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How do you feel after masturbation?-poll

How do you feel after you masturbate?   62 members have voted

  1. 1. How do you feel after you masturbate?

    • sad
      2
    • Guilty
      7
    • Hopeless
      1
    • Worthless
      1
    • Tired
      11
    • Energized
      2
    • Relaxed
      28
    • Happy
      2
    • Confident
      1
    • Other: let me know In the comments
      7

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58 posts in this topic

I'm trying to gather a consensus of how people here feel after they masturbate. as I'm trying to figure out the perfect sexual life for me

For males specially. But women are welcome to voice their opinion too.

The poll is anonymous .Also pls comment about how you feel right after masturbation. 

Edited by Someone here

"life is not a problem to be solved ..its a mystery to be lived "

-Osho

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@Knowledge Hoarder good .so a mixture of contradicting feelings . Do you feel better and more stable in emotion now than when you used to fap a lot ? 

Any changes towards the better? 

Edited by Someone here

"life is not a problem to be solved ..its a mystery to be lived "

-Osho

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42 minutes ago, Knowledge Hoarder said:

I feel cleaner. And I feel my emotions more intensively than I used to - probably because I was numbing them throught masturbation. I wouldn't say I'm more stable though.

When I feel happy, I feel it really deeply, when I'm sad, I get really depressed. So it's a double edged sword.

I'm more aggressive and confrontational than I used to be. I can't tolerate things I used to tolerate.

I objectify women less than I used to.

Overall, my life hasn't changed that much.

How so?  Isn't that a contradiction?

 You say you feel more clean when you don't fap and you are more connected to your emotions. That's a step in the right direction. As you don't feel numbed down almost drugged from masturbating.  And then you say your life didn't change much . For me I consider that a hugh change .


"life is not a problem to be solved ..its a mystery to be lived "

-Osho

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37 minutes ago, Federico del pueblo said:

@Someone here

On top of feeling relaxed (which I voted for) I also feel satisfied, well-balanced, maybe confident (in a sexual way).

Weird .why do I feel like a flimsy piece of shit when I fap ?

I don't buy that it's all in my mind .I sense there is something physically harmful about masturbation.  

I can't be the only one who feels this way.


"life is not a problem to be solved ..its a mystery to be lived "

-Osho

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1 hour ago, Someone here said:

Weird .why do I feel like a flimsy piece of shit when I fap ?

I don't buy that it's all in my mind .I sense there is something physically harmful about masturbation.  

I can't be the only one who feels this way.

I don't know.

Anyway, I should have added that this only applies to pure masturbation without porn.

Porn is a different thing and masturbation + porn does indeed affect in me in weird ways that I can't control (and trust me I've tried to control it). After porn masturbation I can feel unworthy, insecure and just weirdly limited, no idea what that is.

So, if you've been masturbating with porn, cut that out, just use your imagination.

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2 hours ago, Someone here said:

Weird .why do I feel like a flimsy piece of shit when I fap ?

I don't buy that it's all in my mind .I sense there is something physically harmful about masturbation.  

I can't be the only one who feels this way.

I think if a person is stressed out and anxious. Masturbation can function as a stress relief and make a person feel more relaxed, somewhat sleepy, calm etc. And it gets associated with better mood and positive effects probably. 

In my opinion when only when a person who is not stressed out but exuberant, alive, vibrant and a in good state of mind by his own nature then he's going to experience big energy and motivation loss after ejaculation. But this may not be noticable from once in a week jerk off. But 2-3 times in a row would be a devastating experience imo.

Edited by Salvijus

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1 hour ago, Federico del pueblo said:

I don't know.

Anyway, I should have added that this only applies to pure masturbation without porn.

Porn is a different thing and masturbation + porn does indeed affect in me in weird ways that I can't control (and trust me I've tried to control it). After porn masturbation I can feel unworthy, insecure and just weirdly limited, no idea what that is.

So, if you've been masturbating with porn, cut that out, just use your imagination.

 Yes I know. Porn especially is extremely unhealthy. There is no question about it .its proven scientifically that it causes damage to the gray matter and the reward circuit in the brain. It causes brain fog and in some cases even erectile dysfunction.

However, masturbation is kinda mysterious to me ..I have yet to make up my mind about it .is it healthy or not ?

Would you say it's healthy if done without porn and in moderation? 

Edited by Someone here

"life is not a problem to be solved ..its a mystery to be lived "

-Osho

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21 minutes ago, Salvijus said:

I think if a person is stressed out and anxious. Masturbation can function as a stress relief and make a person feel more relaxed, somewhat sleepy, calm etc. And it gets associated with better mood and positive effects probably. 

