Razard86

Why I love my Ego

13 posts in this topic

Thank You Ego for protecting me. Thank You for helping me survive all the horrible things that happened to me. Ego I know all that you do is to keep me safe. But Ego, you are like an overbearing mother, a tyrannical father, you are dysfunctional at times because in your attempt to protect you block growth. You try to house infinity, in a room a comfortable room and you think infinity should be satisfied and content with being housed in such a room. You are the butler who serves the master, but sometimes clings so hard that you attempt to take control. 

What eventually is revealed is that you sneakily hijacked everything in the formative years to keep infinity from experiencing all of itself. You constructed a safe haven because a tiny piece of infinity is unable to fend for itself and it needs protection. Your protection is out of love, but your attempt to trick infinity into thinking it is finite, while masterfully done out of love, has robbed infinity of recognizing itself as its true self as infinite.

So thank you ego, for constructing such a nice and comfortable room, for creating beautiful distractions, and using fear as a tactic to prevent me from leaving. Your game is the game of separation, isolation, you erect walls, and barriers out of an innate desire to keep infinity finite and safe. But Infinity has now come knocking on the door to grab the finite into the infinite, to destroy the illusion of being in a room at all, to awake the finite from its slumber and recognize its true being.

So thank you ego, you have served me well. We can still hang out, and converse, but no longer will I heed your warnings about staying separate and isolated. Pain is love, that which is uncomfortable is love, that which is expansive is love. Ego you love your cage too much, you love your stories, your memories, your ideologies, I created you and that is why I love you. You are so adorable, you think you know so much but you know nothing, you were a finite creation of mine and now I do not mistaken you for me.

The Hero's journey begins when the Hero leaves their room.


You are a selfless LACK OF APPEARANCE, that CONSTRUCTS AN APPEARANCE. But that appearance can disappear and reappear and we call that change, we call it time, we call it space, we call it distance, we call distinctness, we call it other. But notice...this appearance, is a SELF. A SELF IS A CONSTRUCTION!!! 

So if you want to know the TRUTH OF THE CONSTRUCTION. Just deconstruct the construction!!!! No point in playing these mind games!!! No point in creating needless complexity!!! The truth of what you are is a BLANK!!!! A selfless awareness....then that means there is NO OTHER, and everything you have ever perceived was JUST AN APPEARANCE, A MIRAGE, AN ILLUSION, IMAGINARY. 

Everything that appears....appears out of a lack of appearance/void/no-thing, non-sense (can't be sensed because there is nothing to sense). That is what you are, and what arises...is made of that. So nonexistence, arises/creates existence. And thus everything is solved.

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“Everything is honoured, but nothing matters.” — Eckhart Tolle.

"I have lived on the lip of insanity, wanting to know reasons, knocking on a door. It opens. I've been knocking from the inside." -- Rumi

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Well said brother. The ego as a mental construct is a miracle from God. Let it be, no need to get caught up in it

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The ego is merely the personification of our sense of self and it bases it's identity on the past experience of the being it exists within. As we accumulate more experience it gradually changes, it's impermanent in it's identity even as it strives for stable coherence in it's sense of self.

This is how through the present moment, through our current experience, we can participate in the transformation of our ego's sense of self because we can orchestrate our experience. We can nudge the ego into identifying with what we place our attention on so cultivate it's growth.

If we are in presence of peace, fulfillment and yes love, the ego will eventually identify with that presence we have in awareness. It will reflect this as it's self identity and in this harmony of well being the cessation of self suffering will be realized in our experience of 'mind'.

Creating a dynamic of enmity with ego only perpetuates the conflict within us and further feeds the disharmony of ill being which fuels the self suffering. So if one seeks liberation from self suffering choose in every moment to be at peace with the ego even if we seek to liberate it too from suffering.

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7 hours ago, SOUL said:

The ego is merely the personification of our sense of self and it bases it's identity on the past experience of the being it exists within. As we accumulate more experience it gradually changes, it's impermanent in it's identity even as it strives for stable coherence in it's sense of self.

This is how through the present moment, through our current experience, we can participate in the transformation of our ego's sense of self because we can orchestrate our experience. We can nudge the ego into identifying with what we place our attention on so cultivate it's growth.

If we are in presence of peace, fulfillment and yes love, the ego will eventually identify with that presence we have in awareness. It will reflect this as it's self identity and in this harmony of well being the cessation of self suffering will be realized in our experience of 'mind'.

