Judy2

How can i make intrusive thoughts stop?

43 posts in this topic

11 hours ago, Judy2 said:

@WelcometoReality I'm scared of being wrong, as in, being a bad person.

How would you be wrong or bad? Does a bad person act in a certain way? 

I know I'm asking alot of questions but it's just to get into the core belief.

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@WelcometoReality I guess the core belief is that something's wrong with me. Then the rest is me debating whether or not this is true, and it's one endless, exhausting debate.

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2 hours ago, Judy2 said:

@WelcometoReality I guess the core belief is that something's wrong with me. Then the rest is me debating whether or not this is true, and it's one endless, exhausting debate.

I've had that belief too. I was constantly looking for what was wrong with me, searching for personality disorders that I could have. 

The relief came when I started to question that belief. 

The truth is you are who you are and there's nothing wrong with you. Not that me writing  this will help to get rid of the belief. You need to go deeper.

You can do it yourself. Write down everything you think is wrong and then question every statement you wrote. What is wrong and what is right? What is a good person and what is a bad person. Are those statements actually true?

Where have you learned that this was the case? 

This might come down values you inherited from your parents or the collective unconscious. 

If you need any help feel free to pm me. ?

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You can't. First of all, the assumption that there is a separate entity called "you" is wrong. Second, thinking is a function of the conceptualization ability that humans posses. So how could someone that doesn't exist change it's thinking? 

This is not to say, the it isn't possible to change the patterns of thinking. The thoughts that are generated are patterns, and can be changed over time using different methods or practices. For example, the use mantras to flood the mind with a repeated thought pattern. But no one is really doing it - it is just a thought that "I have negative thoughts. They affect me negatively. I must find a way to change this. I heard about mantras. I AM LOVE, I AM WILL, I AM BEAUTY, I AM...". It is just the thinking process going on producing more thoughts that are considered as a future possibility to improve the experience.

There are other options - rooting the entire process by becoming conscious that no thought is true, it is only a conceptual mimic of voice which has no reality to it. Additionally, the process can be rooted by becoming conscious that no one is producing the thoughts, they just appear without volition. It is more like an automated function of the brain organ, that creates the illusion that there is an ethereal entity residing inside the body that is "you" and is the one who is doing the thinking, seeing, hearing, smelling, sensing, tasting. Becoming conscious that there is no "you" or a "thinker" will dissolve much of the attachment to thinking, and the belief that it has any reality to it. It will be obvious that thoughts just occur but has no significance or owner to them. 

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@Batman I most definitely understand what nonduality means conceptually, but it's not like the thought "I'm not actually there" changed the severity of the situation. I can't just snap my fingers and become enlightened, so instead i am trying to find other solutions to ease my suffering when it gets too much. 

 

@WelcometoReality I'll pm you:)

 

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1. Reduce anxiety. Anxiety makes intrusive thoughts worse. Destress and reduce anxiety through diet and meditation/yoga/walking, whatever works. This may reduce the frequency or severity level of your thoughts.

2. Practice just letting them be there, and let them pass like storm clouds. Again through meditation, sitting, walking. 

3. Write your thoughts down.

4. Gratitude journal.

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@ZenAlex Thanks:) i agree that all of the above can be helpful!

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@Judy2 RE the breath, try dropping your attention into your body, and simply allow your body to breathe - don't try to force or control it in any way, the keyword is allowing. You might feel temporarily worse as your body starts to relax and what had previously been repressed starts arise, and your mind might also become busier in an unconscious attempt to try and cope with the arising of anxious feelings, but just keep allowing your body to breathe. Patience and persistence is key, change isn't likely to happen overnight.

It can feel overwhelming though, and sometimes it's practically impossible to sit with these feelings - I suffered with severe anxiety a few years back, and I found that just going for a walk could help, as you mentioned, as could noticing a particular area of tension in my body - that was usually my gut or solar plexus - and then mindfully stretching and breathing into the area (yoga helped massively). What I came to realize about anxiety is that it's what happens when energy is trying to move within you but it's coming up against blockages in the body, and so those blockages have to be dissolved so the energy can move - this is where bodywork becomes very important. It can be a very intense and drawn out process though, so it does require patience and discipline.


'When you look outside yourself for something to make you feel complete, you never get to know the fullness of your essential nature.' - Amoda Maa Jeevan

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@RickyFitts Okay I'll definitely give the breathing exercises a go.

And walks work really well for me, too.

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@Judy2 Great, good luck with it. ? Yeah, walking can work wonders in relieving tension I've found.


