Leo Gura

So.... I Achieved Insanity

210 posts in this topic

18 minutes ago, StarStruck said:

Everybody is talking about insanity but we can't even agree on a definition.

Insanity is hell to me and after my experience I can define Hell as such:

in hell, you are fully aware that every nanosecond of your existence is FOR ETERNITY and is absolute torture. Plus, here’s the cherry on the cake: not only does it go on for eternity, each nanosecond gets progressively WORSE.  So , like I said, UNIMAGINABLE HORROR.

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@Leo Gura isn't insanity just the absence of all logic and stability? 

When I'm sane I experience reality to have a logical structure. The structure can be twisted and paradoxical, but you can intuit a meaning in all that.

I would assume insanity is just the infinite opposite to that.

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@Leo Gura In that state of Insanity:

- was Love and Beauty obviously there as fundamental properties of Consciousness?
- was your perception of "Other" still seen as just figment of your imagination?
- was there some understanding of ability to change your body with Consciousness (like you tried to heal the body in the past)?
- on some non-linear scale - what state felt higher in Consciousness - the quirky mouse or the Insanity?


In the Vast Expanse everything that arises is Lively Awakened Awareness.

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27 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

Grasping Infinity and insanity are very different things.

When trying to grasp it, 

I wonder if infinity shouldn't be thought of as in the lemniscate/infinity symbol ( a horizontal figure 8) where there is like an equilibrium and the middle point could represent 'the nothingness' so it doesn't go into insanity  or it does actually expands forever (even if it could be imagined as in the infinity symbol where the loops continue to expand but there is stability to be found in the centre point, idk...since I guess it can't be grasped with the mind, perhaps I'm trying to look for an appeasing explanation to avoid going insane.. xD

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18 minutes ago, Someone here said:

@Leo Gura can you describe this experience visually?  Like what did you particularly see ? Because I can't make sense of pure insanity without imagining my visul field melting away into some salvia fluid trip.

There was a lot of visuals. I'll try to write up a doc like I did for my Peotic Description of God Consciousness.

13 minutes ago, OBEler said:

@Leo Gura omg you never watched Joker (2019)? ?it was the best movie of the year. For me one of the best movies of all time. 

I have a huge aversion to superhero movies.

I know Joker is different, but still.

I'll prolly watch it some day but it's not a high priority for me.

12 minutes ago, newbee said:

Wasn't that because their colleagues didn't agree with their theories and their ridicule and overall emotional abuse made them go insane?

I don't think that's enough to make one insane. I think if any of these people truly went insane it's because they became very isolated and then bore a hole through their own minds with very deep contemplations.

7 minutes ago, Vynce said:

@Leo Gura isn't insanity just the absence of all logic and stability? 

When I'm sane I experience reality to have a logical structure. The structure can be twisted and paradoxical, but you can intuit a meaning in all that.

I would assume insanity is just the infinite opposite to that.

Yes, this is in the right direction.

It's a sort of mind-twisting illogic.


You are God. You are Truth. You are Love. You are Infinity.

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@Leo Gura

I think of hell as Infinite Separation (opposed as Infinite Unity) or Infinite Division, between different parts of reality you identify with and different parts of reality you don't idenitify with, or in other words, Infinite Division between different layers and parts of your Mind. Is insanity something like that? Where every part of your Mind is infinitely in chaos regarding other parts?


Been on the healing journey for 5 committed years: traumas, deep wounds, negative beliefs, emotional blockages, internal fragmentation, blocked chakras, tight muscles, deep tensions, dysfunctional relationship dynamics. --> Check out my posts for info on how to heal:

https://www.actualized.org/forum/topic/82579-what-causes-anhedonia-how-can-it-be-cured/?page=2#comment-1167003

 

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@Leo Gura You are not insane, but you don't seem well, either. You seem confused about basic language stuff, which can happen if you isolate yourself from people for prolonged periods of time. You just lost common sense. That's a step back, if you ask me, but do whatever you want. In all cases, this is concerning, and I hope you don't hurt yourself in the process. Be well.


Foolish until proven other-wise ;)

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7 minutes ago, Superfluo said:

@Leo Gura

I think of hell as Infinite Separation (opposed as Infinite Unity) or Infinite Division, between different parts of reality you identify with and different parts of reality you don't idenitify with, or in other words, Infinite Division between different layers and parts of your Mind. Is insanity something like that? Where every part of your Mind is infinitely in chaos regarding other parts?

Hell is like the Christian notion. It's like a nightmare of horrors and suffering.

Insanity is not that. It's more like you broke your mind and entered a new domain of illogical objects. Actually, insanity is like a hyper dimension of consciousness full of impossible objects and utter fucking weirdness. It doesn't have demons and suffering in it per se. Although of course nothing is stopping you from blending both hell and insanity together.

