Blackhawk

Venting

245 posts in this topic

@Random witch How come your boyfriend simply doesn't change/improve then? I think it's because he can't.

And Trump can't become a good person.

Etc.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@Blackhawk Or maybe you are wrong and you cherry picking all the information that supports your beliefs system.

Relax, no one is immune to self delusion.

But being aware to the fact that you don't immune to delusions surprisingly makes you less self delusional.

The more you deny the fact you are self deluded, the deluded you are.

 

Just the fact that you're denying it shows how deluded you are.

And closed minded.

I'm less deluded than you because I see the life from many angales, I see all the possibilities, you see only one option. Very limited option that you repeat again and again and again.... Like a dogma.

Science isn't the true, if you want to find the true you won't find it through science because it's very limited. 

Science has many contradictory recarches.

I actually found a study that shows that our personality can deliberately change! 

https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/basics/personality/personality-change 

 

But you won't read it because it's long& and because it's threatening your belifs system. It's thretening your ego.

And at the end, why do you give a fuck about science? Do you really think that just because "science says so" you have to obey like a sheep?

 

Seems like you can't handle few options at the same time, you don't want to consider few different perspectives. Not because you can't, you actually can, and able, you are intelegent enough for it, but you won't do this because you are afraid.

Because you aren't aware of how your ego controls you.

Edited by Random witch

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@Blackhawk My BF didn't change because he doesn't want to although he can. He has no intention.

Same with trump.

In order to change one needs a will and intention.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@Random witch

"You can lose your weight, but you can't lose your personality. And people's personalities don't change."
— Ruth Marcus

"Your surroundings may change but your essence and your personality pretty much stay the same."
— Jenna Dewan

 

https://www.romper.com/p/5-personality-traits-you-cant-change-after-30-according-to-science-18233684

"The traits we sustain throughout the majority of our lives will manifest themselves by the time we mature and reach our third decade. Before then, especially in our teens and twenties, they will "fluctuate before landing into a stable pattern after 30," says Dr. Hafeez. Your personality at 30 will closely resemble the person you'll be at 60."

 

https://www.newsy.com/amp/stories/research-says-you-can-t-really-change-your-personality/

"Skip The Self-help — Research Says Your Personality Is Mostly Genetic"

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@Random witch I don't blindly believe in science. My opinion isn't because of science.

 

But ok, maybe you are right. But that doesn't mean that I will be able to get a partner. Everyone can't be succesful. It's not easy for men on the dating market, everyone isn't going to make it.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@Blackhawk 

You see this as excuses not to take an actions, as I said, you focus on what you can't do rather than what you can.

You give me here 5 sources of information that supports your beliefs but you have no guts to check contradictory studies.

You see, it's because you're not looking for the truth.

You are more care about keeping the illusion that you are right rather than serching for truth.

If you were really interested in truth you would be interested in contradictory researches, but you are not. You are only interested in those who fits your belifs as I said.

 

 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@Random witch I'm aware of that there's contradictory information, and I have seen some of them. I'm not a typical fool who refuse to look at things which doesn't align with my belief.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@Blackhawk Dating scene today is sucks for everyone, men and women. 

You don't have to be successful with all the women, no one in successful with all women... Even women aren't successful with all men.

You need the woman who fits to you, who won't be toxic or manipulative, who will love you and accept you, who'll give you value. But in order to get value you need to offer value back, otherwise it wouldn't be fair.

So you need to think about the value you can bring or develop one. Heal yourself and become an healthy man it's a good value that you can bring!

Don't tell me how horrible you are please.

Many people are suck in relationships because no one is educating us about this, so many people remind miserable loners. But those who will try to improve and to educate themselves about it, are more likely to be successful even beyond their expectations. It's not easy but it's possible and as I said, if you look for the easy path, forget about it.

 

Also if you're involved in some incel community or red pill stuff, be aware that it's toxic and it's prevent you from having a partner.

 

 

Edited by Random witch

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@Blackhawk I didn't say you are fool, 

Just deluded.

And it's OK because I'm also, but I do aware to this in my life, and when I have toxic belifs like yours I try to check more possible options to my situation. I know it's hard, but the more you practice this, the eaiser it become.

 

You are not fool but you're acting like a fool because you basically cut off the branch you're sitting on.

Also, seems like you want things to be easy for you and you prefer the easiest paths.

Which is also not bad and it's common human trait, everyone wants short cuts.

But your problem is that you're not aware to the fact that you want short cuts and you're upset because there's no short cuts so you invent a fictional story behind it and you stick to the information that justifies this fictional story

 

 

You are really lack of self awareness.

I don't want to insulte you but to open your eyes because they are very closed.

