Vido

I went to a club to ask people out

15 posts in this topic

It's scary. However, I managed to open a girl and ask something but I immediately noticed my problem for the love of God (aka me to not offend the enlightened ones) I can't figure out

 

How to develop a masculine edge? I feel when I talk to all people, it's very high energy as in charismatic, charming, etc. But not dark, sexy, I wanna fuck this dude, energy?

 

I am trying to develop a lower-body masculine edge where women would put me in the category of I wanna sleep with this dude rather than this feels like my younger brother kinda energy?

 

Any practical tips?

 

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Dark energy? lol you don't have to be dark. Just grounded and comfortable. If you're scared, they can sense that and be 'nice' but not attracted

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@Vido How is your lower body awareness?

I noticed that whenever I would visit escorts I would feel intense anxiety in the stomach. And I am very disassociated from my lower body sensations. I'm still struggling with this, but I'm learning to feel more into my lower body and I think that's where mastery of sexualty comes from.

You could also look up people who display the kind of energy/sexual intent you want to embody and practice acting like them. You can "Act as if" you are that person on your own. 

5 minutes ago, Vido said:

I am trying to develop a lower-body masculine edge where women would put me in the category of I wanna sleep with this dude rather than this feels like my younger brother kinda energy?

 

This is a good insight I think. Woman can sense your masculinity and i've had a few woman make comments about me being too young/childish and I think it's because I don't have control over my lower body energies.

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@Raptorsin7 I am good at feeling my energy, but I don't very intensely desire women or haven't seen many people around me be that way. I was born in india and now in canada. So in india, you rarely ask women out since its taboo, here, I feel there is a dance people play that I never learnt at all

 

Like rather than saying quickly "HEY! I Just saw you and and I found you pretty..hhmmm and here I am hahaha 9_9"

people go like: "Hey...how are youB|"

boom done

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@Vido I'm Indian too, but I was born in Canada. If you have the money I recommend getting some kind of mentorship or coaching for dating.

An Indian upbringing is a recipe for being repellant to woman imo

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I took, dont get me wrong, I feel like I don't belong in the club in the first place.

However, he skill of masculine edge, I find some of my friends in india who got laid a lot also had, but it's super tough to articulate RIP

 

where in canada btw? I live in windsor, near toronto

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@Vido I live in Burnaby, BC. 

Maybe you learn a martial art, or find some other form of competition. Being victorious and experiencing the glory of winning can be good for developing a masculine edge I think.

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A good way to develop masculine edge is by doing things that are scary to you, trying new things, and by pushing boundaries

Which you’re already doing by the sounds of it :D

You actually don’t need that ‘dark energy’ to attract girls, being fun and playful is good, as long as you still lead the interaction

 

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Pretty simple really:

Talk way less, do deep eye contact, and everything you say and do as you approach should be coming from a direct sexual intent. You are not there to chit-chat or be funny, you are there looking for your dream girl, and once you see her that is the frame for the whole interaction.

Deep eye contact.

Less talk.

Powerful and clear intent.

Make her feel that this is something different than empty, airheaded social chatter.


You are God. You are Truth. You are Love. You are Infinity.

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@Vido  It's not a skill.

It's a shedding of outer layers.

Trying to incorporate it as a skill, something you 'add', will just lead to more fakery that girls will not trust.

Your high-energy persona is fake.

This has to be seen.

There is something deeper behind it, something that was unacceptable in the past.

But it is there.

It's always there.

So stop trying to add things.

Start listening to your body.

Especially your gut and underbelly.

Breathe deeply into your belly, this is essential.

Many people can't even do this, so pay extra attention to your breath.

When do you feel strong/when do you feel weak, when you say things?

To become authentic, you will have to say a lot of things that you expect to be shamed for.

The high-energy "charismatic" persona (I have one too - quite painful to think about) probably feels like you're in your head, tension around your head.

No feeling the lower body.

It says "Please accept me, please accept me"

And that's what others feel when you talk to them.

Say things that you are afraid to be unaccepted for, while breathing deeply.

Experience that that is safe.

If that as an exercise works for you, great.

You might want to add some shadow work to that practice.

 

Edited by flowboy

Learn to resolve trauma. Together.

Testimonials thread: www.actualized.org/forum/topic/82672-experience-collection-childhood-aware-life-purpose-coaching/

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@Vido

Canada is a tough spot to meet women imo. I’ve traveled the world and met women from literally everywhere and I have to be honest, they seem to really be the most closed off and not tapped into their femininity. Also a bit of bitterness towards men. No red pill incel shit this is just my honest obseervation of Canadian women. 
 

That said, when tapping into your masculinity you need to drop the lovey high vibe nice guy thing. It’s def conscious but it’s not attractive, most women will find this feminine and repulsive. 
 

just look at it as an interaction.  It’s so simple. You’re a man she’s a woman. You guys both like sex. Start talking and let nature run it’s course. Don’t get discouraged by rejection or if she acts weird. Be bulletproof in that manner, embrace rejection, revel in it. 
 

do day game, clubs are bullshit. Also try to find women into spirituality 

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21 minutes ago, BlessedLion said:

@Vido

Canada is a tough spot to meet women imo. I’ve traveled the world and met women from literally everywhere and I have to be honest, they seem to really be the most closed off and not tapped into their femininity. Also a bit of bitterness towards men. No red pill incel shit this is just my honest obseervation of Canadian women. 
 

That said, when tapping into your masculinity you need to drop the lovey high vibe nice guy thing. It’s def conscious but it’s not attractive, most women will find this feminine and repulsive. 
 

just look at it as an interaction.  It’s so simple. You’re a man she’s a woman. You guys both like sex. Start talking and let nature run it’s course. Don’t get discouraged by rejection or if she acts weird. Be bulletproof in that manner, embrace rejection, revel in it. 
 

do day game, clubs are bullshit. Also try to find women into spirituality 

Thanks man

 

I will do day game def

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On 5.7.2022 at 8:00 AM, Leo Gura said:

@Leo Gura

Pretty simple really:

Talk way less, do deep eye contact, and everything you say and do as you approach should be coming from a direct sexual intent. You are not there to chit-chat or be funny, you are there looking for your dream girl, and once you see her that is the frame for the whole interaction.

Deep eye contact.

Less talk.

Powerful and clear intent.

Make her feel that this is something different than empty, airheaded social chatter.

ohh, I thought you should talk as much as possible til you reached hook point? 

Edited by JTL

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hey it's called practicing pickup :) there is a lot of discussion on this forum ?

there's no magic pill. interact with women a lot and learn how to love yourself and develop inner confidence. 

 

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