Thought Art

Self Love

34 posts in this topic

Imagine being afraid to love deeply…

This has been so much of my life…

Too ashamed to love myself
Too ashamed to love my partner 
Too ashamed to love my work
Too ashamed to love my body 
Too ashamed to love my community
Too ashamed to love my art
Too ashamed to love my life… 
Too ashamed to believe in myself 
Too ashamed to be sober 
Too ashamed to honour my life
Too ashamed to forgive myself 
Too ashamed to create art 
Too ashamed to take a risk
Too ashamed to say what I think
Too ashamed to admit I don’t know
Too ashamed to speak to a girl 
Too ashamed to heal
Too ashamed to share my beauty and proclaim my rarity 
Etc 

If this is you, realize you don’t need to live this way. 

You can love every inch of yourself.
This should be the most obvious thing in the world. 

Every human, every child, every person should know that they deserve love. 

You are love. 
Love is your most fundamental nature. 

The toxic culture we are a part of is complete bullshit. 

Pain, suffering, fear, addiction, etc… move way from it all. Move towards self care, self love, health, balance, wisdom, self honesty, self forgiveness, sobriety, etc

You can know someone’s Intelligence by how loving they are. The rest is nonesense.

To love reality deeply is the purest, most fundamental orientation to have in life. All your other ideas of success are secondary.


 "Unburdened and Becoming" - Bon Iver

                            ◭"89"

                  

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brilliant, as always. Shame is an inherent part of being human. it is the feeling of being unworthy of your community, which is what gives you survival. The community causes this not out of malice or stupidity, it's that it wants you to be a gear that contributes to survival, it doesn't matter if you're happy or not, you have to be functional.

For those of us who have been educated in total madness, in true sick dysfunction, shame was really strong and the need to leave it behind leads to a real awakening to what reality is. a very strange process. In the end, we must thank those deformed beings absolutely lacking in love that we have had to have close by for giving us the necessary push

Edited by Breakingthewall

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@Breakingthewall Make a distinction between healthy and toxic shame

Edited by Thought Art

 "Unburdened and Becoming" - Bon Iver

                            ◭"89"

                  

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11 minutes ago, Thought Art said:

@Breakingthewall Make a distinction between healthy and toxic shame

Any shame is toxic to me. Shame is giving up your sovereignty to the group. Its the feeling that something is wrong with me and makes me unworthy of love. I was just saying that shame is a mechanism of social control. a negative mechanism. those of us who have decided to completely leave shame behind act by positive mechanisms. for real ethics, integrity by realizing that others are you. but this is not valid for everyone.

Edited by Breakingthewall

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4 minutes ago, Breakingthewall said:

Any shame is toxic to me. It is the feeling that something is wrong with me and makes me unworthy of love. I was just saying that shame is a mechanism of social control. a negative mechanism. those of us who have decided to completely leave shame behind act by positive mechanisms. for real ethics, integrity by realizing that others are you. but this is not valid for everyone.

Warranted shame can actually be a powerful teacher.
 

Unwarranted shame keeps us trapped in victimhood, however. 


"Wisdom is not in knowing all the answers, but in seeking the right questions." -Gemini AI

 

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13 minutes ago, Yimpa said:

Warranted shame can actually be a powerful teacher.
 

Unwarranted shame keeps us trapped in victimhood, however. 

justified or not is a circumstantial distinction. it depends on your environment. if you realize that you are reality, shame disappears. another thing is that you decide to hide something to avoid certain consequences, but within yourself you have no shame

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@Yimpa

well maybe yes, you can be ashamed. for leaving aside integrity for social acceptance for example. but I would not say that this is shame, it is rather a feeling of guilt. Shame is always associated with others, even though in the end you internalize it. I think it's a defining characteristic of shame, it really comes from outside

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6 hours ago, Thought Art said:

To love reality deeply is the purest, most fundamental orientation to have in life. All your other ideas of success are secondary.

Yes, and to love yourself deeply, first of all. You can't love existence deeply if you don't love yourself deeply. Its mechanism is similar to the mechanism of making a girl feel deep love and excitement by having that love and excitement towards yourself first. You then just spread it to external aspects of existence.

Self-love -> Mental-emotional health -> Physical health. Everything else is secondary (except beauty and truth).

 

1 hour ago, Breakingthewall said:

In the end, we must thank those deformed beings absolutely lacking in love that we have had to have close by for giving us the necessary push

Yes, those twisted humans who have destroyed our souls actually forced us to be strong and grow. It's paradoxical. 

