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Survey for men and women here

What attracts men and women sexually    21 members have voted

  1. 1. As a man, what attracts you the most in a woman (sexually )?

    • Her face
      9
    • Her hair
      0
    • Her breasts
      2
    • Her butt
      5
    • Her voice
      3
    • Other
      2
  2. 2. As a woman ,what attracts you the most in a man (sexually)?

    • His face
      0
    • His beard
      0
    • His haircut
      1
    • His muscles
      1
    • His penis
      2
    • Other.
      17

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36 posts in this topic

32 minutes ago, integral said:

 

Its possibly high serotonin/cortisol, but I have no idea why "narcissistic and authoritarianism" is included in this conversation. ???

You explained that a woman's body does not excite you that much and that you are above all interested in proof that you manage to give her pleasure and that you are important.
It is literally narcissism and yes it is within this energy that authoritarianism takes root.
Whether it's conservative or progressive authoritarianism, it doesn't matter, taking pleasure in being seen as one who "does well" is the direct projection of this sexuality.

Edited by Schizophonia

If you dont understand, you're not twisted enough.

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@Schizophonia That's reasonable, I'm sure I'm experiencing that as my gut health is not good, but I'm eating balanced, meat, eggs, milk, vegetables. With out animal products my sex drive dumps and its hard to get or keep an erection.

I think there is a difference between porn/fantasizing and real sex in this case. For watching porn the frame of mind is her features and dominating her that turns me on but in real life having sex with the same woman over and over again it depends on her energy, her needs and the intimacy created from it. The last gf I had wanted to be "fucked" and I got tired of that frame, my current one wants more closer intimacy and its 100x more interesting.

Ye im sure if my body was healthier id want more animal sex, but I cant be sure as of right now im really board of that kind of sex. 

21 minutes ago, Schizophonia said:

dimension, I instinctively fantasized about ugly or Asian women because I imagined that it was easier for them to have fun with them. Me.
On the contrary, when I did a carnivorous diet then rather "ray peat style" I became much more stable and focused on work, but above all, I had one erection per day (very strong) and for the first time I instinctively took quality porn videos with very pretty girls.
Just my two cents.

I totally get the ugly/pretty girl thing, I've had similar experiences. 


How is this post just me acting out my ego in the usual ways? Is this post just me venting and justifying my selfishness? Are the things you are posting in alignment with principles of higher consciousness and higher stages of ego development? Are you acting in a mature or immature way? Are you being selfish or selfless in your communication? Are you acting like a monkey or like a God-like being?

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33 minutes ago, Schizophonia said:

You explained that a woman's body does not excite you that much and that you are above all interested in proof that you manage to give her pleasure and that you are important.
It is literally narcissism and yes it is within this energy that authoritarianism takes root.
Whether it's conservative or progressive authoritarianism, it doesn't matter, taking pleasure in being seen as one who "does well" is the direct projection of this sexuality.

Well can you describe non-narcissistic sex? ?

Edited by integral

How is this post just me acting out my ego in the usual ways? Is this post just me venting and justifying my selfishness? Are the things you are posting in alignment with principles of higher consciousness and higher stages of ego development? Are you acting in a mature or immature way? Are you being selfish or selfless in your communication? Are you acting like a monkey or like a God-like being?

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@integral so you're basically asexual now?

May I ask you how old are you?  Because age does play a role in sexuality.

I didn't know that there was a name for your "condition"..that sex was a low (the lowest??) priority and your sex drive is close to zero?


"life is not a problem to be solved ..its a mystery to be lived "

-Osho

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5 minutes ago, Someone here said:

@integral so you're basically asexual now?

May I ask you how old are you?  Because age does play a role in sexuality.

I didn't know that there was a name for your "condition"..that sex was a low (the lowest??) priority and your sex drive is close to zero?

No lol my sex drive is very high, 34. There is a misunderstanding, her emotions are more attractive then her body. 

