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Terell Kirby

Awakening is a homecoming

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Feeling immense gratitude this morning. To describe it would almost be a dis-service.

I feel at home, I understand now that this is really the only thing that we desire in this thing called life, the feeling of being home.

The journey is complete once we recognize that home is here and now, that we have always been home. We have had the keys to the kingdom of Heaven for eternity, but generations of survival required for human flourishing has distorted our perceptions, and moved us further away from Truth.

Nothing that we do in life, materially speaking, will satisfy God's desire to come home.

But once you do come home, you are there forever :x

Edited by Terell Kirby

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Awakening does feel like coming home. However, it is only the first step in the spiritual journey. Most of us, after awakening, fall back to sleep. The challenge is to remain awake for longer periods of time, until it is a perpetual state of being.


Just because God loves you doesn't mean it is going to shape the cosmos to suit you. God loves you so much that it will shape you to suit the cosmos.

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@Moksha of course.. but I will say that the realization is so powerful that it's enough to keep you motivated to stay  awake for an entire lifetime (and hopefully beyond this life).

Edited by Terell Kirby

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@Terell Kirby

You had me with the title, right in the feels you sob. Reminded me of a day I spent in a kindergarten class. For the art portion, it was draw an animal you would like to be, and write why below it. They were all great, but one girl drew a snail in a big shell with a big happy smile, and below it said “because I will always be home”. 
 

Then there was this one kid who drew a person and wrote the word why below it. Kid looked just like me too, it was uncanny. But that’s probably for a different subsection. 


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@Terell Kirby There are lesser awakenings that may not even be realized as such. Even children can have these moments of clarity, without seeing them for what they are. I agree that when "the awakening" happens, it is an irreversible paradigm shift. You may still fall asleep after, but the seeing is an inextinguishable fire that will ultimately consume your desires, until there is no you left, only the fire.


Just because God loves you doesn't mean it is going to shape the cosmos to suit you. God loves you so much that it will shape you to suit the cosmos.

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19 hours ago, Terell Kirby said:

But once you do come home, you are there forever :x

FACTS

14 hours ago, Moksha said:

You may still fall asleep after, but the seeing is an inextinguishable fire that will ultimately consume your desires, until there is no you left, only the fire.

Do you still find ambition in life despite this? I'm in the process of embodying and it's hard because the source of motivation for a lot of things has to change after this work.

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It is wonderful to be able to rest in the present, which is you and you always were. It feels like coming home, a sense of childhood joy. give yourself and your desires and projections to the pure present and forget about yourself. The only problem that I see since this begins to be possible for me, is that I find the company of other people very annoying beyond a short time, since their way of seeing life, their speech, so attached to to he mind, affects me and makes me fall back on the mental to me. because really, the source of suffering, of having separated myself from reality and having lost myself in the mental for so long, comes from the relationship with others

Edited by Breakingthewall

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2 hours ago, Breakingthewall said:

The only problem that I see since this begins to be possible for me, is that I find the company of other people very annoying beyond a short time, since their way of seeing life, their speech, so attached to to he mind, affects me and makes me fall back on the mental to me. 

I can relate - I believe it's just the challenge of integration.

This is the stage I am working through now, and requires a certain level of mastery..practically speaking.

Thanks for sharing.

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3 hours ago, Breakingthewall said:

It is wonderful to be able to rest in the present, which is you and you always were. It feels like coming home, a sense of childhood joy. give yourself and your desires and projections to the pure present and forget about yourself. The only problem that I see since this begins to be possible for me, is that I find the company of other people very annoying beyond a short time, since their way of seeing life, their speech, so attached to to he mind, affects me and makes me fall back on the mental to me. because really, the source of suffering, of having separated myself from reality and having lost myself in the mental for so long, comes from the relationship with others

yes relationship is dependency restriction neediness

you hitch your wagon to another and you each assert you need one another and have to receive certain things from them

this is a losing proposition for someone of consciousness

how about one explore relating souls

assist the other to become the best version of their self but do away with expectations and requirements

support one another in truth with no need on either side to restrict one another's freedom

other necessary relationships are maintained as obligated

 

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3 hours ago, Ry4n said:

Do you still find ambition in life despite this? I'm in the process of embodying and it's hard because the source of motivation for a lot of things has to change after this work.

When the attachments of the self are dissolved, everything false falls away, including ambition. Engagement with life is lighter, and more pure. It is more about enjoying life and helping others, than about proving yourself. You still have to survive of course, but even that is easier because your work is improved by creativity and quality that wouldn't have been available otherwise.


Just because God loves you doesn't mean it is going to shape the cosmos to suit you. God loves you so much that it will shape you to suit the cosmos.

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13 hours ago, Moksha said:

When the attachments of the self are dissolved, everything false falls away, including ambition. Engagement with life is lighter, and more pure. It is more about enjoying life and helping others, than about proving yourself. You still have to survive of course, but even that is easier because your work is improved by creativity and quality that wouldn't have been available otherwise.

I definitely feel that to be my default attitude these days, especially at 21 my mindset is so different than everyone else you can't help but notice these things. I guess I just miss some of that ruthless ambitious feeling even though a lot of it stemmed from fear and neuroses, but at the same time the meaning of life is to just live fully so sitting around doing nothing wouldn't be in accordance with that either. The lack of concern for proving anything to anyone definitely rings true for me, it shocks myself the most. 

