ThePoint

How can I stop being paranoid about everything?

14 posts in this topic

I'm paranoid about literally everything.

I think of the worst case scenario in literally every single situation. 

It's severely limiting me in my life.

When I talk to someone through messages I always consider the possibility that they could screenshot everything, take it way out of context, make a story, and put me to jail or prison.

This is possible but it's extremely unlikely, but my mind still keeps fucking fixating on the worst case scenario of everything.

I can't even talk to people normally because my mind keeps fixating on the possibility that they could use whatever I say against me at some point in the future if they develop a grudge towards me for whatever reason.

This feels like an actual illness. It's not me that's paranoid but my mind that's paranoid, it's causing me so much suffering. 

I also care a lot about what others think of me. I know logically that this isn't serving me BUT I STILL CARE ABOUT WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK OF ME! WHY THE FUCK DO I CARE ABOUT WHAT OTHERS THINK OF ME? IS THERE SOME SHADOW WORK THAT I NEED TO DO? SOME BOOK I SHOULD READ? WHAT SHOULD I DO? 

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Do you -

  • Drink alcohol?
  • Drink caffeine?
  • Drink energy drinks or anything else with stimulants?
  • Take drugs?
  • Get terrible sleep regularly?

I've had paranoid thoughts, and it approved my paranoia massively when I stopped drinking alcohol and caffeine.

If you do anything of the above, try changing these things. There's so much crap in people's diets. 

If none of the above apply to you, then go to a professional, because you may have paranoid personality disorder or this may be leading onto something more serious like schizophrenia. 

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22 hours ago, ZenAlex said:

Do you -

  • Drink alcohol?
    • No
  • Drink caffeine?
    • Very rarely. Maybe a few times a year. 
  • Drink energy drinks or anything else with stimulants?
    • No
  • Take drugs?
    • No
  • Get terrible sleep regularly?
    • My sleep never feels like quality sleep no longer how much I sleep. 

 

22 hours ago, ZenAlex said:

If none of the above apply to you, then go to a professional

What type of professional? 

 

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@ThePoint What is your media diet? 
ive been suffering and healing from a similar sense of anxiety over the year. I found that not having internet in my apartment has helped. 
 

Meditation can help, Qigong can help, journaling can help

Books like “Guide to Rational Living” contains cold for improving your cognitive behaviour… 

also, “Letting Go” by David R Hawkins 


"Every spark of friendship and love will die without a home...Hear the soldier grown 'We'll go it alone!'" Intervention -Arcade Fire 

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You have to change this belief, start by stopping affirming that you are paranoid. That's not true. You can say for example that you HAD some paranoid thoughts. With the verb tense in the past. That can be useful in your recovery and more aligned with the truth. Unless you are having thoughts at this exact moment. 

There are two possible dimensions in which fear can manifest. In your feelings, and in your thinking.

To heal your feelings, find a way to silence your mind (meditation) and turn your attention to the feeling of fear, anguish, or whatever feeling that may be present in your body. It can be clear or can be subtle, doesn't matter, do not rationalize about it. Just stay there with compassionate awareness, allowing and observing it for a period that is comfortable for you. You'll start to feel lighter after a while. 

To heal your thoughts, since you are already able to question the truth of these thoughts, you can, being kind to yourself, start reducing the impact it has on your actions. Recognizing that you can live and do whatever you want to do despite the threats. Take baby steps if necessary and take notes about your progress. That will make you improve on a regular basis. Find values like love, freedom, courage, or whatever you want to honor to support you in this process. I mean, it can be easier if you move on motivated for a higher purpose, compared to just wanting to "fix yourself". Make it all clear by writing.

Be patient and consistent. Be loving and head up! You'll be fine and become a more powerful and resilient person after growing from it.

Wish you the best!

