InsecureAnon

Insecure & depressed about my height. Considering suicide

128 posts in this topic

29 minutes ago, Lucas-fgm said:

@InsecureAnon  So make a really nice tinder profile or keep approaching girls that are your height or a little bit shorter.

I have no issues approaching shorter girls. 

But I think they all still won't want me. Im still too short. 

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2 minutes ago, InsecureAnon said:

But I think they all still won't want me. Im still too short. 

This is a story you are telling yourself. It's a limiting belief. 

Whether you think you can, or think you can't, you're right. 


"I could be the walrus. I'd still have to bum rides off people."

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2 hours ago, Mason Riggle said:

Im 5' 7" - 5' 8".  I've been with plenty of women. It's not your height. 

 

Same here, 5-7 -5-8. Where I am very few men are shorter than me and most are around 6 ft or more. I used to think like you did, and I was never with anyone, but now that that's changed I realize my height is a negligible factor. I hope repetition will help you realize that you are deluded thinking height is the problem. 

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3 hours ago, InsecureAnon said:

I don't think anything will change

@InsecureAnon This is exacly why you are stuck.

you can't change you height, but you can change your mentality, attitude and approach.

Shorter guys that you gats laid anyway. Why do you think that is? 

The bad thing is: you lack traits which are scientifically more important in dating than height.

The great thing is: you can develop them! Go work on Charisma, Leadership, Purpose, Sense of Humour, Spontaneity, Smile etc.
Once you see that you make progress in this areas you will start to notice that you CAN change for the better.

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Posted (edited)

4 hours ago, Emerald said:

Don’t just lol him.

He’s considering suicide. 

Obviously you’re loling him because you know that he can be successful. But that’s not how a suicidal person will interpret that.

Nah, his delusions need to be laughed at. Hard.

Calmly telling him why he's wrong won't change him.

I mean, just look at his responses so far lol. His head is totally buried in the sand.

I lean toward the empathetic/compassionate route myself in most occasions, but let's not discount the need for direct, no-bullshit retorts.

I mean seriously? You're going to kill yourself because your body is ONE INCH shorter than the average male height (5'9)? That's fucking ridiculous.

It's actually offensive towards people with actual physical disabilities.

The lack of respect towards his mother who birthed him is palpable.

If I were in a one-on-one conversation with him face-to-face, I wouldn't be so harsh. Because there I could actually show him empathy, compassion, and energetic love. But on an online forum where all he sees is a wall of text, he needs to be slapped. Coddling him here does nothing.

@InsecureAnon Girls swerve you because you're drenched in insecurity. You stink of it. They don't give a shit about your fucking height lmao. You're so damn insecure it's so obvious. You even put "insecure" in your online name lmao. I bet the girls IRL feel the insecurity seeping out of you the second they look at you, you don't even have to open your mouth. It's like you walk around in a gaseous fog of self-hatred. That automatically deletes anything good you've got going for you. Girls reject you for your self-hatred before they even register the notion of height.

So become secure. This is something you have power over. Prove me wrong. Prove us all wrong. Become strong. Get the women of your dreams. It's possible. Just become secure. There are plenty of resources online. Get studying'. Act on any confidence/self-love tips you learn. Literally go to YouTube right now and search "confidence."

You can do it.

Edited by RendHeaven

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Guys you need to understand that this height thing is relative. He lives in country with tall people. Being 5 8 in such a country would be the equivalent of being like 5 2 in america. “I am 5 2 does not work as an argument because american girls are short in comparison. A better question to this thread would be:

Can you get girls that are TALLER than you? This is the real question.

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My ex was 5’8 and I’ve never loved anyone harder than him, he was the the most attractive guy I’ve literally ever seen and I’m not even exaggerating. I’m 5’1, So for me 5’8 is good enough 

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I am 5'1 as a guy try to fathom that😉

Ego is never satisfied right. 

Play off your strengths. God wanted to have the experience of you so much try to honor it. 😁

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8 hours ago, InsecureAnon said:

I am about 5 foot 8 - 5 foot 9, (somewhere between 173 - 175 CM) & I refuse to measure myself because I'm scared it's even 172-173.

WTF?

That is a perfectly average and normal height, I fail to understand what your complaint is. I think your issue maybe is incel blackpill ideology that you may have accumulated through the internet.

 


لا إله إلا الله، وليو رسول الله

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Dear, I am sorry you feel so bad about your height that u r thinking about the suicide 😢😢😢😢

But I will be honest with you. 