Edited by Random witch

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
28 minutes ago, Random witch said:

@Blackhawk Dating scene today is sucks for everyone, men and women. 

You don't have to be successful with all the women, no one in successful with all women... Even women aren't successful with all men.

You need the woman who fits to you, who won't be toxic or manipulative, who will love you and accept you, who'll give you value. But in order to get value you need to offer value back, otherwise it wouldn't be fair.

So you need to think about the value you can bring or develop one.

Don't tell me how horrible you are please.

Many people are suck in relationships because no one is educating us about this, so many people remind miserable loners. But those who will try to improve and to educate themselves about it, are more likely to be successful even beyond their expectations. It's not easy but it's possible and as I said, if you look for the easy path, forget about it.

 

Also if you're involved in some incel community or red pill stuff, be aware that it's toxic and it's prevent you from having a partner.

I have no idea what value I could offer, nor do I know what I could develop.

No I'm not involved in any incel or red pill community. My thoughts about this formed before I even heard about those things.

15 minutes ago, Random witch said:

@Blackhawk I didn't say you are fool, 

Just deluded.

And it's OK because I'm also, but I do aware to this in my life, and when I have toxic belifs like yours I try to check more possible options to my situation. I know it's hard, but the more you practice this, the eaiser it become.

 

You are not fool but you're acting like a full because you basically cut off the branch you're sitting on.

Also, seems like you want things to be easy for you and you prefer the easiest paths.

Which is also not bad and it's common human trait, everyone wants short cuts.

But your problem is that you're not aware to the fact that you want short cuts and you're upset because there's no short cuts so invent a fictional story behind it and you stick to the information that justifies this fictional story

I think I'm aware of that I want shortcuts.

I don't know.. It feels like people are trying to brainwash me into believing in a false belief that I could get a partner if I just work hard at improving myself etc. It's not a nice feeling. I don't want to be stupid enough to have false hopes.

How would you feel if everybody are constantly telling you that you will become the president of your country if you just work hard on improving yourself. After some time you might even start to believe in that insane idea.

But ok whatever, maybe it's true that I could get a gf. And maybe it's not true.

Edited by Blackhawk

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@Blackhawk If one person says that I can be a president only if I work hard enough I'd skeptical.

But if 5 says that, I would be less skeptical.

If 10 says that I'd belive them.

I'd feel flattered that so many people believe that I able to be a president! I'll assume that this is because people see in me leadership traits that I didn't see in myself, my confidence will rise, I would take a course of public speaking, study politics, write my agenda and political goals and bulid my creer step by step.

The problem is that I don't want to be a president so what people says wouldn't affect me so I'll do nothing about it.

 

But you do want to have partner, so many people tell you that you can but you deny it.

It looks like you don't really want to have a partner, you're not passionate about it, you are indifferent to it, you wait that it just will happen somehow like a miracle and you upset that this miracle doesn't happen.

Because you are deluded, this is depth of your delution that you don't question your own beliefs.

You believe that this is the final truth.

As I told you, cure yourself, become a healthy man that women can relay on, this is an example of a value you can bring.

Don't you want to be an healthy person? Do you want to maintain this toxic way of thinking and to pass it to your potential partner? How selfish of you.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited by Random witch

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@Random witch If everyone on earth would tell me that I can be president, I still wouldn't believe them. I know myself best. No one else.

 

You tell me that I can get a partner even when you haven't met me, you don't know anything about me, you haven't even seen a picture of me. Maybe I know better than you..

I actually don't wait that I will miraculously get a partner. I don't think I will ever get a partner. I have lost hope.

But maybe I still deep inside have some hope.. and that's probably stupid. Maybe it's just a primitive instinct thing.

 

Maybe I don't want a partner hard enough because I know that even if I would get one she would either cheat on me or break up with me. So what is the point.   I guess the solution would be to get a new partner, but that would again be difficult, it was hard enough one time, but pull it off a 2nd time after getting emotionally destroyed from the break up? ?

Edited by Blackhawk

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@Blackhawk Yes you wrote a lot of fictional stories here. That's strengthen my words.

You will be miserable just because you chose it. You choose it every day to believe to those fiction stories. You do this to yourself, this is very stupid.

Because you are deluded deeply, you need to seek help instead of trying to convince a strange woman how poor you are or not deluded you are. 

I'm tired of this thread because I talk to a person who doesn't wants to act, who just wants to complain and complain... How poor he is and how fucked up he his....

Yes, I'm wasting my time here, you just could tell me that I'm wasting  time trying to open your eyes instead of keep arguing with me.

You are deluded so deeply that you see all your believe system as facts.