Edited by integral

How is this post just me acting out my ego in the usual ways? Is this post just me venting and justifying my selfishness? Are the things you are posting in alignment with principles of higher consciousness and higher stages of ego development? Are you acting in a mature or immature way? Are you being selfish or selfless in your communication? Are you acting like a monkey or like a God-like being?

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1 minute ago, integral said:

No lol my sex drive is very high. There is a misunderstanding, her emotions are more attractive then her body. 

1). But you said body parts don't turn you on anymore and it's difficult for you to get and maintain an erection. 

2)you didn't answer your age. It's totally up to you.  I ain't gonna ask it again if you don't feel comfy telling it .

3)so looks don't matter to you?  If you see a super hot chick like Kate Upton..it doesn't get your ding dong going ?

4) every man  LOVES to look at women and then ultimately do more than look ?.

as human beings we're innate to use our senses Taste,smell,feel(touch)…How do you think you got to be here on this Earth?

Specifically 2 people who actually happened to be your 2 parents started looking at each other too and then one day they did a little bit more than look and boom you were created.xD 


"life is not a problem to be solved ..its a mystery to be lived "

-Osho

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1 minute ago, Someone here said:

1). But you said body parts don't turn you on anymore and it's difficult for you to get and maintain an erection. 

It is difficult if she does not want to have sex with me? I must be a narcissist?

2 minutes ago, Someone here said:

2)you didn't answer your age. It's totally up to you.  I ain't gonna ask it again if you don't feel comfy telling it .

34

2 minutes ago, Someone here said:

3)so looks don't matter to you?  If you see a super hot chick like Kate Upton..it doesn't get your ding dong going ?

First of all, kate upton is bottom of the barrel, her personality and facial expressions are fake and lifeless.

Great energy, a great smile, a living joyful thing is attractive. It doesn't matter what they look like if there energy is amazing, what they look like is a secondary fantasy for me.

Ass, a pretty face and tits matter to me at a glance and in theory, but its worthless in practice for real sex.

When watching porn I'm doing it like you guys, hot girls and dirty fantasies, but after a while it gets boring and I focus on emotions. In real life its worse because you already had sex with her 100 times so the body isnt as important it becomes about emotions right away. 


How is this post just me acting out my ego in the usual ways? Is this post just me venting and justifying my selfishness? Are the things you are posting in alignment with principles of higher consciousness and higher stages of ego development? Are you acting in a mature or immature way? Are you being selfish or selfless in your communication? Are you acting like a monkey or like a God-like being?

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28 minutes ago, integral said:

It is difficult if she does not want to have sex with me? I must be a narcissist?

Gotcha . So you want tons of   intimacy and emotional foreplay before the actual fucking . 

No it doesnt make you narcissist lol. Not sure from  where is that guy pulling out his analysis ?. 

28 minutes ago, integral said:

34

Research shows that testosterone starts dropping significantly when you hit your 30s. So that might play a role in your dismissal of the fucking .

I know because when I was like 18 I swear I got get hard just by the thought of sex . But nowadays that I'm 26 I must find a really arousing porn movie to get an erection.

Must be even more difficult for older dudes .

28 minutes ago, integral said:

First of all, kate upton is bottom of the barrel, her personality and facial expressions are fake and lifeless.

WAH?! She is a fucking godless. ? 

To each his own I guess  ?. 

28 minutes ago, integral said:

Great energy, a great smile, a living joyful thing is attractive. It doesn't matter what they look like if there energy is amazing, what they look like is a secondary fantasy for me.

Ass, a pretty face and tits matter to me at a glance and in theory, but its worthless in practice for real sex.

When watching porn I'm doing it like you guys, hot girls and dirty fantasies, but after a while it gets boring and I focus on emotions. In real life its worse because you already had sex with her 100 times so the body isnt as important it becomes about emotions right away. 

Yup .that is why I prefer porn than real sex with my gf . Because porn gives you endless variety to choose from .

