I think I found the root of depression

[ted73104]

Let me know what you guys think, but the root cause of depression is that you fundamentally are critical or disapprove of yourself from a emotional standpoint. You overall have a negative opinion of yourself deep inside you. Now this may seem to be obvious, but your emotional opinion of yourself is actually really subtle. Meaning that it is likely that you don't realize how much you dislike yourself, or how much you judge yourself negatively.

And therefore the cure to depression is to find a way to like yourself, have a real positive opinion of yourself. You get into an emotional state where you think I'm good, I like where I am, and I'm happy with what I got. From our upbringing, there are tons of criterias that we picked up growing up that we use to judge ourselves whether we are "worthy". Normally our ego will function as a shield to fend off those negative criticisms, but when the case happens where we discover that we're in a situation where we don't like ourselves fundamentally, the ego becomes hurt and turns around to criticize ourselves. If we stay in this emotional state for a long time, then the depressed emotion becomes sort of permanent.

Emotions I think have inertia, meaning that if you're used to feeling some way most of the time, those emotions will likely occur naturally in your feelings. We get depression when we have a negative emotion about ourselves for a long time. The solution is to generate positive emotions about ourselves internally, I don't think you need as much positive emotions as much as the previous negative emotions, but the ability to generate enough positive emotions would suffice.

But generating positive emotions about ourselves sometimes is pretty hard. The goal is to live up to your expectations, but the real method is probably to lower your expectations and criterias to be happy with yourself. 

I'm still struggling with depression too, but this is what I've found.

[Raze]

Try IFS therapy or self therapy by Jay Early, it can help you reduce negative emotions internally. You should also not run away from negative emotions as that just represses them.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=byRYKW0pDuc

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=abRaPYjb6mA

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WLzTRHay_Tw

Edited December 1, 2021 by Raze

[Loba]

10 hours ago, ted73104 said:

Let me know what you guys think, but the root cause of depression is that you fundamentally are critical or disapprove of yourself from a emotional standpoint. You overall have a negative opinion of yourself deep inside you. Now this may seem to be obvious, but your emotional opinion of yourself is actually really subtle. Meaning that it is likely that you don't realize how much you dislike yourself, or how much you judge yourself negatively.

And therefore the cure to depression is to find a way to like yourself, have a real positive opinion of yourself. You get into an emotional state where you think I'm good, I like where I am, and I'm happy with what I got. From our upbringing, there are tons of criterias that we picked up growing up that we use to judge ourselves whether we are "worthy". Normally our ego will function as a shield to fend off those negative criticisms, but when the case happens where we discover that we're in a situation where we don't like ourselves fundamentally, the ego becomes hurt and turns around to criticize ourselves. If we stay in this emotional state for a long time, then the depressed emotion becomes sort of permanent.

Emotions I think have inertia, meaning that if you're used to feeling some way most of the time, those emotions will likely occur naturally in your feelings. We get depression when we have a negative emotion about ourselves for a long time. The solution is to generate positive emotions about ourselves internally, I don't think you need as much positive emotions as much as the previous negative emotions, but the ability to generate enough positive emotions would suffice.

But generating positive emotions about ourselves sometimes is pretty hard. The goal is to live up to your expectations, but the real method is probably to lower your expectations and criterias to be happy with yourself. 

I'm still struggling with depression too, but this is what I've found.

I was just having this insight into depression and here this thread is.  I agree with you, I follow you, it makes perfect sense to me.
That probably is the cure to depression, so... working on hobbies must fix it; things that put you in a state of flow, that feel good and over time can produce a positive result i.e. improvement.  With a hobby, you are doing an action just for the sake of enjoyment, and that is the opposite of depression, and it cures the self esteem issues as well.
Those were my thoughts, but you worded it much better.

I need to stop thinking of myself as so bad, and being so negative towards who I am all the time because this is not the truthful orientation.  It is just one that I happened to adopt by accident growing up.  Of course I'd be depressed, I treat my inner self so unkindly and there's no need for it.

Good insights, it helped to word something that I was feeling strongly about.

[silene]

@ted73104  you make some great points. Although depression may have multiple sources. I watched this video today by a psychologist who has a list of causes. One of his ideas is to look forward to a future which can be changed, rather than spend too much time dwelling in a past which can't. 

 

Edited December 1, 2021 by silene

[Gianna]

Great inquiry! I think this is spot on! Nice analysis ?

[ted73104]

Thanks to everyone who replied. I think one of the big obstacles to overcoming depression, is that there is always this criteria you need to overcome or fulfill in order for you to accept yourself, something you desperately want. But the hard truth is to realize that it's not worth it feeling bad about yourself if you don't meet that demand. Life has many aspects to discover and enjoy, you don't have to be depressed because you will probably never get that one thing.

[Hugo Oliveira]

Good stuff! I think collaborating with people can be a medicine. Providing value in unique ways + getting connected is great.