Leo you might be interested

[Ilan]

My claim is that I was this before being forced into psych wardhttps://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heyoka I would ask you to be openminded. I know you are not this kind of spiritual seeker at all. But basically, I naturally nurtured it my whole life. But basically, I discover you at 22. In took it to another level. Started psychedelics at 23. Which has made it uncontrollably violent and increase order of magnitude I would not even feel possible. I totally lost control this year and ended up in psychiatric hospital. 

I was doing this very violently and irresponsibly. If you want more info on me, go on my journal. This can be dangerous. I’m in hell right now because of this and lost my power that I nurtured my whole life. You can’t imagine the frustration and the pain I’m going through right now. I hope it serves as prevention for some future people. I hope my life failure serves well the infinite Goodness. I can’t stop regretting and telling myself what I could have done more for the world if the psych ward did not get me. 

[Leo Gura]

There exist such risks.

I hope you recover and ground yourself.

[taotemu]

@Ilan some people should NOT take psychedelics.  I hate how they are talked about like they are some kind of existential panacea.  Hopefully you will be able to navigate out of the hell you are in.  

[Roses_are_red]

I also resonate with being a Heyoka. I hope you are well. You’ll get through this, too, & hopefully it’ll make you stronger and wiser someday.

[hamedsf]

??

[Breakingthewall]

23 hours ago, Ilan said:

I can’t stop regretting and telling myself what I could have done more for the world if the psych ward did not get me. 

Friend , are you in the psych ward right now? If I were you, I would stop thinking about what could be and what could not be and I would try to move forward, eliminate ballast, refine my mind. life is a difficult adventure. Each one has his cross, being a victim will not help you at all. I understand that you want to warn of the dangers of psychedelics, but now you are alive. optimize your situation. put your will to improve. you will improve.

Edited September 1, 2021 by Breakingthewall

[Ilan]

more than to want to warn the danger of psychedelics, I want to warn the danger of psych ward and forced treatements. Psychedelics made me just improve so much that it became violent, but if I had take a long rest rather to go in a psych ward, I would have ground myself again and life would have go on on another lvl. I think the greatest danger with psychedelics is not bad trip, it is not hell trip, it is not even drug induced psychosis, I had all of those and I know for  a fact that all of this go away after a certain rest of not taking psychedelics again, moreover it allow an even more sain body mind that the one you had before psychedelics to take place after the "drug induced vulnerability" go away. I was just a lobster going for the next shell eating by a shark during the transition. Psychedelics are good violence pain, the pain that makes you more sain, more alive, more conscious(for me it made me even more conscious on a daily bases after a while). It is unbelievable, It really is true medicine, True healing of the body, It worked more than a strict green juice diet to heal my physical body on the long term. That is forced treatements which ruined my whole body mind. I know I have a lot of victim mentality here and I know that in the end, it was all on me. I should have been more cautious, more conscious of the high corruption within psych ward. And I told it as if I went compltetely mad but really it was not the case, really what I was doing was sharing raw love with the world. If you want the full story, I tryed to tell it the least biased possible way(it's hard when you're filled with hate) on my journal. I mean in the end I know eventhough I'm not conscious right now of this that I had full responsibility over my life and that I brought myself here. no one to blame but me. But you're right, it's turning to much around me. Let's stop this.

[OBEler]

@Ilan can you link your journal? You sound very mature, but I feel you are in dark places right now. So to conclude, psychedelics healed you, transformed you but sharing raw love was the thing that turned everything around?  Interesting .(I have a picture in my mind, running naked and hugging everyone. But that is probably too stereotyped)

[Ilan]

21 minutes ago, OBEler said:

@Ilan I have a picture in my mind, running naked and hugging everyone. But that is probably too stereotyped)

that is it in a nutshell