'When you look outside yourself for something to make you feel complete, you never get to know the fullness of your essential nature.' - Amoda Maa Jeevan

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@Judy2 You're very welcome, and may you find some relief, because I know just how terribly challenging it can be. ❤


'When you look outside yourself for something to make you feel complete, you never get to know the fullness of your essential nature.' - Amoda Maa Jeevan

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On 5/21/2022 at 7:55 AM, Judy2 said:

I didn't really notice i was struggling with this until recently.

When it starts, i can't focus on anything else, my body gets tense, and it takes a while until i get out of that state. It feels like the thoughts aren't mine.

What can i do to prevent this from happening or to make it go away?

I heard that there must be some suppressed emotion in the background and so the pressure builds up and manifests as excessive thoughts on a given issue, e.g. agression as thoughts that you need to be violent and hit someone even though you normally wouldn't have such ideas. I'd generally consider myself to be extremely well in touch with my emotions and have tried to find a few possible explanations for what's going on. However, being aware of this doesn't actually make it stop...and the harder you try not to think of it, the more intense it gets.

This advice is not easy, but what about just letting it be there, not in a worry about it way, not in a looking at it in hopes it goes away, not in a breathing in hopes you feel better way, just letting it be the way it is and carrying on.

It really doesn't "mean" anything for nasty thoughts and dis-ease in the body to occur exactly the way it is.  What if it was objectively perfect being uncomfortable?  

You ever have allergies that are unpleasant?  Not so bad right (i dont know, maybe they are for you), perhaps if you look at what ever it is that is bothering you in the way you accept allergies (or something similar) being unpleasant, maybe you can allow those nasty things to just be there.  This is much easier said than done.

Give it a shot.

And sure sometimes its good to treat the body with what it needs, like a bath or massage or meditation to relax.  It can get uncomfortable this body thing.

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Posted (edited)

4 hours ago, Mu_ said:

It can get uncomfortable this body thing.

Ain't that the truth. xD I think it's helpful to understand that it's an inside job, that we create the discomfort and unease for ourselves. And there's no blame in that, because it's an unconscious habit we've developed out of fear, our bodies have just learnt from a young age to contract and hold themselves in because we've been told that it's not all right to be the way we are. But we can take back our power by giving ourselves permission to release what's been held in (just, y'know, don't release it in someone's face).

Edited by RickyFitts

'When you look outside yourself for something to make you feel complete, you never get to know the fullness of your essential nature.' - Amoda Maa Jeevan

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8 hours ago, RickyFitts said:

Ain't that the truth. xD I think it's helpful to understand that it's an inside job, that we create the discomfort and unease for ourselves. And there's no blame in that, because it's an unconscious habit we've developed out of fear, our bodies have just learnt from a young age to contract and hold themselves in because we've been told that it's not all right to be the way we are. But we can take back our power by giving ourselves permission to release what's been held in (just, y'know, don't release it in someone's face).

And sometimes some stuff we can't "release" everything, and its just going to be the way it is, and acceptance plays a role here I believe.

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@Mu_ i appreciate your advice:) In theory it makes sense but things can get pretty tough when thoughts and feelings seem so real.

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7 hours ago, Mu_ said:

And sometimes some stuff we can't "release" everything, and its just going to be the way it is, and acceptance plays a role here I believe.

Where there's a will there's a way, though that doesn't mean it's easy. Depends how badly you really want to be free of these things, people are usually content just to cope.


'When you look outside yourself for something to make you feel complete, you never get to know the fullness of your essential nature.' - Amoda Maa Jeevan

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Posted (edited)

1 hour ago, RickyFitts said:

Where there's a will there's a way, though that doesn't mean it's easy. Depends how badly you really want to be free of these things, people are usually content just to cope.

@RickyFitts The fact that you need to bring up the will to let go is part of why it's so challenging. Because swimming against the tide takes tons of energy and makes the emotions you've been avoiding come to the surface. And sometimes you don't see the point in doing so...why would you wanna dive right into the guilt and shame and insecurities you've been avoiding so neatly for the past few years of your life? It takes a lot of strength, courage and faith that it's the right thing to do even if it won't feel right for a while.

Edited by Judy2

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5 hours ago, Judy2 said:

It takes a lot of strength, courage and faith that it's the right thing to do even if it won't feel right for a while.

Oh boy, isn't that the truth... comfortably the hardest thing I've ever done. 

6 hours ago, Judy2 said:

And sometimes you don't see the point in doing so...why would you wanna dive right into the guilt and shame and insecurities you've been avoiding so neatly for the past few years of your life?

Almost seems masochistic, doesn't it? I think you only really do it when you realise that you have no choice but to do so.


'When you look outside yourself for something to make you feel complete, you never get to know the fullness of your essential nature.' - Amoda Maa Jeevan

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