Self Acceptance, Self Non Acceptance

[Striving for more]

I accept my past, I accept the present, I accept the regrets & the stupidity, I accept the Insecurity & the pain. 

I accept myself. 

But I'm not accepting "the Future". 

I'm not accepting the future others expect from you, the future society expects from, the future leo or this forum expects from me, the future I even expect from me. The future I fear. The future of regret. 

I'm not accepting it. 

I'm not accepting humility & I'm not accepting compromise. I'm not accepting normalcy, average, or typical, I'm not accepting the expected. 

My problems are reoccurring, but I won't ever lose the desire to win. 

I think I'm done journaling for the day, I remind myself again that I love myself. I have nothing to lose. No kids on the way. No worse pain to possibly go through. It's only up from here & I've know this for a while but the plain takes time to leave the ground, once it starts levitating, there's no going back & velocity doesn't stop, the momentum becomes an unstoppable force. 

Find that momentum again, lift that plane of the ground. 

I think I'll leave on that note. Ima find some hot bitches to fuck this week fuck this forum. 

Think about the hot bitches, feel into that.

Edited September 16, 2021 by Striving for more