Edited by Someone here

"life is not a problem to be solved ..its a mystery to be lived "

-Osho

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A girl will have to flirt with me for me to find her attractive. This has some demerits .

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5 hours ago, Someone here said:

What do you mean there is a mental reason behind being attract to certain body parts ?

I'm sorry to use this vulgar language with you ..but men think with their dic** ..not with their brain . Whatever gets the Don up is what's the man attracted to .

Women are different imo. They don't care much about physical appearance. They just want that one dream guy . But society nowadays has emasculated most of men . So its actually difficult to find a high quality man to date nowadays. 

 

Ok, so I read this whole thread up to this point ( the time I'm making this post). You said "when I was like 18yrs old, I swear I got hard just by the "THOUGHT" of sex. I highlighted the word "thought". What do you think that is . MENTAL. "I must find a really "AROUSING" porn movie to get an erection". Again, arousal starts with the mind. What arouses you might be different from what arouses someone else. Its relative to your mind. " I like soft, lovely, cute voice...huge turn on". Again, MENTAL. You cannot grab someone's voice or see it physically, you are using your sense of hearing. MENTAL. "As human beings we're innate to using our senses". Boom!! There's the Climax. Almost everything you stated in your responses to @integral was showing how sexual attraction starts from the mental. ALL IS MENTAL. Hope you can see the correlation from what I'm saying with regards to the physical and mental.

All that said, what @integral is saying I can understand. He has integrated his physical sexual attraction and mental attraction more holistically and it is coming from a more sustainable level. The physical doesn't excite him as much as the mental because the physical is second order(so-to-speak). His attraction is more long lasting and he'll be more able to sustain a longer-lasting relationship with a partner. This is why you need a higher dose of porn to get excited and sex with your gf is not as exciting as watching porn. You're young but you have to be careful of all that porn because it will desensitize you and can be the cause of porn addiction and unrelatable real life intimate sexual encounters. A lot of older men when they get to a certain age need viagra or become impotent because of this dynamic. He's not saying he doesn't get excited by a woman's features, I believe he's saying he gets more excited by the inner first which in-turn extends to the outer. That usually comes from maturity. If he maintains this dichotomy, his sex life will be more sustainable, long-lasting, more enjoyable and without the need for outside stimuli. 

P.S. Liking a cute, sexy, soft voice has nothing to do with pedophilia. So don't worry about that. Our sexual likes and dislikes all stem from something in the brain and different for everyone to an extent. I know some straight men who like women with deep crusty voices. Doesn't mean they like men. We're all different and unique but our likes and dislikes, for the most part, stems from the subconscious and we're not even aware of the reasons why we're attracted to or repelled from things unless we become consciously aware of what our minds are doing. 

 

 

6 hours ago, Someone here said:

What do you mean there is a mental reason behind being attract to certain body parts ?

I'm sorry to use this vulgar language with you ..but men think with their dic** ..not with their brain . Whatever gets the Don up is what's the man attracted to .

Women are different imo. They don't care much about physical appearance. They just want that one dream guy . But society nowadays has emasculated most of men . So its actually difficult to find a high quality man to date nowadays. 

 

 


Unconditional love is all there is. 

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6 hours ago, integral said:

so the body isnt as important it becomes about emotions right away. 

I'm starting to notice the same with me actually.

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10 hours ago, Princess Arabia said:

Ok, so I read this whole thread up to this point ( the time I'm making this post). You said "when I was like 18yrs old, I swear I got hard just by the "THOUGHT" of sex. I highlighted the word "thought". What do you think that is . MENTAL. "I must find a really "AROUSING" porn movie to get an erection". Again, arousal starts with the mind. What arouses you might be different from what arouses someone else. Its relative to your mind. " I like soft, lovely, cute voice...huge turn on". Again, MENTAL. You cannot grab someone's voice or see it physically, you are using your sense of hearing. MENTAL. "As human beings we're innate to using our senses". Boom!! There's the Climax. Almost everything you stated in your responses to @integral was showing how sexual attraction starts from the mental. ALL IS MENTAL. Hope you can see the correlation from what I'm saying with regards to the physical and mental.