Bullshit, as I said.

But yes, you don't care about the truth or about improving your life or something so it would be better to leave you here at peace at your comfort zone deluded bubble.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@Random witch Sorry if I wasted your time. But I admit that I might be deluded. You had more success in convincing me than most or all other people. So see it as a success. But I can't promise that it will change anything, but who knows.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@Blackhawk   Have you noticed that only you are saying you can't find happiness, get a girlfriend, a fulfilling job etc? Everyone else (except the trolls who don't count) are more open minded. If that's true in the forum, maybe it's also true when you ask women out on dates, or apply for jobs? 

I know you don't accept a diagnosis of  neurodiversity , I'm not pressing on that issue, but have you seen the UK TV series 'The Undateables' about people with challenging conditions on their journeys to go on dates and find love?  They haven't given up hope, I wish you hope too.    https://www.channel4.com/programmes/the-undateables 

Edited by snowyowl

Relax, it's just my loosely held opinion.  :) 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

are you trying to eat healthy

do you meditate

do you supplement vitamins

also consume less toxic news/media

are you doing things that you enjoy

and maybe engage less in the covid and other political debates, i don't think it's good for you

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@Blackhawk  Life is a beautiful and wonderful phenomena, with or without a partner.

Just to look at the birds flying, the green grass and it's smell, the sun. the moon, the smell of the spring, of the autumn.

There's so many good things in life that you can enjoy of them already, right now.

Your youth, physical health, safety, those are so valuable. People are too selfish and greedy to not appreciate those.

 

Every breath, is so beautiful and unique, so temporary, so mysterious, enigma.

There's so many things to look for, to seek, to learn, to enjoy of, to appreciate.

Edited by Random witch

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
5 hours ago, snowyowl said:

@Blackhawk   Have you noticed that only you are saying you can't find happiness, get a girlfriend, a fulfilling job etc? Everyone else (except the trolls who don't count) are more open minded. If that's true in the forum, maybe it's also true when you ask women out on dates, or apply for jobs? 

Yes..

5 hours ago, snowyowl said:

 

I know you don't accept a diagnosis of  neurodiversity , I'm not pressing on that issue, but have you seen the UK TV series 'The Undateables' about people with challenging conditions on their journeys to go on dates and find love?  They haven't given up hope, I wish you hope too.    https://www.channel4.com/programmes/the-undateables 

No I haven't seen that.

I don't like copy/paste stuff from some people to all other people. Like "I could do this and that, and that means also you can do the same thing."

It doesn't work like that.

3 hours ago, PurpleTree said:

are you trying to eat healthy

do you meditate

do you supplement vitamins

are you doing things that you enjoy

No.

No.

Yes.

No.

2 hours ago, Random witch said:

@Blackhawk  Life is a beautiful and wonderful phenomena, with or without a partner.

Just to look at the birds flying, the green grass and it's smell, the sun. the moon, the smell of the spring, of the autumn.

There's so many good things in life that you can enjoy of them already, right now.

Your youth, physical health, safety, those are so valuable. People are too selfish and greedy to not appreciate those.

 

Every breath, is so beautiful and unique, so temporary, so mysterious, enigma.

There's so many things to look for, to seek, to learn, to enjoy of, to appreciate.

Not everyone has the same opinion.

But yeah sometimes I can think that some things are nice. For example the sky, or a good song.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Reality/life is nothing but a huge huge disappointment.

Everything, everything in this existence is deeply disappointing and unsatisfactory.

There's nothing here that is truly amazing, nothing that makes me say: "this is worth living for, this makes all the other suffering worth it."

One of the biggest disappointments, if not the biggest, is other people.

I have more and more realized that everyone are selfish motherfuckers. They only care about themselves. They wont hesitate to hurt you if they don't get what they want from you. They don't care about you, they only care about themselves.

Being alone hurts, and other people hurt you too. Everything in this existence hurts.

It's all hopeless.

My life is the biggest joke ever.

I strongly suspect that people make themselves believe in nonduality stuff (that you are God, that everything is Love, etc.) simply because they can't accept how much reality/life sucks. Those beliefs makes everything seem so much nicer and it makes them more happy.

Yet I can't stop myself from reading about nonduality stuff, but it's a complete waste of time, but what else could I do on my spare time? Everyone say all kind of radical things but for me all those things are unverifiable, so their words are worth basically nothing.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

There's no words to describe how much I have had enough of my life.

 

It's remarkable that the marvelous universe managed to create something so ugly and shitty.

It's like the world's best piano player would just randomly smash the piano keys with his/her fists. I'm like.. "no, why are you doing that?"

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!


Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.


Sign In Now