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Posted (edited)

What does your mind think it’s getting out of the paranoia? Does it think that it can prevent whatever worst scenario it is imagining and then does it start to plan around it? Or does it believe that it is helpless to the scenario and just panics? It sounds like the latter by reading your description. But I’ve asked myself these questions relative to my issue with paranoia to help myself distinguish between what is worrying, anxiety, and straight paranoia. It’s good to gain awareness over what the mind is actually doing and what it is trying to get so we can provide ourself (our mind) with that thing in a way other than paranoia— so we can take proactive action for ourself. This is the self-loving thing we can do, “without love there is only pain.” Essentially our mind is agitating itself unconsciously and needs both our awareness and love desperately.

What it probably is/what your mind probably needs is safety and security. How can you give your mind a sense of security? We as paranoids do not know how to provide a sense of safety and security to ourselves. Which means we were never taught it. So we have to figure out how to nurture our mind. 
 

How can you make your mind feel safe? This is an essential need of the mind and without it this is what happens. 

Some things that helped me: 

1. My mind is agitated and is stuck in a cycle of agitating itself via paranoia. So when it is really severe it helps to feed it convincing thoughts of the opposite scenario of the paranoia— thoughts that actually convince me and that I can actually believe in, not thoughts that my mind think are bullshit. 
 

2. Realizing that the pain that comes with caring about what people think reflects the degree to which we value Connection. It could also reflect the degree to which we need connection. Reframing in this way helps to stop self-hating on caring about what people think and to consciously recognize the motivation behind it (this helps it feel more like a choice than a tendency). 
 

3. I would catch your ‘inner critic’ in the moment that it is criticizing you to get awareness and healing around it. Your inner critic is probably feeding the paranoia as well.

 

Hope this helps <3 

Edited by Gianna

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Posted (edited)

I think social media, Twitter mobs, mainstream media and politics, cancel culture has made me paranoid.

Im working on it. I think this is why sometimes I am extra disagreeable on purpose on the forum because I am tired of living in fear of peoples opinions.

I think that the more i identity with the whole of reality, hard truths, and multiple interpretations the more I can get in trouble with highly emotional and opinionated people. 

I think it may backfire if I’m not careful. 
 

There is a balance of not caring, and being healthily cautious I think. 

Edited by Thought Art

"Every spark of friendship and love will die without a home...Hear the soldier grown 'We'll go it alone!'" Intervention -Arcade Fire 

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I think some beautiful substances that can help with relaxing your mind would be a good place to start, along side with seeing a therapist. CBD calms the mind very nicely and well for me, some kind of thing like that

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Do you suffer bipolar/bpd?


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

Cleared out ignore list today. 

..

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Two books from the booklist could be especially interesting for your case in my opinion:

Tame your Gremlin and The Sedona Method

I think you need to learn to dont take this thoughts too seriously but rather recognize them and laugh about them. Also you should learn to letting go of these thoughts and feelings. Yeah I know its easier said than to be done, but I think these two books could help on the way. 

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Posted (edited)

On 5/12/2022 at 8:20 AM, ThePoint said:

I also care a lot about what others think of me. I know logically that this isn't serving me BUT I STILL CARE ABOUT WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK OF ME! WHY THE FUCK DO I CARE ABOUT WHAT OTHERS THINK OF ME? IS THERE SOME SHADOW WORK THAT I NEED TO DO? SOME BOOK I SHOULD READ? WHAT SHOULD I DO? 

The shadow work is focusing on your own goals and working towards achieving them.  The more of that you have in your life, the less you care about what others think of you.  You tend to care more about what others think of you when you are kind of adrift and don't have a strong sense of yourself and what you want to happen in your life.

(Oh, and try to fix your sleep problem - that's important.)

Edited by SeaMonster

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On 2022-05-12 at 2:20 PM, ThePoint said:

This feels like an actual illness. It's not me that's paranoid but my mind that's paranoid, it's causing me so much suffering. 

That's a good realization to have, you are not the thought but it comes from your conditioned body and mind. 

On the level of thought you can question these thoughts. Are they true? Are people not to be trusted? Have there been a time when people used information against you or where does this stem from?

On an emotional level what you can do is meet the fear. Despite being afraid you feel the fear fully while doing what scares you. Go easy on yourself and back off if you feel like it's becoming overwhelming. This dissolves the fear and it will start to feel easier and easier with time until it no longer feels like a problem anymore.

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