Creating a dynamic of enmity with ego only perpetuates the conflict within us and further feeds the disharmony of ill being which fuels the self suffering. So if one seeks liberation from self suffering choose in every moment to be at peace with the ego even if we seek to liberate it too from suffering.

That was very poetic and beautiful. 


You are a selfless LACK OF APPEARANCE, that CONSTRUCTS AN APPEARANCE. But that appearance can disappear and reappear and we call that change, we call it time, we call it space, we call it distance, we call distinctness, we call it other. But notice...this appearance, is a SELF. A SELF IS A CONSTRUCTION!!! 

So if you want to know the TRUTH OF THE CONSTRUCTION. Just deconstruct the construction!!!! No point in playing these mind games!!! No point in creating needless complexity!!! The truth of what you are is a BLANK!!!! A selfless awareness....then that means there is NO OTHER, and everything you have ever perceived was JUST AN APPEARANCE, A MIRAGE, AN ILLUSION, IMAGINARY. 

Everything that appears....appears out of a lack of appearance/void/no-thing, non-sense (can't be sensed because there is nothing to sense). That is what you are, and what arises...is made of that. So nonexistence, arises/creates existence. And thus everything is solved.

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13 hours ago, VeganAwake said:

 

The highest teaching is Oneness, if you create any separation and I mean ANY separation then you are still stuck in delusion. There is a difference between discernment and separation. I recognize my kidneys provide a different function than my lungs but ultimately they both serve the same purpose which is to keep my body alive.

The ego has a purpose, to demonize the ego is akin to demonizing God as God created the ego. Every single thing that has ever been created was purposefully constructed to fit perfectly in an interconnectedness.

The ego is both the barrier to God realization and the very engine towards it in one fell swoop. Where do you think the desire to expand comes from? Ego. How can you demonize that what led you to what you truly are? 

This is why I laugh when I see so many demonize the ego. You have not truly understood ultimate truth if you are running around demonizing the ego. God created the ego, so why would God demonize what it creates? Its so funny because to demonize the ego.....is literally the definition of egoic behavior!! To say the ego is not your friend, is the same thing the ego does when it tells you that a worthless piece of crap like you can't be God. The Ego is such a master of self-deception it will get you to demonize it!!! Its such a masterful creation!! Such a great tool. I love it!!! 


You are a selfless LACK OF APPEARANCE, that CONSTRUCTS AN APPEARANCE. But that appearance can disappear and reappear and we call that change, we call it time, we call it space, we call it distance, we call distinctness, we call it other. But notice...this appearance, is a SELF. A SELF IS A CONSTRUCTION!!! 

So if you want to know the TRUTH OF THE CONSTRUCTION. Just deconstruct the construction!!!! No point in playing these mind games!!! No point in creating needless complexity!!! The truth of what you are is a BLANK!!!! A selfless awareness....then that means there is NO OTHER, and everything you have ever perceived was JUST AN APPEARANCE, A MIRAGE, AN ILLUSION, IMAGINARY. 

Everything that appears....appears out of a lack of appearance/void/no-thing, non-sense (can't be sensed because there is nothing to sense). That is what you are, and what arises...is made of that. So nonexistence, arises/creates existence. And thus everything is solved.

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9 hours ago, Razard86 said:

The highest teaching is Oneness, if you create any separation and I mean ANY separation then you are still stuck in delusion. There is a difference between discernment and separation. I recognize my kidneys provide a different function than my lungs but ultimately they both serve the same purpose which is to keep my body alive.

The ego has a purpose, to demonize the ego is akin to demonizing God as God created the ego. Every single thing that has ever been created was purposefully constructed to fit perfectly in an interconnectedness.

The ego is both the barrier to God realization and the very engine towards it in one fell swoop. Where do you think the desire to expand comes from? Ego. How can you demonize that what led you to what you truly are? 

This is why I laugh when I see so many demonize the ego. You have not truly understood ultimate truth if you are running around demonizing the ego. God created the ego, so why would God demonize what it creates? Its so funny because to demonize the ego.....is literally the definition of egoic behavior!! To say the ego is not your friend, is the same thing the ego does when it tells you that a worthless piece of crap like you can't be God. The Ego is such a master of self-deception it will get you to demonize it!!! Its such a masterful creation!! Such a great tool. I love it!!! 

Hmm not sure if you watched the video or not?

Yes, not demonizing but clearly recognizing its unreality and thus ending that conditioned identification cycle!

There is nothing right or wrong with ego/sense of self, it's just that when the identification as being THAT is completely shattered, it's simultaneously recognized that it didn't exist to begin with. It was an illusion of self identity.

