Weed causing sudden trauma release

[Alta]

I've been smoking weed for 2 years now, and been using it for personal development and introspection, and I have never tried to work on my traumas on weed, cuz it wasn't obvious to me as if I had any lingering traumas or not, even though at some point in my childhood there was traumatic events. So yesterday I smoked weed and wasnt expecting to get so high, but it was easy to manage it, and as usual I was working high on my music, until suddenly I started feeling funny and open to everything that was going through my mind, and for some reason that traumatic event came into my mind in which my life was threatened as a child. For my whole life this event wasnt concerning me, and seemingly didnt effect my in any way (I thought so at least). While remembering the whole thing I ''battled'' the resistence that I felt with ease and it was going so smooth, I felt very warm in my chest and full of love for myself. For me weed sometimes causes some weird thoughts which I would brush off as high thoughts, but during that experience I decided to let all of my emotions and thoughts to be and accept them, and the pinnacle of that experience was when I told myself "I love myself, even if this situation happened''. Im just confused what happened and why? Someone said on this forum that trauma release happens on its own when our psychological well being is ready for that, and it seems that it is the case. Out of all my smoking sessions this one felt so lovely and calm. 
Now that I'm sober I try to think of some other traumatic events and feel the same as usual - just nothing
Notably during this week I've been ''resting'' in my awareness and the more I did it the more connected I felt. 
I want to undestand the topic of trauma better, I'll be thankful for any help. much love

[Asayake]

8 hours ago, Alta said:

I felt very warm in my chest and full of love for myself.

Maybe this was the recognition of your deeper self, which is infinite love, acceptance of yourself and whatever happens. At the deepest layer of who you are is the love for yourself and what is, in other words consciousness itself, which is already loving, accepting of everything that is and thereby also everything that has happened or will happen, including the traumatic event in the past or any hardship you will face in the future.

This is always the case but under the influence of weed and other psychedelics like LSD it can be easier to become conscious that it is this way. On LSD for example the ego death can be quite traumatic in a sense, the body thinks it's dying, the heart is beating fast, it's uncomfortable, and in the midst of the body and minds resistance to what's happening the deeper self 'reveals' itself. You realize you're there for yourself no matter what and that you love yourself completely and that this has always been the case and that you just didn't see it was this way before. But now you see it and it fills your heart with love, love is the only word that does it justice. And even when it feels like things are going to crap or you're in a dangerous close call situation like your traumatic event when you were young, you're there for yourself in the most caring way that you can be. Maybe by recalling this traumatic event this was realized by you, but not yet on the intellectual level. But you could FEEL the true nature of your being.

Edited July 10, 2022 by Asayake

[Alta]

@Asayake Thanks for the response. Trying to unveil my own lifestory is so tricky, the mind is SO tricky, I've been numb to emotions for the most of my life and its my way of being, my thoughts is the most frequent place I go to, but the moment I took shrooms everything flipped. My heart was full of love for every damn thing, emotions were so clear and navigating, but because I 'practiced' thinking so much, my logical thinking wasnt affected at all, so its probably all combined into a very pleasent experience