yetineti

Love Triangle/Not knowing what I want

4 posts in this topic

Hi, long story short in a bit of a ‘love triangle.’

My friend has like this girl for awhile and her and I recently hit it off and he got very upset at the idea of it. 
 

The girl doesn’t seem interested in him even though he has tried in the past. I don’t know if I want something with her or not.

Bit I don’t like being told who I can and can’t try with, ya know. Also hate being a dick and feel like I am, here’s why.

I am very inexperienced with girls. I don’t talk to many, I don’t know much of what I want from them. 
 

So I don’t want to pursue her if I end up not like her, consequently just being a dick to my friend. But I also don’t want to hold back at least trying with a girl to figure out what I like.

I know a lot of this is, talk to more girls! Find what I like! But has anyone been in a situation like this?

Do we all need to start with a sort of ‘sluttly’ (not slutty, but quantity approach) with women? Or how do you introverts make collected decisions on who to go for, when you don’t know what you like?

Probably a combo of both- just thinking about preferences but then, obviously, more experiences with women to really know.

Thanks.

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This depends on how much you value your relationship and what kind of relationship you have with your friend.

3 things to consider 

1) There are plenty of potential women out there for you. 2) you and this girl could be a good fit for each other. 3) Women freewill.

Is it possible for you to just hang out with this girl without doing anything you can't come back from? and at the same time, It's not like its your friend's ex.

47 minutes ago, mw711 said:

Do we all need to start with a sort of ‘sluttly’ (not slutty, but quantity approach) with women? Or how do you introverts make collected decisions on who to go for, when you don’t know what you like?

This depends on what your long-term goal with girls is and what you want from them, y'know? 

I think you need to be yourself. Forget what we all need or what introverts need, what does @mw711 need?

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@SgtPepper I’m in such a sophistic frame right now- 

2 hours ago, SgtPepper said:

I think you need to be yourself. Forget what we all need or what introverts need, what does @mw711 need?

But you’re right; fuck, who am I, again?

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@SgtPepper As far as the ‘ 1, 2, 3’ 

1. I wish I wouldn’t have picked this username- just kidding

actually (in response)

1. Yes, billions of women. Unimaginable, somewhat. There’s someone, if not many ‘viabilities.’ 

2. I genuinely have no idea if we’re a good fit. Very little experience with women. Always had some good look female friends though. Haven’t been super social lately, but it’s not like I can’t. Also, yes, few experiences that weren’t ‘good.’ Then there’s a weird perspective, my parents relationship is/was wacko and unhealthy. Not much first hand experience of affectionate, interpersonal, Love.

3. I don’t know what could happen with this girl bit I know I am very close to this friend. Weighing the consequences, yes. Enjoyed your phrasing of ‘anything you can’t come back from.’ I know that I could and I know other than jealously for a bit no other response could be really warranted but I fear a greater response. I’d understand a greater response, justified or not. 
 

Weighing the consequences.

Right now I talk to her a bit daily and see her every now and then, not really making any moves. Just trying to feel my thoughts with her.

I know it’s not the best strategy to lead on or not make any moves but- ‘in a pickle.’

Im, 20- honestly think good, long term, intimate relationships start after 30, usually, though. 
 

Check the stats, don’t know, that’s what sounded good to me, anyways.

 

 

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