All that said, what @integral is saying I can understand. He has integrated his physical sexual attraction and mental attraction more holistically and it is coming from a more sustainable level. The physical doesn't excite him as much as the mental because the physical is second order(so-to-speak). His attraction is more long lasting and he'll be more able to sustain a longer-lasting relationship with a partner. This is why you need a higher dose of porn to get excited and sex with your gf is not as exciting as watching porn. You're young but you have to be careful of all that porn because it will desensitize you and can be the cause of porn addiction and unrelatable real life intimate sexual encounters. A lot of older men when they get to a certain age need viagra or become impotent because of this dynamic. He's not saying he doesn't get excited by a woman's features, I believe he's saying he gets more excited by the inner first which in-turn extends to the outer. That usually comes from maturity. If he maintains this dichotomy, his sex life will be more sustainable, long-lasting, more enjoyable and without the need for outside stimuli. 

P.S. Liking a cute, sexy, soft voice has nothing to do with pedophilia. So don't worry about that. Our sexual likes and dislikes all stem from something in the brain and different for everyone to an extent. I know some straight men who like women with deep crusty voices. Doesn't mean they like men. We're all different and unique but our likes and dislikes, for the most part, stems from the subconscious and we're not even aware of the reasons why we're attracted to or repelled from things unless we become consciously aware of what our minds are doing. 

 

 

 

Wow ! Thanks for your post.  I'm amazed by how you understand the male sexuality being a woman. 


"life is not a problem to be solved ..its a mystery to be lived "

-Osho

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13 minutes ago, Someone here said:

Wow ! Thanks for your post.  I'm amazed by how you understand the male sexuality being a woman. 

I have to deal with men sexually, you don't.


Unconditional love is all there is. 

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7 minutes ago, Princess Arabia said:

I have to deal with men sexually, you don't.

Well..I do have some homosexual tendencies.  I'm not gay ..but I can appreciate a really handsome dude just as I appreciate a beautiful girl . But just impartial appreciation. I didn't get an erection to a man before.  And i find gay porn to be gross . But like i said I'm not 100 % straight. 

Thing is ..People fantasise all the time about weird, freaky, illegal things .

incest and rape porn are extremely popular, for example, but the people who watch that don't want to be raped or shag their relatives.  Very weird dynamic .


"life is not a problem to be solved ..its a mystery to be lived "

-Osho

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1 minute ago, Someone here said:

Well..I do have some homosexual tendencies.  I'm not gay ..but I can appreciate a really handsome dude just as I appreciate a beautiful girl . But just impartial appreciation. I didn't get an erection to a man before.  And i find gay porn to be gross . But like i said I'm not 100 % straight. 

Thing is ..People fantasise all the time about weird, freaky, illegal things .

incest and rape porn are extremely popular, for example, but the people who watch that don't want to be raped or shag their relatives.  Very weird dynamic .

That's why i said it's all mental. Appreciating a guy's handsomeness is not a homosexual tendency if you don't become sexually aroused. You can appreciate a cute baby, doesn't mean you're sexually attracted to babies. I look at beautiful women all the time, doesn't mean I get turned on by them sexually. Don't get these terms confused.  Also, that same porn star you're attracted to onscreen would probably not get you as excited after awhile if she was your real life gf because now it's a different kind of mental dynamic.


Unconditional love is all there is. 

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21 hours ago, Someone here said:

Just saying.. this might have something to do with pedophile..because youger girls have more of that kind of voice .

I certainly like younger voices but girls between age 18-23 aren't attractive to me past physical looks. They are just too naïve/stupid for me.

I only date women.

Edited by Roy

hrhrhtewgfegege

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