Leo Gura

What Makes A Good Man?

150 posts in this topic

What makes a good man?

1. Taking responsibility for their actions

2. Doing the work to overcome their toxic masculinity, shadow, trauma, 

3. whether you lead or follow, you do it with integrity 

4. You respect the consent and boundaries of other men, women and children. 
 

5. You do not abuse others emotionally, physically or sexually

6. You take your education, personal development and spirituality seriously 

7. You respect your community 

8. You act from a place of love, wisdom, intelligence and integrity 

9. You have your shit together: skills, finances, emotional mastery, healing work

10. You are acting in a way to lift up those around you. You create a safe space. 
 

11. You have stage green/ tier 2 view on other people, cultures

12. You are able to self reflect, and improve when you make mistakes 

13. You lead your brothers through the darkness of our current era to higher ground 

14. You are a good partner, father 

15. You have deep roots, and are dependable.

16. You life and act intentionally 

17. You love your brothers and sisters (humanity) 

18. You provide authentic value to the world… you do not scam, cheat and leech

19. You love yourself 

20. Strong sense of boundaries, assertive, strong, high self efficacy and self esteem

21. High emotional, social and adversity intelligence 

22. Ability to balance intuition and critical thinking 

23. Relatively honest with self and others 

24. Forgives and understands the mistakes and shortfalls of his brothers around the world and in difficult circumstances 

25. Sees a positive and constructive vision for the future 

Edited by Thought Art

 "Unburdened and Becoming" - Bon Iver

                            ◭"89"

                  

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The qualities of a good man are the qualities of a good leader, IMO.

  • Proactive
  • Self-control
  • Integrity
  • Caring
  • Calmness
  • Deduction skills and can navigate the dangers of their environment appropriately
  • Non-neediness
  • Strives to learn and develop themeselves in some way
  • Respectful
  • Passion
  • Honesty
  • Appropriately assertive
  • Experience
  • Dependability
  • Grooming and cleanliness (more of a modern thing perhaps)

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This topic has been one of my main contemplations for years. So many archetypes and nuance. Some key characteristics I can share as I walk to the gym:
 

  • Purpose driven.
  • Non-reactive when appropriate. Enough emotional reasoning to decide when to ignore the pull and when to submit to feelings. Tip of the iceberg. So many offshoots to this law. 
  • Honest and authentic. Charm stems directly out of this. Charm can effectively be called lying with the intention of being caught. 
  • Strength - physical and mental. No real reason to be weak in either category. 
  • More. 

Masculinity often defines itself in the context of a group. How you interact with other men and women shapes your brand of masculinity  

All these peak masculine traits are sharpened by learning from other good men. Almost impossible to polish without positive role models or conscious action. 

Spending time with women helps a man understand yin and rounds out the edges. Also helps you get laid. 

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His mind is cleaver and sharp, his heart is wide open and warm, his body is strong and healthy.

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His mind is slow and limited, his heart is shutdown and cold, his body bares the wight of his pain.

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To improve on my previous effort: a good man reduces the suffering of those around him.


All stories and explanations are false.

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He can go out of his way!

Edited by UnbornTao

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Integrity, in every sense of the word.

Edited by Carl-Richard

Intrinsic joy is revealed in the marriage of meaning and being.

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2 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

Don't overthink this with your nondual God-logic.

I don't think that line of reasoning has anything to do with "nondual God-logic". Average person from USA is going to have a radically different view on this matter than an average person from India for example. Questions like that can be answered only within a certain frame of reference.

I personally don't think about "good" or "bad", as characteristic of a person, but rather their actions. I believe that everyone is fundamentaly good. That begs the question: Why than people behave in ways that are hurtful for others or themselves? I believe that's because those people are themselves hurt (but does that makes them bad people??).

So than, lets put it this way: people who got through their healing process and therefore are aligned with their core authentic self (which is by default good).

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3 minutes ago, Mz Hyde said:

Average person from USA is going to have a radically different view on this matter than an average person from India for example.

Not as much as you think.


You are God. You are Truth. You are Love. You are Infinity.

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56 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

Not as much as you think.

Western societies have strong individualistic culture with a very specific set of values that is very different from collectivistic eastern societies and their values.

That was just an example, not the point of the post..

Edited by Mz Hyde

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-Emotional mastery

-Unafraid to exercise their authority when necessary

-Uses their strengths to nurture those around them, which creates a positive symbiotic relationship instead of a parasitic one

-The ability to stay consistent and determined

-Independent and self-sustaining

-Doesn't require an external authority to push them into doing what they need to do, they already have their drive and motivation figured out internally so that it doesn't need to be delegated to other people

-Reliable and credible, no excessive trickery or deceit

-Taking responsibility instead of shifting blame

-Being direct 

-A keen ability to discern deception from truth. Not getting sucked into games and trickery.

 


You are what you currently desire. ❤️

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A good man knows who he is and who he is not. He trusts his intentions. He places himself neither above nor below others. Serving them is the same as serving himself. He lives unconditionally and unapologetically. His value is realized within, and is unswayed by people's opinions. His work flows from him like the rain of a ready cloud. His rest returns the rain into the sky. He is not magnified by life, nor is he diminished by death.


Just because God loves you doesn't mean it is going to shape the cosmos to suit you. God loves you so much that it will shape you to suit the cosmos.

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39 minutes ago, Moksha said:

A good man knows who he is and who he is not. He trusts his intentions. He places himself neither above nor below others. Serving them is the same as serving himself. He lives unconditionally and unapologetically. His value is realized within, and is unswayed by people's opinions. His work flows from him like the rain of a ready cloud. His rest returns the rain into the sky. He is not magnified by life, nor is he diminished by death.

Nice post.

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A good man accepts life for what it is while also pushing ahead to make everything more perfect.

A good man accepts himself.

A good man looks to be as honest as he can.

A good man balances himself.

A good man looks internally before outwardly.

A good man chooses his battles with great consideration.

A good man makes the constant, conscious choice to be a good man.

A good man opens himself up to pain, frustration, loss, devastation, etc., as he knows running is a choice that leads to the unconscious living of his future self.

A good man loves.

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A good man plans and does noble work.

**

Why is the title for Man only? Why not for a Good Human Being/Person/Lady? Well I guess it will get more clicks.

Fundamentally, I think there's not much difference between a Good Man and a Good Lady, just that man has bigger responsibility to protect and improve his society.

Edited by hyruga

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  • Stoic.
  • Responsible for all around him and beyond. (Protector of Humanity)
  • A warrior on the garden.
  • Anima X Animus Integration.
  • Physical/Mental/Spiritual/Emotional Strenght.
  • Desire for being men for masculinity itself. (Checkout "On Being a Man - Eben Pagan aka David De Angelo).
  • Mentor of other men.
  • Think daily about his death. (Memento Mori)

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2 hours ago, Mz Hyde said:

Average person from USA is going to have a radically different view on this matter than an average person from India for example.

What makes a good man is universal, or archetypal. 


"Make a gift of your life and lift all mankind by being kind, considerate, forgiving, and compassionate at all times, in all places, and under all conditions, with everyone as well as yourself. That is the greatest gift anyone can give." - Dr. David R. Hawkins

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1. Have a penis.

2. Be a good person.

.......3? Identify as a man.

What makes a good person?

Well-developed spiritually, mentally, and emotionally. No denial or repression of “undesirable” characteristics. Physically well-developed is a bonus. Has a good balance of masculine and feminine energies and knows when a situation calls for more of one or the other. 

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