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Forza21

Loneliness after realization i'm god?

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Hi,
I had different vision of realization (it is mistake from the beginning, any vision at all i know) that after you find, who u really are, you'll get into state of peaceful bliss, joy, love. My realization instead is kinda based of fear, that it doesn't even matter at all, it doesn't make any sense,  there's only "me-god" so i had to make illusion of separate self, to not get lonely.

I know it's only a thought, and kinda of experience, and if u focus on "here and now" and emotions like "love" it gets peaceful, but anyway, it kinda feels like "illusion" because there's literally "no-other". 

It gets kinda sad, and pointless? What's your view on this? ( so basically what's your illusion of this?)

Edited by Forza21

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@Forza21 Im gonna do my best to answer you from my experience.

You are still in the ego mind thinking. Early stages of oneness can be hard on your psyche because all your life you saw yourself as separate, now you are breaking the illusion and loosing meaning that was built on the ego mind. Actually now that the illusion was broken through you will have to re-build your purpose towards what is meaningful and this may take some time. Recontextualization from separate self to oneness can be either hard or blissful. You will probably get a period where everything will be meaningless, you will slow down everything that you are doing, questioning everything. But later you will adapt it and be happy, just trust that it will come. Dark night of the soul can be hard. Just trust and keep on doing the work. Don't back down, I've been there, it happens to everyone eventually.

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1 hour ago, Forza21 said:

Hi,
I had different vision of realization (it is mistake from the beginning, any vision at all i know) that after you find, who u really are, you'll get into state of peaceful bliss, joy, love. My realization instead is kinda based of fear, that it doesn't even matter at all, it doesn't make any sense,  there's only "me-god" so i had to make illusion of separate self, to not get lonely.

I know it's only a thought, and kinda of experience, and if u focus on "here and now" and emotions like "love" it gets peaceful, but anyway, it kinda feels like "illusion" because there's literally "no-other". 

It gets kinda sad, and pointless? What's your view on this? ( so basically what's your illusion of this?)

A vision of realization isn’t a realization, it’s a vision. A finite thought. Realization is not yours. Realization is not based on fear. Love isn’t an emotion. If you’re experiencing life related emotions or concerns, it’s important to address them as such maturely & appropriately. Gotta work that stuff out. I mean, ‘give it to God’ yes, but don’t trick yourself so to speak by bypassing / projecting emotions you’re experiencing onto a vision as if it were realization. Don’t short change yourself like that or you’ll end up with a very discordant discouraging bigger picture perspective that you’ll only need to let go of. Sadness has a substrate of sorrow and sorrow’s substrate is unconditional love. But if ya let the ego hijack away with ‘sad & pointless’ it results in existential rumination and suppressing the love and keepin the sad. Must. Let. Go. ? Must see the audacity and absurdity of this notion, in this place of endless things to create, do and experience. There’s no moping bench in Disneyland. More fun, more love, more letting discordant thoughts go. Your usage of ‘illusion’ is a cover up of emotions you’re experiencing. Don’t look for others to join a pity party, let that party go, and be part of this actual celebration. 


MEDITATIONS TOOLS  ActualityOfBeing.com  GUIDANCE SESSIONS

NONDUALITY LOA  My Youtube Channel  THE TRUE NATURE

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@Forza21 it will take some time for the mind to adjust to the realization you had. 

In the meantime, you can try doing some shadow work, sitting with your emotions, feeling them, all that good shit

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1 hour ago, Nahm said:

A vision of realization isn’t a realization, it’s a vision. A finite thought. Realization is not yours. Realization is not based on fear. Love isn’t an emotion. If you’re experiencing life related emotions or concerns, it’s important to address them as such maturely & appropriately. Gotta work that stuff out. I mean, ‘give it to God’ yes, but don’t trick yourself so to speak by bypassing / projecting emotions you’re experiencing onto a vision as if it were realization. Don’t short change yourself like that or you’ll end up with a very discordant discouraging bigger picture perspective that you’ll only need to let go of. Sadness has a substrate of sorrow and sorrow’s substrate is unconditional love. But if ya let the ego hijack away with ‘sad & pointless’ it results in existential rumination and suppressing the love and keepin the sad. Must. Let. Go. ? Must see the audacity and absurdity of this notion, in this place of endless things to create, do and experience. There’s no moping bench in Disneyland. More fun, more love, more letting discordant thoughts go. Your usage of ‘illusion’ is a cover up of emotions you’re experiencing. Don’t look for others to join a pity party, let that party go, and be part of this actual celebration. 

This is so, so true. I think most of us, if not all, went through at least one phase of existential dread about the realizations in spiritual work. Some may call it a dark night, others may not. What matters is that it is transient. It is the period of hollowing out all the expectations we came to hold about life as finite human beings with a nice collection of "stuff"—goals, identities, histories. 

There is an ocean of love on the other side of rumination. Thought cannot nourish you; only love. 

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2 minutes ago, OneHandClap said:

Thought cannot nourish you; only love. 

? Got my tombstone verbiage now, thank you. 


MEDITATIONS TOOLS  ActualityOfBeing.com  GUIDANCE SESSIONS

NONDUALITY LOA  My Youtube Channel  THE TRUE NATURE

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Just now, Nahm said:

? Got my tombstone verbiage now, thank you. 

Aw, you are beyond welcome! It was a note I jotted down during a dark period of searching. When the questions vanish, so too does the fear. And fear/thinking is really just a nutritionally devoid diet we keep feeding ourselves, hoping to be sated. Love and wonder is an endless buffet ;) 

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@Forza21 You are still interpreting your experience through the limited ego and human mind. God is beyond any concepts of alone, loneliness, only me and all these labels your mind is using to describe it. God is infinite. Our human minds are not capable of understanding something that is without any limits. Even to say it's only me, is already your human mind putting a limitation on it. Keep exploring and deepening your understanding. You will run into many paradoxes your mind will have trouble making sense of. If you are feeling fear, this is the ego distorting or misinterpreting your experience. It's a long process. You are only at the very beginning. 

Edited by Matthew85

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15 hours ago, OneHandClap said:

I think most of us, if not all, went through at least one phase of existential dread about the realizations in spiritual work.

Yeah I spent about all of 2020 with very little to no motivation on what used to excite me, my mind was 100% in the spiritual that everything else fell away for a bit and felt pointless. Thankfully it was just a phase that I’m out of now and I’m embodying this stuff nicely into human experience. It’s almost as if everything goes full circle from wanting to leave this painful human existence only to then see the true beauty of it having become “God” or whatever. From that limitless perspective, the meaning of having limitations is seen. Life would be utterly boring without it! (Eventually at least.)

Leave the marketplace, get woke af, re-enter the marketplace. 

Theres no grandiose purpose, instead you just live because every moment is a blessing; that’s there something rather than nothing for a minuscule blip in illusory time. Compassion itself is all that’s needed to align oneself with it. Love itself is the meaning of life. A very beautiful existence I think. 

 

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18 hours ago, OneHandClap said:

And fear/thinking is really just a nutritionally devoid diet we keep feeding ourselves, hoping to be sated. Love and wonder is an endless buffet ;) 

Love this so much ???


'When you look outside yourself for something to make you feel complete, you never get to know the fullness of your essential nature.' - Amoda Maa Jeevan

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