In my opinion when only when a person who is not stressed out but exuberant, alive, vibrant and a in good state of mind by his own nature then he's going to experience big energy and motivation loss after ejaculation. But this may not be noticable from once in a week jerk off. But 2-3 times in a row would be a devastating experience imo.

But in my case ...even one session in a week or in a month leaves me feeling Lethargic and depressed.

  Do you think its different for different people? Like maybe it depends on your genetics probably? 


"life is not a problem to be solved ..its a mystery to be lived "

-Osho

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23 minutes ago, Someone here said:

But in my case ...even one session in a week or in a month leaves me feeling Lethargic and depressed.

  Do you think its different for different people? Like maybe it depends on your genetics probably? 

I think it's a normal response. People who say they don’t feel any energy loss after masturbation probably never experienced what it's like to be full of energy. So they are always in that low state of energy so it doesn't make any difference to them, plus i would imagine they just sit all day somewhere not doing anything active. It makes no difference whether u have lots of energy or no energy when all u do is watch youtube videos or smth.

The real impact of ejaculation becomes very appareat when you try be focused on some goal u want to achieve that requires determination and commitment, then it becomes very visiable how much the motivation drive drops low after masturbation. At least for me it's very noticeable. It feels like falling from 9floor for me ? 

Edited by Salvijus

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I feel relaxed and refreshed, like I just stepped out of the shower. The feeling of post-nut clarity is quite peaceful for me, it's like all my primitive sexual desires have been released and I can finally think clearly again.

3 hours ago, Someone here said:

I sense there is something physically harmful about masturbation.  

I can't be the only one who feels this way.

This might actually be the case for you. POIS is a thing, after all. I was curious how normal it was to not feel bad after masturbation though, compared to people who do feel bad or drained. Like, is it actually less normal to feel fine after masturbating? Seems like majority has voted "relaxed" so far though.

Edited by Osaid

"God is not a conclusion, it is a sudden revelation. When you see a rose it is not that you go through a logical solipsism, "This is a rose, and roses are beautiful, so this must be beautiful." The moment you see it, the head stops spinning thoughts. On the contrary, your heart starts beating faster. It is something totally different from the idea of truth." -Osho

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33 minutes ago, Salvijus said:

I think it's a normal response. People who say they don’t feel any energy loss after masturbation probably never experienced what it's like to be full of energy. So they are always in that low state of energy so it doesn't make any difference to them, plus i would imagine they just sit all day somewhere not doing anything active. It makes no difference whether u have lots of energy or no energy when all u do is watch youtube videos or smth.

The real impact of ejaculation becomes very appareat when you try be focused on some goal u want to achieve that requires determination and commitment, then it becomes very visiable how much the motivation drive drops low after masturbation. At least for me it's very noticeable. It feels like falling from 9floor for me ? 

Yeah same here.  Perfect description. 

I also feel like I don't wanna do anything in my life after I do It. I lose almost all motivation to achieve and conquer big goals. 

Why do think that is though?  What's the scientific explanation for this? Why do we feel low after nutting? 


"life is not a problem to be solved ..its a mystery to be lived "

-Osho

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15 minutes ago, Osaid said:

I feel relaxed and refreshed, like I just stepped out of the shower. The feeling of post-nut clarity is quite peaceful for me, it's like all my primitive sexual desires have been released and I can finally think clearly again.

This might actually be the case for you. POIS is a thing, after all. I was curious how normal it was to not feel bad after masturbation though, compared to people who do feel bad or drained. Like, is it actually less normal to feel fine after masturbating? Seems like majority has voted "relaxed" so far though.

I didn't know what POIS is. But I just Googled It .and I can relate. I do feel dead tired and in a depressive mood after fapping .Still have no clue why . Some of my friends who are married have sex 3-4 times per week and they are so energised and active .they hit the gym etc . 

Is it Really different from person to person? Can real sex also have the same impact? If we take into consideration the real sex requires more energy than fapping .because your whole body is moving in sex ..whereas in masturbation just your hands and your dick 


"life is not a problem to be solved ..its a mystery to be lived "

-Osho

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1 hour ago, Someone here said:

Would you say it's healthy if done without porn and in moderation? 

Normally yes. But I do not know if there are special cases where it might be detrimental.

I think masturbation has a lot of the benefits that are also associated with sex, like reduction of stress and maybe even positive effects on the immune system.

