Tangerinedream

Do guys like moody girls

150 posts in this topic

@Tangerinedream I was pretty openly depressive (especially as a teenager) and it never seemed to be a deterrent with the opposite sex.

Depressive, moody, cynical, kind of serious, "hated authority" (so I had an attitude).

I tended to attract people who either got it or were that way in some way themselves, or they had some kind of rescuer fantasy. Keep in mind this last point if this is not what you want to attract, either very similar or the exact opposite.

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1 minute ago, Gesundheit2 said:

@Hulia

Corrected it for ya :D

Thank you. But it´s realy a superstition. I hate this stupid joke, when the men say to it the women. Because it´s not true. I mean it´s not THAT bad - You don´t need to become an asshole.

And then these women... themeselves begin to spread this silly superstition. 

Actaully I hate all superstions about men and about women. 

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3 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

Some guys find moodiness cute and sexy.

 

 

 

I would be grateful if this kind of women, the mooda ones,  would play out there moodiness (assholeness) in front of their BF, who find it cute. And spare it to me and others who are not their BFs.

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Just now, Hulia said:

I would be grateful if this kind of women, the mooda ones,  would play out there moodiness (assholeness) in front of their BF, who find it cute. And spare it to me and others who are not their BFs.

You might want to play matchmaker and get them bfs who put up with their moodiness. It's a favor you would be doing.

 


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Just now, Preety_India said:

You might want to play matchmaker and get them bfs who put up with their moodiness. It's a favor you would be doing.

 

I have this one moody colleague. She has already her BF. But she is so proud of her moodiness that she wants to share it with every one. She really informed us every month, me and 15 R&D men, that in the coming days she will be especially "cute and sexy". 

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I am attracted to bitchy girls, and I think a large amount of guys are as well. That's not necessarily the same thing as moody, but I don't think it's bad to not be cheery and cartoonily happy all the time.

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9 minutes ago, AtheisticNonduality said:

I am attracted to bitchy girls, and I think a large amount of guys are as well.

I wonder why?

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21 minutes ago, AtheisticNonduality said:

I am attracted to bitchy girls, and I think a large amount of guys are as well. That's not necessarily the same thing as moody, but I don't think it's bad to not be cheery and cartoonily happy all the time.

I've always found it amusing when guys aren't that honest or self aware about this, specifically when they say that's NOT what they're attracted to.

(Then they date and chase the same type of woman over and over again.)

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No, generally not, but that's because most people (men) aren't in tune with their emotions themselves and don't want the stress of working on those sorts of things. Personally I'm only attracted to girls with a moderate or high level of emotional awareness. Look it's one thing to be moody and experience a wide range of emotions, I'm not blaming anybody for that. It's only human.

But if you aren't able (or trying) to reflect and understand why you feel a certain way, and put me in the crossfire of the consequences of those emotions, and then expect me to just "take it/deal with it" and NOT be doing anything yourself about it..... then sorry I'm outa there.

It's the standard I have for relationships. I am empathetic and will drop everything to be there to listen and help a partner through something, but they have to take responsibility for it too. If the boundary is crossed and I feel I'm doing all the legwork then it's not healthy and I'm just a dumpster for their feelings. Fuck that.

If I sense any of that it means they have some growing to do, and they've gotta do that on their own.

It's one of those things about becoming a healthy, complete person before you go pursuing other people. You shouldn't be depending on other people to "fix" you.


"Your mind can never change, unless you ask it to. Lovingly rearrange, the thoughts that make you blue."

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2 hours ago, AtheisticNonduality said:

I am attracted to bitchy girls, and I think a large amount of guys are as well. 

Good grief, really? I can think of fewer less attractive qualities, it just smacks of immaturity and I don't find it fun to be around that sort of energy (I have a female friend who can be very bitchy, and I always come away feeling drained whenever I'm around her - which isn't often, mercifully). I can't imagine establishing emotional intimacy and having a loving relationship with such a person.


'When you look outside yourself for something to make you feel complete, you never get to know the fullness of your essential nature.' - Amoda Maa Jeevan

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No.
They like doormats.


⊱⊱⊰⊰

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I am not a guy, but most psychologically healthy men who are independent and not needy and have game going on for them - lots of female attention, told me they prefer

- genuinely happy women

- fun loving women

- women with open communication 

- women who smile a lot

- women in whose presence these men can experience peace/calm and can fully relax and be themselves 

Moody is not in this list. 

