Abhishaik

Mum wants me to get an arranged marriage

7 posts in this topic

I’ve been in a long distance relationship with my GF for over 1 year and have showed my GF to my mum in real life recently. 
 

unfortunately my mum doesn’t approve of the relationship as my GF is not from the same ethnic background. My mum has threatened to commit suicide if I don’t get an arranged marriage. I’ve discussed this with my GF and it has really upset her. I feel like I might be forced to get an arranged marriage soon and I don’t want to waste me GFs time anymore. 
 

At the same time I want to build a future with my GF and eventually start a family with her. 
 

what should I do? Should I go against my mum on this or break up with my GF? 

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You should go for what you want your needs above all,they must submit to what you want, but at first there will be a storm that will pass...


Who teaches us whats real and how to laugh at lies? Who decides why we live and what we'll die to defend?Who chain us? And who holds the Key that can set us free? 

It's you.

You have all the weapons you need 

Now fight.

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@Abhishaik  Yes, please go against your mom. You are an adult, you are a man, this is 21st century.

Suicide is a pure manipulation on her part. It's very dirty play and you shouldn't encourage this kind of behaviour by complying with it. Also, I highly doubts that someone with such a huge ego like your mom will actually kill themselves.

But there will be a lot of drama, that's for sure...

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3 hours ago, Abhishaik said:

My mum has threatened to commit suicide if I don’t get an arranged marriage.

So an arranged marriage is magically going to heal your mum's "suicidal" tendencies? Be honest. Only thing she's willing to sacrifice is your life. And now you're thinking of throwing your girlfriend away for your mum. She's going to have to deal with you making your own decisions.

 

3 hours ago, Abhishaik said:

I feel like I might be forced to get an arranged marriage soon and I don’t want to waste me GFs time anymore. 
 

At the same time I want to build a future with my GF and eventually start a family with her.

Which one will allow you to lead a healthier and more fulfilling life down the road? One is based on love, the other on fear.

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Follow your own choice. You know you want your girlfriend and would like to build something with her. Don't allow a parent to control your happiness because of what they have threatened or to gain their approval. There will be a day when they aren't here and you'll have to continue the life they've laid out for you. It's better to make a life you actually want than be stuck with someone else's version of what life should be.

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On 1/10/2023 at 10:30 PM, katewashere said:

Follow your own choice. You know you want your girlfriend and would like to build something with her. Don't allow a parent to control your happiness because of what they have threatened or to gain their approval. There will be a day when they aren't here and you'll have to continue the life they've laid out for you. It's better to make a life you actually want than be stuck with someone else's version of what life should be.

pretty much this.

Set some boundaries.

Edited by UnbornTao

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