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@Someone here I also think that masturbation can even help you to improve the real sex.

Because the brain can't perfectly distinguish between real and imagined events if you visualize sexual acts while fapping you basically create positive sexual memories/experiences in your brain without having had sex.

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3 minutes ago, Someone here said:

I didn't know what POIS is. But I just Googled It .and I can relate. I do feel dead tired and in a depressive mood after fapping .Still have no clue why

There isn't much conclusive proof as to what the problem is, which is the case with most sexual problems, cause unfortunately things related to sexual health are not studied that much. The theories say it could be auto-immune related, allergy-related, or related to chemical imbalances in the brain. There are also theories to potential solutions as well though.

7 minutes ago, Someone here said:

Can real sex also have the same impact?

I think you've had real sex before judging from your previous posts, did that feel different? If I remember correctly there was a study showing some difference in real sex, like it is more sexually satiating because more prolactin is released or something. It might have a different result, who knows, sexuality is weird like that.

8 minutes ago, Someone here said:

Is it Really different from person to person?

Apparently. Even if we discount any projected guilt or shame or lethargy, POIS is a well-documented clinical condition.

15 minutes ago, Someone here said:

Why do think that is though?  What's the scientific explanation for this? Why do we feel low after nutting? 

How big of a motivator is your sex life to you? Imagine if you woke up one day and you got on to play your favorite video game, but then you realize you are completely disinterested in it and don't enjoy it at all anymore. That might be depressing. I feel like the same thing might be happening with masturbation, cause once you're done masturbating you basically lose all sexual interest for a bit. Not to mention, dopamine receptors are involved, Idk, this is just my crackpot theory.

12 minutes ago, Federico del pueblo said:

maybe even positive effects on the immune system.

If you've ever edged for a bit or gotten really horny, it does start to feel like a fever. It seems that being horny gets your body temperature so high that it basically creates a fever, which is interesting, and potentially useful for preventing sickness. This is just what I noticed and personally believe in.


"God is not a conclusion, it is a sudden revelation. When you see a rose it is not that you go through a logical solipsism, "This is a rose, and roses are beautiful, so this must be beautiful." The moment you see it, the head stops spinning thoughts. On the contrary, your heart starts beating faster. It is something totally different from the idea of truth." -Osho

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5 hours ago, Knowledge Hoarder said:

I'm not masturbating anymore, as I just really have no need for it anymore - and I'm too busy mentally, pursuing more pleasurable alternative? Easypeasy method made me quit for good. 

That being said, when I used to be a chronic masturbator (2-3 times a day), I felt all kinds of emotions after. Probably every single one mentioned above, and more. It really mostly depended on how I felt in that particuliar day in general, and the kind of porn I watched - or the kind of stuff I masturbated to.

Any boost in Motivation or perhaps work ethic since you quit, at this point of my life I only care about drive and motivation. anything would help. I do It 2 times a day :D

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12 minutes ago, Osaid said:

There isn't much conclusive proof as to what the problem is, which is the case with most sexual problems, cause unfortunately things related to sexual health are not studied that much. The theories say it could be auto-immune related, allergy-related, or related to chemical imbalances in the brain. There are also theories to potential solutions as well though.

I think you've had real sex before judging from your previous posts, did that feel different? If I remember correctly there was a study showing some difference in real sex, like it is more sexually satiating because more prolactin is released or something. It might have a different result, who knows, sexuality is weird like that.

Apparently. Even if we discount any projected guilt or shame or lethargy, POIS is a well-documented clinical condition.

How big of a motivator is your sex life to you? Imagine if you woke up one day and you got on to play your favorite video game, but then you realize you are completely disinterested in it and don't enjoy it at all anymore. That might be depressing. I feel like the same thing might be happening with masturbation, cause once you're done masturbating you basically lose all sexual interest for a bit. Not to mention, dopamine receptors are involved, Idk, this is just my crackpot theory.

I don't know if it's a thing .my own evidence is my own direct experience .I do feel POIS after fapping but like I said when I ask people whether in real life or online ,they can't relate to me and it's very rare that someone tells me he feels down after fapping.

i didn't have real sex before...As in full  penetration . I just had a quick blowjob from a hooker ?. Not so surprising that I also felt extremely bad about it .not just physically but emotionally because it's the first time I do something dirty like that .it's probably linked with feeling of guilt and regret. And that pays and manifests itself as physical symptoms as well .