I think guys who r attracted to moody girls, have some psychological issues or trauma. Remember 5 to 1 positive to negative interaction ratio? Moody girls are unstable psychologically and can't maintain 5 to 1 ratio consistently. 

Hell, if my BF was moody, I would drop him. Why do I need constant moodiness in my life? 😳🤔

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17 minutes ago, Raptorsin7 said:

@Emerald But what if the only options are men she finds undesirable?

It’s statistically improbable that she would never share a mutual attraction with a man she likes. Male desire is very abundant and eventually she will find a match.

But my point is that, if a woman is fretting about whether some facet of herself is attractive to men in general, that it isn’t a winning mindset and she’s leaving a lot of power off the table.

If a woman has the mindset, “How do I become attractive to men?” and not “What attracts me to a man?” then she’s got the cart in front of the horse.

A woman doesn’t need mass appeal in the eyes of men in order to find a compatible partner.

She just needs to be unapologetically herself and be intuitive and selective about who she chooses.


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Posted (edited)

11 hours ago, Emerald said:

You'd be much wiser to be asking yourself, "What kind of guys do I like?"

Women don't have to worry much about attracting. There will always be men who are attracted to you.

The big thing is standing empowered in your own intuition and being selective about who you choose.

And to worry about if you are generally attractive to men or not, will shift you into masculine attractor/pursuer mode as opposed to feminine selector mode.

And the feminine power sits with being the selector. 

Is this feminine power? Or is this empowerment in your agenda as a straight female?

After some thinking, I see that I don't agree with you on this. The way I see femininity, it's about receptivity and openness. Not decisiveness. The decisions are taken by the masculine side! Or the one in the lead.

What you're saying may help the straight female agenda, but I don't think it makes you more feminine. It helps you be more masculine and decisive. But it does the opposite of making you feminine - it makes you controlling and unable to trust the other person.

Also, if you're wanting to be more attractive to men as a woman, does that really make you a pursuer? Because you are an attractor. That's one of the things women or feminine individuals have going for them - they can choose who they attract and how! It's just a different way of being an attractor than the masculine/pursuer.

I think that the 'feminine power sitting with being the selector' sounds more like a male projection of what 'feminine power' is! Who told you this? What are your sources?

Edited by Parththakkar12

"Do not pray for an easy life. Pray for the strength to endure a difficult one." - Bruce Lee

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3 minutes ago, Parththakkar12 said:

Is this feminine power? Or is this empowerment in your agenda as a straight female?

After some thinking, I see that I don't agree with you on this. The way I see femininity, it's about receptivity and openness. Not decisiveness. The decisions are taken by the masculine side! Or the one in the lead.

What you're saying may help the straight female agenda, but I don't think it makes you more feminine. It helps you be more masculine and decisive. But it does the opposite of making you feminine - it makes you controlling and unable to trust the other person.

Also, if you're wanting to be more attractive to men as a woman, does that really make you a pursuer? Because you are an attractor. That's one of the things women or feminine individuals have going for them - they can choose who they attract and how! It's just a different way of being an attractor than the masculine/pursuer.

I think that the 'feminine power sitting with being the selector' is more of a male projection on what they've told you 'feminine power' is! Who told you this? What are your sources?

And who tells you that a woman can't be masculine ?

And who tells you that she can't be attractive ?

Is it some word from God that you get to decide what and how a woman should be or shouldn't be ?


 INTP loner... .shy girl.. 

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5 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

And who tells you that a woman can't be masculine ?

And who tells you that she can't be attractive ?

Is it some word from God that you get to decide what and how a woman should be or shouldn't be ?

Kay, fine. Be masculine all you want. You are free to do that. But, don't hope to attract a masculine guy when you do that! Don't tell me I didn't warn you.


"Do not pray for an easy life. Pray for the strength to endure a difficult one." - Bruce Lee

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4 minutes ago, Parththakkar12 said:

Kay, fine. Be masculine all you want. You are free to do that. But, don't hope to attract a masculine guy when you do that! Don't tell me I didn't warn you.

A woman can have both masculine and feminine traits and switch it as she pleases.

Your warnings are useless.

You're not warning. You're simply imposing yourself on others. It doesn't fly in 21st century, maybe it worked in 6th century.

 


 INTP loner... .shy girl.. 

Quick access to journal entries

 

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