Starting a business for ex when you're already so content inside is a weird journey, because beforehand certain personal problems could be used to motivate you. I hope that makes sense. 

IDK man...this stuff can sneak up on you in a way where before you know it you're there and there's no turning back, you have a new life now with a whole new way of permanent being, and especially being this young having gone so deep already your life feels finished before it even began. Your "homecoming" is essentially the start of a whole new life. I still can't believe it. How is this even real? 

Perhaps I should look to the "helping others" part for more of that drive? 

Sorry if this is too much of a vent xD lol, it's just such a transition. I guess at a certain point you just continue cos what else we gonna do? But that also enlightenment won't necessarily get your ass off the couch always. Goes to show the human self still needs work after "enlightenment".

 

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@Ry4n Great insights, you are on a good path. While it's true that insecurity can motivate you, it never delivers the fulfillment that it promises. When your life is aligned with the inner Self, it becomes more about the journey than the destination. The simplest moments are deeply satisfying in their own right.

People waste so much of their lives chasing accomplishments, or numbing themselves to suffering. That's ok, it is part of the spiritual journey too. When we are finally ready, we realize the futility of looking for meaning outside of ourselves, and discover the abundance that is already within.

You're young and have your whole life ahead of you. Couple of caveats to keep in mind. Be careful about developing the identity of an enlightened being, rather than letting go of identity entirely. If someone is truly enlightened, they have no need for self-esteem, because they are essentially transparent. They still have a personality, but rather than being defined by it, they are translucent and Consciousness shines through them.

Also, realize that enlightenment is a lifelong journey. It's easy to fall into the trap of believing you have "seen the light!" and will never fall asleep again. For most of us, awakenings are punctuated by periods of unconsciousness. Especially when a deep awakening occurs, the ego becomes increasingly desperate, and it's not unusual to go through a dark night of the soul. Eventually, things smooth out, but be patient and kind to yourself in the process.


Just because God loves you doesn't mean it is going to shape the cosmos to suit you. God loves you so much that it will shape you to suit the cosmos.

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3 hours ago, Fearless_Bum said:

@Terell Kirby Beautiful, now the next step is realizing you're not enlightened. Come back to the market place. 

This is true lol. The last step in this process is the hardest.

In the end there is no “me” to be enlightened. I am enlightenment itself.

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Yep,

Can't get closer or further away from everything. 

Every direction or staying put is already it.

There's only nowhere to get to.

 


“Everything is honoured, but nothing matters.” — Eckhart Tolle.

"I have lived on the lip of insanity, wanting to know reasons, knocking on a door. It opens. I've been knocking from the inside." -- Rumi

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10 hours ago, Moksha said:

@Ry4n Great insights, you are on a good path. While it's true that insecurity can motivate you, it never delivers the fulfillment that it promises. When your life is aligned with the inner Self, it becomes more about the journey than the destination. The simplest moments are deeply satisfying in their own right.

People waste so much of their lives chasing accomplishments, or numbing themselves to suffering. That's ok, it is part of the spiritual journey too. When we are finally ready, we realize the futility of looking for meaning outside of ourselves, and discover the abundance that is already within.

You're young and have your whole life ahead of you. Couple of caveats to keep in mind. Be careful about developing the identity of an enlightened being, rather than letting go of identity entirely. If someone is truly enlightened, they have no need for self-esteem, because they are essentially transparent. They still have a personality, but rather than being defined by it, they are translucent and Consciousness shines through them.

Also, realize that enlightenment is a lifelong journey. It's easy to fall into the trap of believing you have "seen the light!" and will never fall asleep again. For most of us, awakenings are punctuated by periods of unconsciousness. Especially when a deep awakening occurs, the ego becomes increasingly desperate, and it's not unusual to go through a dark night of the soul. Eventually, things smooth out, but be patient and kind to yourself in the process.

Thank you very much for the advice, highly appreciated and yes a spiritual ego is a sneaky bastard no doubt. I find spiritual smugness very grotesque, and the zen attitude of going from the most divine places to a completely humble "normie" very inspiring.

11 hours ago, Moksha said:

the ego becomes increasingly desperate, and it's not unusual to go through a dark night of the soul. Eventually, things smooth out, but be patient and kind to yourself in the process.

I'm glad to hear this because that does seem to be the trajectory I'm heading (thank God) because that nihilistic phase can last a long time but the drive for living fully does come back, but like you said it's more about the journey than a specific accomplishment. 

It seems a lot of us on this journey will have to shrug off this "hustle" culture that is so unhealthy, especially in self help circles such as this one; there's something infectious about it and maybe some of it's good but yes ultimately unfulfilling. One could perhaps use that fire for life itself I think. 

To be fully engaged in the world yet very detached is most definitely an art form, but I'm excited to see how practicing it will play out. Thanks again.

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@Ry4n Well said. Consciousness creates the dream, and each form within the dream, for a reason. While human life isn't ultimately real, it is still Consciousness expressing itself, and as such is worthy of joy.


Just because God loves you doesn't mean it is going to shape the cosmos to suit you. God loves you so much that it will shape you to suit the cosmos.

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On 18/10/2021 at 10:32 PM, Moksha said:

Awakening does feel like coming home. However, it is only the first step in the spiritual journey. Most of us, after awakening, fall back to sleep. The challenge is to remain awake for longer periods of time, until it is a perpetual state of being.

how can we remain awake? I know it isn't something you 'do' but be. Please share what you can say  thanks

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