patricknotstar

how to keep a girl interested long distance?

10 posts in this topic

Posted (edited)

I met a girl while visiting some family across the country. She is perfect, strikingly beautiful , kind etc... We hit it off and have been texting , calling , heart emojis and all. However I get anxious that she'll move on, It will still be another few months before I can go meet her again. Is this a frugal attempt, to expect someone who you only met for a few days to wait for you. Is there a way I can stay in touch without seeming desperate. Like is texting everyday too much. I really like her a lot. Like a lot a lot. One time we were texting and she said "stop showing me affection I might run away, jk" I don't know what that means. But yes it seems tough to maintain a relationship with someone were you can't escalate physically and neither have you known eachother for a very long time in person for example like if you were dating previously. 

Edited by patricknotstar
grammar

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Thats a pure torture and waste of time and energy dont let her beauty pull you in so hard treat this as something fun nothing serious my opinion...

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Dude move on or you’re going to get your heart fucked over hard here

If she’s showing tons of interest in making it work long distance then maybe it would be possible but if she’s not showing signs like that then you are so going to regret fawning over her

Ask yourself if you had 3 other girls equally as attractive but within walking distance if you’d still have this same obsession over her

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If there's so much distance between you two, how can this "relationship" develop any further?

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Long distance only makes sense for people already in a long term relationship. If you wanna keep in contact with her, stole the fire and maybe see her again, go for it. I wouldn’t over invest myself in it personally and be looking for another girl to date. 

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find a local girl also adjust your rose coloured glasses she's not perfect.

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Posted (edited)

I've made it work before, talked to someone online for years then moved to another country and lived with them for years.

Unless she's your 10/10 dream girl I wouldn't recommend it though. It's way easier and less emotionally difficult to date someone in your own city. Every time she goes out with friends it'll drive you crazy, wondering if she's going home with someone. Don't do it just out of a place of scarcity because you feel like you can't get anyone else.

If you are sure you want to do the long distance thing, then you're going to need to escalate soon. Pour your heart out and be totally vulnerable, tell her how you're feeling and what you want. And get her to agree to be exclusive. You gotta get past the jokey are-we-arent-we something stage, otherwise she's just going to be texting and flirting with you while fucking other guys.

Alternatively you can take that route and try to find someone locally, and then fall back on her if nothing else works out.

Edited by Yarco

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On 04/04/2022 at 5:27 AM, patricknotstar said:

One time we were texting and she said "stop showing me affection I might run away, jk" I don't know what that means. 

That means exactly what is says. It means she can feel your neediness but she's polite about it.

There's no harm in staying in contact with her, but you need to go and meet other girls at the same time. You've got one-itis. Don't get too needy or obsessed over one girl until you guys are regularly sleeping together and its moving into relationship territory. 

Creating space by not texting or speaking to her for a few days at a time will actually create attraction. But like I said, go and meet other girls. Who knows, you might find a much better girl.

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Posted (edited)

On 2022-04-03 at 8:27 PM, patricknotstar said:

I met a girl while visiting some family across the country. She is perfect, strikingly beautiful , kind etc... We hit it off and have been texting , calling , heart emojis and all. However I get anxious that she'll move on, It will still be another few months before I can go meet her again. Is this a frugal attempt, to expect someone who you only met for a few days to wait for you. Is there a way I can stay in touch without seeming desperate. Like is texting everyday too much. I really like her a lot. Like a lot a lot. One time we were texting and she said "stop showing me affection I might run away, jk" I don't know what that means. But yes it seems tough to maintain a relationship with someone were you can't escalate physically and neither have you known eachother for a very long time in person for example like if you were dating previously. 

She does show very heavy interest she is always asking me when I can come see her and all the things we can do and if I can come sooner. She tells me i'm the most interesting guy she met and how hot I am  and she doesn't talk to anyone else 

Edited by patricknotstar

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