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12 hours ago, jimwell said:

Yes, and to love yourself deeply, first of all. You can't love existence deeply if you don't love yourself deeply. Its mechanism is similar to the mechanism of making a girl feel deep love and excitement by having that love and excitement towards yourself first. You then just spread it to external aspects of existence.

Self-love -> Mental-emotional health -> Physical health. Everything else is secondary (except beauty and truth).

 

Yes, those twisted humans who have destroyed our souls actually forced us to be strong and grow. It's paradoxical. 

The thing is that almost all humans are deformed. the difference is the level, if the level is low you can tolerate it and you spend your whole life trying to fit into the shoe, with more or less success. if the level is high, such as being around in your teens an alcoholic who drink gin for breakfast addicted suicidal hitler worshiper who has raised you to idolize him, you have to get out of that kind of joke anyway trying not to leave a trace of that influence in you because it is completely negative, then it is a kind of liberation, so at the end it's an advantage . If not, as a human, it's very difficult to detach yourself of the social influence 

Edited by Breakingthewall

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There is healthy shame. Keeps you from becoming a psychopath 


 "Unburdened and Becoming" - Bon Iver

                            ◭"89"

                  

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What I belive helps with loving ourselves is to observe ourselves as we are, with compassion and acceptance. Some parts in us make sense and complementary, others are contradictory and chaotic, a total mess. But it's all fine. I believe that people who know and accept themselves to such a degree with all their complexities are people who cannot be easily controlled by society because society's attempts to make them feel guilty, ashamed, fearful, self hating, fail.


Let Love In

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shame is comparative. it is always in relation to another person, or to an archetype. not accepting yourself as you are is because you think you should be different, and you think that because you look at others and they seem better than you. That whole line of processing is wrong, it leads you straight to being a small...i don't know. Small. you are reality, you are the only measure, you are the one who values what appears in your field of consciousness, not vice versa. You are not susceptible to evaluation, neither good nor bad, you are you and that's it. it is the other that will be valued to decide if it is suitable or not for you 

But, you , or at least me, must give the best of myself. It's not a matter of shame or self esteem, it's because I have to honor myself. It is my duty and not fulfilling it does not even arise. It's not out of shame, it's out of love.

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@Breakingthewall What line of processing? 
 

Healthy shame is what stops you from shitting on the Walmart floor. 
 

Toxic shame is when you have shame that disrupts your ability to live a good healthy life 


 "Unburdened and Becoming" - Bon Iver

                            ◭"89"

                  

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9 hours ago, Thought Art said:

@Breakingthewall What line of processing? 
 

Healthy shame is what stops you from shitting on the Walmart floor. 
 

Toxic shame is when you have shame that disrupts your ability to live a good healthy life 

I d not say that shame but ethics and respect. I wouldn't shitting in Walmart floor even if it was empty and no one was going to see me. That would do the typical small son of a bitch who has that way of processing in which he feels ashamed and is resentful for it

Edited by Breakingthewall

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@Breakingthewall Whatever you’re ignoring the obvious or just making distinctions with a map different from mine. All good.


 "Unburdened and Becoming" - Bon Iver

                            ◭"89"

                  

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On 27/02/2023 at 7:24 AM, Breakingthewall said:

Any shame is toxic to me. Shame is giving up your sovereignty to the group. Its the feeling that something is wrong with me and makes me unworthy of love. I was just saying that shame is a mechanism of social control. a negative mechanism. those of us who have decided to completely leave shame behind act by positive mechanisms. for real ethics, integrity by realizing that others are you. but this is not valid for everyone.

kudos to that

 

On 27/02/2023 at 9:35 PM, Thought Art said:

@Breakingthewall

Healthy shame is what stops you from shitting on the Walmart floor. 

I think you are confusing it with just basic survival knowledge on what one should or shouldn't do to not get in trouble.

Hawkins rated Shame as literally the lowest vibration on the whole fucking universe. Something with a LOC so Low that is very close to literally 'death' can't be healthy ...

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@Javfly33 no.. who cares what Hawkins said. 
 

That knowledge or even desires to not get in trouble in society is what I am calling healthy shame. 

Edited by Thought Art

 "Unburdened and Becoming" - Bon Iver

                            ◭"89"

                  

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17 hours ago, Thought Art said:

@Javfly33 no.. who cares what Hawkins said. 
 

That knowledge or even desires to not get in trouble in society is what I am calling healthy shame. 

I care more about Hawkins said that what you say for sure.

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@Javfly33 Yeah okay like he really knows. 
 

I still know little. 
 

But, I am not pulling my ideas out of my no where. 
 

Hawkins stuff is useful… but I think you will find it fails underneath the strain of human psychology 

Edited by Thought Art

 "Unburdened and Becoming" - Bon Iver

                            ◭"89"

                  

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