SQAAD

Discouraged To Do Pickup After Watching This

115 posts in this topic

2 minutes ago, Federico del pueblo said:

You forgot to add the option "end the relationship".

Lol why? You would hate your gf so much that you wouldn’t want to make her happy on her bd? Lol or you’re bothered by the fact that she is being specific in terms of what she wants? You’d rather try and “surprise” her hoping you would guess what she wants (and fail, of course)? :) 

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@Leo Gura

are you willing to cover the tab when eating out? in the context of a long term relationship ?

Edited by Yali

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12 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

I don't mind spending money on a gf, within reason. But I don't buy her material things directly. It's more like I will make her nice food or pay for a hotel or plane ticket. Stuff like that. I'm not gonna be buying her stuff from her shopping list.

I guess she’s gonna have to buy that perfume that she wants on her bd herself then.

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Bro even if it's factually true just choose not to believe it. Don't listen to or base your life off of statistics or numbers. Nobody ever got anywhere in life based off the "facts".

They get somewhere in spite of them and telling whatever else is in the way to go fuck itself.


hrhrhtewgfegege

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8 minutes ago, K Ghoul said:

Lol why? You would hate your gf so much that you wouldn’t want to make her happy on her bd? Lol or you’re bothered by the fact that she is being specific in terms of what she wants? You’d rather try and “surprise” her hoping you would guess what she wants (and fail, of course)? :) 

10 minutes ago, Yali said:

@Leo Gura accidental quote....

 

No.

Read Leo's answer to your question, that already explains it pretty much.

Here's how I see it.

If money is being spent, then it's spent with a girl and not on a girl.

If a girl sort of demanded that I buy her certain things as birthday presents, then I'd know that she's not mature enough yet. It's a kind of childish thing to do.

Love is not about things. It's about shared experiences and values. It's about intentions and how you actually treat each other, behave around each other.

This idea of birthday presents (things) is some Hollywood programming, something that people have in their heads from watching shows, movies and series.

It has nothing to with actual love, because this is something you can't buy and if you have to buy each other things to proof your love, then something is wrong.

I might buy a girl a dildo or some other toy, but that's because we're gonna have a shared experience with that thing, not because I must buy her happiness.

Or I might buy an experience like some trip somewhere (for the same reason).

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7 minutes ago, K Ghoul said:

I guess she’s gonna have to buy that perfume that she wants on her bd herself then.

Exactly.

And if she isn't full of Hollywood social conditioning she won't have any problems with that.

She might simply buy it on any day, doesn't have to be her birthday.

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@Federico del pueblo  sad. “Hollywood programming”.. There is also called something called wanting to do something nice for the person you love. I guess it takes knowing what being in love means in order to relate to what I’m saying.

Also not exploring the context of one exploiting the other - if the bitch is dropping shopping lists trying to use you for money, that’s something very different.

 

Also come talk to me about how money is not important when you have a family/children that are hungry and someone needs to feed them 

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There is a hundred thousand videos, blog posts, articles, books, ideologies and beliefs shared around that you could believe and then feel like shit about yourself and your life. I encourage you to say "fuck that shit", and not swallow a single bit of it.

You know it's nonsense and not what you want because you feel like shit about it. That's your emotional wisdom saying "This is toxic. Don't ingest it."


Everyone is waiting for eternity but the Shaman asks: "how about today?"

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2 minutes ago, K Ghoul said:

@Federico del pueblo  sad. “Hollywood programming”.. There is also called something called wanting to do something nice for the person you love. I guess it takes knowing what being in love means in order to relate to what I’m saying.

Don't try to play your "I know what love is, but you don't" kind of games with me.

If you think that birthday presents are an important part of love, then you seem to be still rather far away from knowing love.

And what do you not understand about the other things I wrote like doing things together or going on some trip etc. (which all costs money)?

Haha, funny, this girl thinking that the parfume as a bd present is what proofs the love ?

 

I never said that money is not important for supporting a family. You just introduce a new element and then talk like I already said anything about it lol.

But even when you want a family, you don't need a guy who makes 200k.

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2 minutes ago, Federico del pueblo said:

If you think that birthday presents are an important part of love, then you seem to be still rather far away from knowing love.

