Nilsi

I turned my life around in less than a year

8 posts in this topic

When I first came here some 9 months ago, I did so because I needed help: Years of intense spiritual seeking had robbed me of my zest for life and left me in a state of profound nihilism, derealization and existential angst.

Besides getting accepted into university, I had not much going for me: I was underweight, lethargic and lost in a new country with no friends and social life.

As far as I was concerned, I had completed my spiritual quest and found myself "back in the village," so for the first time in years I had no real goal to pursue.

After a lot of soul searching, I came to the conclusion that I should get serious about the "ordinary" and age appropriate things in life I had neglected so far. Having been extremely competitive my entire life, I knew from experience I could achieve anything, if I really put my mind to it. 

I realized that I would need to find a mentor and that, as much as I admire them, people like Leo, Schmachtenberger and Wilber were not cut out for the job. So after some exploration, I elected German philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche as my guru on time - a choice that would turn out to be way more appropriate, than I could possibly have anticipated.

For those of you unfamiliar with the character of Nietzsche: imagine a mix of enlightened Zen master, ancient Greek sage and sleezy Wall Street hustler. Exactly the kind of guy you want for a job like this.

Nietzsche was a sharp and ruthless critic of truth-seeking, asceticism and compassion and all the adjacent ideals and ideology. The man obviously had his fair share of spiritual experiences and divine insight, which gave him the necessary authority and credibility to talk about these things - and persuade a gentle soul like me to descend to the profane and face human business in all it's ugliness and brutality.

The first thing I took away was to study physiology. I started as a chain-smoking vegan with the libido of a 40 year old woman - I quit smoking, got on an animal based diet, started going to the gym regularly and gained almost 20lbs of mostly lean muscle; I have what feels like unlimited energy nowadays.

The next thing I put my mind to was learning skills. Nietzsche was a big believer in the classical education of liberal arts with a strong emphasis on thinking, writing and speaking. I read over 70 of the greatest books in the western canon, started journalling, went out and talked to 100s of people and started to study sales & marketing.

Finally, I dropped out of college and got myself a hyper-competitive sales job. That might sound like a downgrade to some of you, but having struggled with shyness and social anxiety my entire life, this is absolutely huge for me. I reached out cold to hundreds of businesses and applied myself to be their sales guy - having no prior experience, college degree or anything else to really show for. After a heap of phone calls and me confronting my inner demons and trauma around putting myself out there, I got invited to some in person interviews. I drove 1000km, became sick, got food poisoning and had my wallet stolen - and I fucking nailed that interview.

I'm now moving to one of the biggest cities in Europe to start my new job; I'm jacked and full of zest; I'm profoundly educated in western thought (and I have barely scratched the surface yet); My confidence and charisma has skyrocketed...

What's the catch? There isn't a catch, really. You would think at least my spirituality must have suffered - and while I don't find as much room to be mystical as before, there is still plenty.

I've gotten some profound insight and wisdom from this wild ride, but it really boils down to: what you get out of life is exactly what you put into it.


“We are most nearly ourselves when we achieve the seriousness of the child at play.” - Heraclitus

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Well done. I don't have the courage and determination to pull off what you did. University is too comfortable.

Edited by The Mystical Man

"Make a gift of your life and lift all mankind by being kind, considerate, forgiving, and compassionate at all times, in all places, and under all conditions, with everyone as well as yourself. That is the greatest gift anyone can give." - Dr. David R. Hawkins

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31 minutes ago, The Mystical Man said:

University is too comfortable.

That's the bottleneck. I absolutely loathed everything about being in university.

I always come back to that Pink Floyd song: "You gotta be crazy, you gotta have a real need"

Edited by Nilsi

“We are most nearly ourselves when we achieve the seriousness of the child at play.” - Heraclitus

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19 minutes ago, Bob Seeker said:

@Nilsi what were the top 10 books you read?

  1. Sex, Ecology, Spirituality
  2. Thus Spoke Zarathustra
  3. Finite & Infinite Games

I'm not doing 10.


“We are most nearly ourselves when we achieve the seriousness of the child at play.” - Heraclitus

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well done nilsi, i remember when you posted 9 months ago and i chipped in a word or two to the thread you started, you are an altogether different man now, congrats and keep killing it

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1 hour ago, gettoefl said:

well done nilsi, i remember when you posted 9 months ago and i chipped in a word or two to the thread you started, you are an altogether different man now, congrats and keep killing it

Appreciate it! :x

Edited by Nilsi

“We are most nearly ourselves when we achieve the seriousness of the child at play.” - Heraclitus

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