23 minutes ago, Osaid said:

How big of a motivator is your sex life to you? Imagine if you woke up one day and you got on to play your favorite video game, but then you realize you are completely disinterested in it and don't enjoy it at all anymore. That might be depressing. I feel like the same thing might be happening with masturbation, cause once you're done masturbating you basically lose all sexual interest for a bit. Not to mention, dopamine receptors are involved, Idk, this is just my crackpot theory.

Yeah I agree .that's why I'm considering no-fap seriously. I made a commitment this year to stay clean for the whole year .but i already relapsed 4-6 times .but I'm determined this time to quit cold turkey .and my  ultimate goal is stop all forms of porn and masturbation and only use my sexual energy in marriage 


"life is not a problem to be solved ..its a mystery to be lived "

-Osho

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29 minutes ago, Someone here said:

Yeah I agree .that's why I'm considering no-fap seriously. I made a commitment this year to stay clean for the whole year .but i already relapsed 4-6 times .but I'm determined this time to quit cold turkey .and my  ultimate goal is stop all forms of porn and masturbation and only use my sexual energy in marriage 

Do you ever get wet dreams while abstaining? They become more common when you abstain. Do you feel ill after those?

You might benefit from some sort of spiritual sex practice. Shunning or demonizing sexuality will prevent you from feeling good after doing it, you can at least minimize the projection and negativity that comes after. Something I also noticed is that certain methods of masturbation leave much more sexual energy behind. For example, If I masturbate without touching my penis or if I have a wet dream, I still have much more sexual desire left over. And also, depending on how long you abstain, your sexual energy wont go back to 0 after doing it once. You still maintain the effects from abstaining even after doing it once. This is just my experience of course, seems like yours might be different.

It might also help to question your motivations, if masturbating diminishes it. Ask yourself why it matters so much if you masturbate or not in regards to your motivations. It might help to have some other activity or project or motivation to tend to after you're done masturbating.

Showers are really good at cleaning out the thought patterns and belief systems you've accumulated throughout the day, it's similar to meditation in that sense, actually it kind of forces you into meditation because the constant stimuli of water hitting you pulls you into the present moment.

29 minutes ago, Someone here said:

not just physically

Ah ok, so there were still physical symptoms. I would still consider that sex by my definition but maybe the lack of intimacy does play a factor.

29 minutes ago, Someone here said:

And that pays and manifests itself as physical symptoms as well .

Sure. The question is how big of a part is your physical chemistry playing in this though. POIS is recorded clinically, after all.

Edited by Osaid

"God is not a conclusion, it is a sudden revelation. When you see a rose it is not that you go through a logical solipsism, "This is a rose, and roses are beautiful, so this must be beautiful." The moment you see it, the head stops spinning thoughts. On the contrary, your heart starts beating faster. It is something totally different from the idea of truth." -Osho

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21 minutes ago, Osaid said:

Do you ever get wet dreams while abstaining? They become more common when you abstain. Do you feel ill after those?

I used to have wet dreams almost every week back in my teenage years . I don't anymore. I didn't have a single wet dream this year .even though I abstained for a long time.  Not sure why. Overall my libido is decreasing than what I used to 4 years ago .

21 minutes ago, Osaid said:

You might benefit from some sort of spiritual sex practice. Shunning or demonizing sexuality will prevent you from feeling good after doing it, you can at least minimize the projection and negativity that comes after. Something I also noticed is that

21 minutes ago, Osaid said:

 

certain methods of masturbation leave much more sexual energy behind. For example, If I masturbate without touching my penis or if I have a wet dream, I still have much more sexual desire left over. And also, depending on how long you abstain, your sexual energy wont go back to 0 after doing it once. You still maintain the effects from abstaining even after doing it once. This is just my experience of course, seems like yours might be different.

I also noticed this.  When I have a hands free orgasm whether through wet dreams or some hands-free-orgasm porn ..I still feel horny afterwards .

The longest I went without fapping was 90-100 days .and when I relapsed I didn't  immediately feel down. But usually what happens is called chaser effect. Is that one relapse leads to another one .and I end up doing it multiple times per week .and that really fucks me up .

21 minutes ago, Osaid said:

It might also help to question your motivations, if masturbating diminishes it. Ask yourself why it matters so much if you masturbate or not in regards to your motivations. It might help to have some other activity or project or motivation to tend to after you're done masturbating.

I guess sexual energy or libido as Freud calls it is the main driver to all out other activities. When you lose too much of it in extreme masturbation..it will naturally affect your motivations. 

 

Edited by Someone here

"life is not a problem to be solved ..its a mystery to be lived "

-Osho

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