That's not true. I think @K Ghoul's top love languages just might be Receiving Gifts, and Words of Affirmation <3


hrhrhtewgfegege

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@K Ghoul

1 hour ago, K Ghoul said:

@Leo Gura Imagine your gf’s bd is coming up and she told you what type of perfume she would like, sent you the info with picture of that specific kind etc. You go to the store to buy it and see that there’s another one on sale 50% off - same brand but different kind, smell kinda similar though - what would you do? Get her the one that she wants, or the one that’s one sale?

   I'd get her the best kind, but if there's one on sale and I know it's a pretty decent perfume, then I'd get that instead, or give her a gift card if I know where she normally shops, and gaslight her into getting the most expensive cologne for my BD, or gift card. Otherwise, no bd gifts.

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@Federico del pueblo birthday are just easy opportunities (out of many) to express your love for someone, to make her feel loved and special.. it could be perfume it could a dress it could be whatever, who cares. What’s important and that the message is being relayed to her that you love her by giving her/doing something that she WANTS, just for her, without you trying to derive any sort of benefit from it for yourself (like you with your dildo). That would require for you to understand female psychology in order to see why small shit like this matters. Which you don’t  :) but I hope you do learn one day, I don’t want you to be one of those guys who get blindsided by a breakup/divorce, completely shocked that she leaves because he thought “they were happy together” lol 

Just like saying things like “I love you” to her on a regular basis (I know lots of men are oblivious  to how important this is because in their logical mind it’s obvious that they love her why tf repeating the same shit over and over again (they are with her after all aren’t they and if something changes she would be the first one to find out) yet doesn’t work quite the same way for females - we need to hear it.

what else. Oh. Dating/courtship, that’s actually how I’m screening for men, by observing if he’s listening to my needs, my wants, and doing things for me “just for me”. This one dude has been giving me gifts etc. but guess what he doesn’t fucking listen, when I mention what type of chocolate I like to eat, for example, the next time we hang out he brings me the kind that I don’t like (because he works at a place where he can get chocolate for free) so instead of going and spending money to buy things that I like he’s just giving me that garbage… And I register things like that, and the more instances like this I register the less I want to be around someone like that..

Edited by K Ghoul

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5 minutes ago, Danioover9000 said:

@K Ghoul

   I'd get her the best kind, but if there's one on sale and I know it's a pretty decent perfume, then I'd get that instead, or give her a gift card if I know where she normally shops, and gaslight her into getting the most expensive cologne for my BD, or gift card. Otherwise, no bd gifts.

It’s not about getting her the best kind - it’s about listening to her and what she wants. I personally don’t even think she should be asking anything before you are actually her husband. It’s just that particular example with a bd present - I let they guy know what I want when and IF I get asked, it’s not like I come at him myself out of nowhere “heyyy my bd is coming up this is what I want, take notes”. 

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@K Ghoul

5 minutes ago, K Ghoul said:

It’s not about getting her the best kind - it’s about listening to her and what she wants. I personally don’t even think she should be asking anything before you are actually her husband. It’s just that particular example with a bd present - I let they guy know what I want when and IF I get asked, it’s not like I come at him myself out of nowhere “heyyy my bd is coming up this is what I want, take notes”. 

   So, in this example are you the BF or GF?

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@K Ghoul

I don't wanna go even more off topic in this thread (we already made it derail at this point).

You can open a thread about love, bd presents and female psychology if you want to and I'll reply there.

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@K Ghoul there is a reason why they are single. really don’t bother. i’m giving up on trying, who for? 

i have a father who not once in my life bought me a birthday present. i hate him.

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2 minutes ago, mememe said:

@K Ghoul there is a reason why they are single. really don’t bother. i’m giving up on trying, who for? 

i have a father who not once in my life bought me a birthday present. i hate him.

@mememe What an asshole… I’m sorry :(

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58 minutes ago, K Ghoul said:

@mememe What an asshole… I’m sorry :(

no it’s ok, at least i would never be with someone like that - i learned that very early on and i guess women who get presents from their family are the same. it doesn’t matter if no present culture or present culture - non-culture is a turn off. i mean if they don’t like their girlfriends at least these women get a chance to notice their value.

everything has an equivalent, everything is in balance.

Edited by mememe

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