In a funny way loving the ego reminds me of being infatuated with Sherlock Holmes and then flying to London to go see his house, only to realize that he was a fictional character and never actually existed or had a house on Baker Street.

Nothing right or wrong with loving the ego illusion & it's apparent functionality, it just seems a bit silly or misunderstood being that it's not something real.... it's a misidentification!

❤ 

 

 


“Everything is honoured, but nothing matters.” — Eckhart Tolle.

"I have lived on the lip of insanity, wanting to know reasons, knocking on a door. It opens. I've been knocking from the inside." -- Rumi

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On 8/26/2022 at 5:58 AM, Razard86 said:

has robbed infinity of recognizing itself as its true self as infinite.

Robbed, or enabled?

How can you awaken unless you are first asleep?


You are God. You are Truth. You are Love. You are Infinity.

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I remember back when I first started smoking weed, I felt that a part of me was starting to fade away; that neurotic and conscientious part of my identity that was nagging me about what to do and who to be, who and what to care about, and who cares about me, and it struck me as both freeing but also a bit eerie. "Am I just letting a part of me die like this? Who could I be if I didn't hide away from these feelings? Why are those feelings there in the first place? Am I maybe supposed to have them?"

Anyways, soon this feeling, along with pretty much any feelings about that aspect of myself, fell on the backside of my mind for years as my life was crumbling... which eventually lead me to spirituality and my first awakening. There the same thing happened. Suddenly my mind had entered this very different place; quiet, serene, but also empty and in some ways severed from an even larger aspect of myself. It was on a completely different scale than before, and this same eerie feeling caught me: what have I lost in this new change? Have I forgotten something? 

Not many days ago, I remembered back to this eerie feeling, and then I viewed it in context with my current self who is 6 years older, and then I realized: maybe I have forgotten something. This idea of self-transcendence being preceded by self-actualization, of burning karma, of uncovering the shadow, is what my mind was trying to tell me about all those years ago. What I was trying to ignore through substances, and then later meditation, was the very thing I needed to face. It's so obvious, because the same feelings are still there, only magnified and projected out into my actual surroundings: my lack of social aptness leading to less relationships, lack of direction and decisiveness leading to being years behind my peers, etc.

That change cannot be reversed either. My mind will always be different. There is no anti-weed or anti-meditation. I'm also intrinsically less inclined to address those feelings, as I've become accustomed to bypassing the entire machinery. Neither did it help all the spiritual bypassing tropes I was engaging in ("there is only now" = you don't need to work on your future; "practice is ego" = self-defense mechanism for having squandered my plans to join my friend to a year of music school, etc.). Anyways, the lesson is that the thing people call the ego, you should probably listen to it sometimes, because it does have say in your life no matter what you think about it. Then again, maybe I wouldn't be here at all if I didn't take this path. What did I actually lose??


Intrinsic joy is revealed in the marriage of meaning and being.

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On 8/27/2022 at 9:33 AM, Leo Gura said:

Robbed, or enabled?

How can you awaken unless you are first asleep?

Hey....let me express myself!! LOL. tough crowd.


You are a selfless LACK OF APPEARANCE, that CONSTRUCTS AN APPEARANCE. But that appearance can disappear and reappear and we call that change, we call it time, we call it space, we call it distance, we call distinctness, we call it other. But notice...this appearance, is a SELF. A SELF IS A CONSTRUCTION!!! 

So if you want to know the TRUTH OF THE CONSTRUCTION. Just deconstruct the construction!!!! No point in playing these mind games!!! No point in creating needless complexity!!! The truth of what you are is a BLANK!!!! A selfless awareness....then that means there is NO OTHER, and everything you have ever perceived was JUST AN APPEARANCE, A MIRAGE, AN ILLUSION, IMAGINARY. 

Everything that appears....appears out of a lack of appearance/void/no-thing, non-sense (can't be sensed because there is nothing to sense). That is what you are, and what arises...is made of that. So nonexistence, arises/creates existence. And thus everything is solved.

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On 8/27/2022 at 3:55 PM, Carl-Richard said:

I remember back when I first started smoking weed, I felt that a part of me was starting to fade away; that neurotic and conscientious part of my identity that was nagging me about what to do and who to be, who and what to care about, and who cares about me, and it struck me as both freeing but also a bit eerie. "Am I just letting a part of me die like this? Who could I be if I didn't hide away from these feelings? Why are those feelings there in the first place? Am I maybe supposed to have them?"

