Federico del pueblo

Humiliated and descended to the lowest level a man can experience

44 posts in this topic

Quote

I reflected again and realized that most of my strong emotional reaction on that night was not primarily due to the guy himself.

Nice.

2 hours ago, Federico del pueblo said:

you've been working on something for a decade. The first years after getting I'll you just somehow manage to finish your academic studies. My entire masters degree I had to do while already being sick and not even knowing what I was sick with. Then after that I worked for some time as an engineer, basically just suffering from symptoms every day, but torturing myself because I had no idea what else to do.

Then I stopped working. The condition had already gotten drastically worse at this point, so I regret my former choices of just continuing and not stopping sooner.

Then several years of research about the illness, using that drastically reduced mental energy I still had (which was more suffering).

Then several years of taking specific action based on the new understanding, failed approaches, more research, more approaches that didn't work etc.

And now finally making some improvements (but rather slow and much more is still needed).

If then somebody like that dude comes along and judges me solely based on the most surface level fact that I'm not working then this is like some final drop that makes the barrel burst.

Yeah, I get it.

The main thing to realize here is that the other guy doesn't know any of this. If you pay attention, you can see yourself constructing this entire story in the moment and then getting pulled in emotionally. You can see yourself applying this entire story to what the guy said to you, and then getting emotional about it. You can actually learn to not do this, and let it go instead. You can get really good at it. Just make the decision to forfeit the emotional treachery you are about to pull yourself into. It's actually way easier and much more efficient to do this. You will feel a bunch of emotional pressure building up and then you'll be like "nope, not gonna even consider this seriously" and then all of that pressure will just instantly eviscerate, because you aren't pulling yourself into the ego's story anymore. It really is that simple and easy. Remember, your emotional well-being is always top priority, above all else. If you are at unease emotionally, it is because of some sort of resistance and misalignment with reality, so there is never a situation where being emotionally unwell will benefit you or make sense. If you deeply understand the importance of being emotionally well, whenever a situation arises that affects your emotions, it will instantly send alarms off and you will be like "woah, I need to let go of whatever story I'm thinking of right now which is causing this feeling in me". It will become natural to you.

In a sense, you kind of have to override your ego's desire to be "right" here. Being "right" means pulling yourself into a debate with the person, which is as we said is unsustainable and unproductive. Being "right" means being emotionally unwell. Overall it's just not smart. Being "right" means wrestling with the pig. What is truly right, is having enough respect for yourself to not engage with any of this nonsense.

2 hours ago, Federico del pueblo said:

Thanks for your detailed answer!

My pleasure.

2 hours ago, Federico del pueblo said:

He is basically judging a mental image that he created, which he confuses with myself.

Yep. This is a massive insight.

Edited by Osaid

You are what you currently desire. ❤️

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@Federico del pueblo Evil is more active than ever in the world rn. Just know that you are not alone in this. Including myself. People who are deeply in ego like this are suffering inmensely. He might be secretly unconsciously jealous of you ;). Ignore it. Its not even worth thinking about such comment. Its just that you might need more perspective to lift you up to see the reality. Try microdosing psychedelics to help you stay clear minded and see a little more truth than illusion. I dont know if you smoke or use weed, but when I go to social events like these were you might find people who are after others from long time, you gotta be prepared in the highest mood possible. I would probably wear one earbud with music the whole event plus smoked up. No body will be able to touch you and they will be intimidated by your presence. Such comments wont be possible in their minds. Even if someone insults you, it wont touch you and your memory wont record it. 

An example of this, was when 2 guys from my job whom I cut contact, came to wish me HBD on purpose to annoy and told me how they know I dont talk to them anymore but still they wanted to wish me the best. Ofc, I felt their intentions. Hehe, little they knew I was fully smoked up that day and just laughed my ass off when they came (without taking my eyes off the screen) :)

If I were you that day, (being smoked up with earbud) I would had just listened without reaction, then slowly start dancing while looking at him no words, wink+ Full teeth Smile  and slowly walk away dancing. Making him explode in anger. 

 

 

Edited by Kalki Avatar

Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know. - Jeremiah 33:3

https://open.spotify.com/track/4V0rRwRqhFPxSJb40XmKA1?si=lNN5hNRPTxi6zNzzi9gFqw&utm_source=copy-link

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This is a great opportunity for spiritual work. 

"One of the fundamental insights about emotional maturity is that we are responsible for our own emotional lives. No one makes us feel any particular way." - Adyashanti

What others say and do shouldn't dictate how you feel. I know it's not easy, and I can relate to your need for respect. I've felt disrespected before, but later I realized that my feeling had nothing to do with what other people did. It had to do with the stories I was telling myself. It's not easy to see through these stories. You have to see through it again and again. You have to practice this over and over again like you'd practice anything else. 


"Make a gift of your life and lift all mankind by being kind, considerate, forgiving, and compassionate at all times, in all places, and under all conditions, with everyone as well as yourself. That is the greatest gift anyone can give." - Dr. David R. Hawkins

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