourself in the mirror.

You're like the groundhog who surfaced to jerk off to himself, but mid-way through saw his own shadow, got scared, hid back in his little dank hole, only to repeat the whole thing the next day, bragging about it to his groundhog friends.

;)

 

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Reposted my mistake... Or was it.  And yes that one goes in the book of Leo. I smell a new video.

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