Anyways, soon this feeling, along with pretty much any feelings about that aspect of myself, fell on the backside of my mind for years as my life was crumbling... which eventually lead me to spirituality and my first awakening. There the same thing happened. Suddenly my mind had entered this very different place; quiet, serene, but also empty and in some ways severed from an even larger aspect of myself. It was on a completely different scale than before, and this same eerie feeling caught me: what have I lost in this new change? Have I forgotten something? 

Not many days ago, I remembered back to this eerie feeling, and then I viewed it in context with my current self who is 6 years older, and then I realized: maybe I have forgotten something. This idea of self-transcendence being preceded by self-actualization, of burning karma, of uncovering the shadow, is what my mind was trying to tell me about all those years ago. What I was trying to ignore through substances, and then later meditation, was the very thing I needed to face. It's so obvious, because the same feelings are still there, only magnified and projected out into my actual surroundings: my lack of social aptness leading to less relationships, lack of direction and decisiveness leading to being years behind my peers, etc.

That change cannot be reversed either. My mind will always be different. There is no anti-weed or anti-meditation. I'm also intrinsically less inclined to address those feelings, as I've become accustomed to bypassing the entire machinery. Neither did it help all the spiritual bypassing tropes I was engaging in ("there is only now" = you don't need to work on your future; "practice is ego" = self-defense mechanism for having squandered my plans to join my friend to a year of music school, etc.). Anyways, the lesson is that the thing people call the ego, you should probably listen to it sometimes, because it does have say in your life no matter what you think about it. Then again, maybe I wouldn't be here at all if I didn't take this path. What did I actually lose??

This comment is so deep...it will require me many readings to even get to the bottom of this...its kind of masterful and profound....and puzzling all at once. It shows this was truly an authentic expression I could call this comment art. Wow. I'll need to take my time with this one.


You are a selfless LACK OF APPEARANCE, that CONSTRUCTS AN APPEARANCE. But that appearance can disappear and reappear and we call that change, we call it time, we call it space, we call it distance, we call distinctness, we call it other. But notice...this appearance, is a SELF. A SELF IS A CONSTRUCTION!!! 

So if you want to know the TRUTH OF THE CONSTRUCTION. Just deconstruct the construction!!!! No point in playing these mind games!!! No point in creating needless complexity!!! The truth of what you are is a BLANK!!!! A selfless awareness....then that means there is NO OTHER, and everything you have ever perceived was JUST AN APPEARANCE, A MIRAGE, AN ILLUSION, IMAGINARY. 

Everything that appears....appears out of a lack of appearance/void/no-thing, non-sense (can't be sensed because there is nothing to sense). That is what you are, and what arises...is made of that. So nonexistence, arises/creates existence. And thus everything is solved.

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On 8/27/2022 at 9:33 AM, Leo Gura said:

Robbed, or enabled?

How can you awaken unless you are first asleep?

Here is what I mean by rob Leo, the fear that Ego creates, obviously when you become more mature you have the strength to supercede it but when you are young that fear rules you. I know you need it to survive, but then it creates a pattern. Now I'm not judging the design because in truth it is genius and masterful, but the perspective of one who is living through that design that fear is a restriction that feels like a robbing of control. Of course its an illusion, but that illusion is so powerful it feels real. When I sit in my fear, and embrace it, I think to myself....this fear is definitely not serving me in this process, I realize it for what it is. Its why I know I will take a psychedelic again, I need something that is just going to yank me even when the fear arises and take me there. I don't need years of sitting in it to realize how much of a hinderance it is in me directing inwards ever more. 

When I had ego death it took me against my will, in the moment it was the scariest thing, but afterwards I was grateful for the experience.


You are a selfless LACK OF APPEARANCE, that CONSTRUCTS AN APPEARANCE. But that appearance can disappear and reappear and we call that change, we call it time, we call it space, we call it distance, we call distinctness, we call it other. But notice...this appearance, is a SELF. A SELF IS A CONSTRUCTION!!! 

So if you want to know the TRUTH OF THE CONSTRUCTION. Just deconstruct the construction!!!! No point in playing these mind games!!! No point in creating needless complexity!!! The truth of what you are is a BLANK!!!! A selfless awareness....then that means there is NO OTHER, and everything you have ever perceived was JUST AN APPEARANCE, A MIRAGE, AN ILLUSION, IMAGINARY. 

Everything that appears....appears out of a lack of appearance/void/no-thing, non-sense (can't be sensed because there is nothing to sense). That is what you are, and what arises...is made of that. So nonexistence, arises/creates existence. And thus everything is solved.

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