Edited by Leo Gura

You are God. You are Truth. You are Love. You are Infinity.

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14 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

There was a lot of visuals. I'll try to write up a doc like I did for my Peotic Description of God Consciousness

Good to hear .

Do you think it deserves a YouTube episode ? Or just a quickie on the blog would be  sufficient? 


"life is not a problem to be solved ..its a mystery to be lived "

-Osho

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4 minutes ago, Gesundheit2 said:

@Leo Gura You are not insane, but you don't seem well, either. You seem confused about basic language stuff, which can happen if you isolate yourself from people for prolonged periods of time. You just lost common sense. That's a step back, if you ask me, but do whatever you want. In all cases, this is concerning, and I hope you don't hurt yourself in the process. Be well.

I’d like some examples 


 "Unburdened and Becoming" - Bon Iver

                            ◭"89"

                  

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@Leo Gura

Have you also experienced Infinite Hell in the past?


Been on the healing journey for 5 committed years: traumas, deep wounds, negative beliefs, emotional blockages, internal fragmentation, blocked chakras, tight muscles, deep tensions, dysfunctional relationship dynamics. --> Check out my posts for info on how to heal:

https://www.actualized.org/forum/topic/82579-what-causes-anhedonia-how-can-it-be-cured/?page=2#comment-1167003

 

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@Leo Gura By the way, could you love the insanity? Could you love this part of consciousness as you would love logical consciousness? Would be interesting to know.

And did this love turn the insanity upside down to sanity?

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I experienced insanity both on Psilocybin and LSD. It is an horrific experience, completely bizare, confusing and even terrifying. On the one hand, you can have epic insights and crazy experiences and on the other hand, nothing makes sense. It feels like the mind is dysfunctional, and that something really wierd is happening in the brain. 

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@Leo Gura Godel's Incompletness Theorem wouldn't be so dangerous to most of modern scientists if it stops at some point. As all infinity??. Got some mathematicians in my family, aunts, uncles,  my mom.. Once I was listening their discussion on Cantor's Set Theory. That was very close to insanity???‍??

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31 minutes ago, Vynce said:

@Leo Gura By the way, could you love the insanity? Could you love this part of consciousness as you would love logical consciousness? Would be interesting to know.

And did this love turn the insanity upside down to sanity?

you can't just love something that you naturally resist and find revolting.  You can try to be as fearless as possible which is what ultimately produces love. 

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2 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

The best way to get out is to surrender to it and try to enjoy it. Eventually the mind exhausts itself

From my own experience although likely not to the degree of yours, this seems the way. There was a point where I remember being like oh well, just fuck it, that’s that, it’s game over for me, whilst then not even having any idea what ‘me’ was, or what game I was on about to myself. Was just a case of that is that, I don’t know what’s going on, or what I’m even doing, had I ever even done anything or had I just made it all up. And every single thing about what I was just went well that’s that then, fuck it, and the state sort of began to dissolve. I gained so much respect after that experience for having my ordinary sober state of mind, and so much respect of how twisted and insane a mind can become. I empathise with people who may be in such states regularly now rather than judging. Gained an understanding that wasn’t previously there. At the same time looking back it was hilarious and I do not class it as a bad trip at all. Eye opening

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1 hour ago, Leo Gura said:

 

I don't think that's enough to make one insane. I think if any of these people truly went insane it's because they became very isolated and then bore a hole through their own minds with very deep contemplations.

 

Sure, it's about multiple factors, but speaking of mental illness I've seen a testimonial of a girl who spoke of an NDE (Near Death Experience)   that she got from going into a shock and then into a coma and all she remembers prior to that, is that she was in a deep, deep depression.  Since she seems overweight, I assume she was severely bullied, but it goes to show how even depression can literally kill someone even if they weren't tying to kill themselves.

And don't forget to check this docu out if you need to study more cases to find out why someone can go insane.  Although this is considered demonic posession by some, it seems equally horrifying and my gut tells me that some severe emotionally and or sexually abusive event(s) must have led up to this..

 

 

 

Edited by newbee

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Meditation is good for sanity :)

7593b5490e6940b97da0c1c9ff4f1a23--starwa

Meditate more you must -_-

Edited by The Mystical Man

"Make a gift of your life and lift all mankind by being kind, considerate, forgiving, and compassionate at all times, in all places, and under all conditions, with everyone as well as yourself. That is the greatest gift anyone can give." - Dr. David R. Hawkins

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There is a field of consciousness I would call Arymanic. It goes deeper than "Luciferic" or any other so-called fallen angel consciousness, I suppose... Self-annihilating strange attractor... but everything is for something; it has some meaning, it points to something.

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