I live in Asia, in Singapore specially. And here average height of a guy is 170cm. If you are 175cm,u r already considered tall. Girls here are rarely taller than 165cm. So when i am in Europe or USA, local girls there seem gigantic to me. I am 162cm myself. Quite petite in height and body structure. So for me when I meet tall girls anywhere, I feel like they r elephants to be honest and how guys can be attracted to them being so tall and bulky? But some guys do, especially when on average height in european guys is 180cm and above. 

Now I have a few quite tall GFs in Singapore, and they really struggle here to get just sex, not even a BF. Cause for majority of guys here they r gigantic simply. 

One way to solve this problem is to move to a country where your height is normal. I saw foreign guys 175cm height dating absolutely stunning local asian girls that I don't think they would be able to get if they were in Europe somewhere. 

Yes. Girls prefer taller guys. It's some kind of biology or something. For example for me personally, even that i am 162cm tall, I just don't feel feminine enough next to a shorter guy. I feel more like he is my buddy or a boy rather than a man. I am sorry bit its just how I feel. But I agree with Emerald here that for some shorter girls, maybe 150-160cm height, if a guy is 175cm, is already quite tall for them. So they r feeling good next to a guy. 

Conclusion. 

U need to work on your self esteem first and foremost and then seek girls that a shorter than you and for whom your height will be perfect. Just imagine a 150cm girl with 190cm dude, too big of a difference 🤣🤣🤣🤣 will need to jump to kiss him 😂😂😂

 

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I hope you will seek help. height  isnt as  big  of a  problem as you think. Im 5'4 and  i like to date guys that arent all that tall.

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@InsecureAnon None of this stuff you read of this thread will help you your to lost in Blackpill/Incel ideology. Take some time of girls and go get therapy or deeply reflect your tramas. Be aware of how by consuming shit information and engaging with said community will unconsciously shape your beliefs and trick you into believing its your own original thought when all it is is dogma.

Unsubscribe from all incel/black pill/redpill forums, youtube channels or any other medium you follow that shit is garbage and when a person with insecurities comes across like that stuff it only goes down hill.

Your facing a much bigger problem than just getting laid you need to reinvent your character it reeks of insecurity and desperation and this is through the internet so in real life it must be worse. Women are social creatures and can pick this up before you speak.

You need a wake up call bro, right now you have your youth and freedom to properly explore this avenue of your life don't spend it bitching on some online forum about being average height good luck

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9 hours ago, RendHeaven said:

Nah, his delusions need to be laughed at. Hard.

Calmly telling him why he's wrong won't change him.

I mean, just look at his responses so far lol. His head is totally buried in the sand.

I lean toward the empathetic/compassionate route myself in most occasions, but let's not discount the need for direct, no-bullshit retorts.

I mean seriously? You're going to kill yourself because your body is ONE INCH shorter than the average male height (5'9)? That's fucking ridiculous.

It's actually offensive towards people with actual physical disabilities.

The lack of respect towards his mother who birthed him is palpable.

If I were in a one-on-one conversation with him face-to-face, I wouldn't be so harsh. Because there I could actually show him empathy, compassion, and energetic love. But on an online forum where all he sees is a wall of text, he needs to be slapped. Coddling him here does nothing.

@InsecureAnon Girls swerve you because you're drenched in insecurity. You stink of it. They don't give a shit about your fucking height lmao. You're so damn insecure it's so obvious. You even put "insecure" in your online name lmao. I bet the girls IRL feel the insecurity seeping out of you the second they look at you, you don't even have to open your mouth. It's like you walk around in a gaseous fog of self-hatred. That automatically deletes anything good you've got going for you. Girls reject you for your self-hatred before they even register the notion of height.

So become secure. This is something you have power over. Prove me wrong. Prove us all wrong. Become strong. Get the women of your dreams. It's possible. Just become secure. There are plenty of resources online. Get studying'. Act on any confidence/self-love tips you learn. Literally go to YouTube right now and search "confidence."

You can do it.

Leo had just written “lol” at first. And since Leo has a lot of influence on certain members of his audience, he would be wise to orient to people’s suicidal ideation in a more sensitive way. Really anybody should... but especially Leo within this context.

But I firmly disagree with you about laughing at someone’s body dysmorphia, self-esteem issues, and suicidal ideation as an effective way to deal with that.

Tough love can and often does backfire in these cases... most cases actually.

There are people out there who are thin as a toothpick and starve themselves to death because they genuinely believe that they’re fat.

Why wouldn’t there also be men of average height that believe they’re short?


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7 minutes ago, Emerald said:

Tough love can and often does backfire in these cases... most cases actually.

There are people out there who are thin as a toothpick and starve themselves to death because they genuinely believe that they’re fat.

Why wouldn’t there also be men of average height that believe they’re short?

Such a beautiful way of summarising it. True, tough love is wasted when it's used recklessly.


 INFJ loner... .shy girl.. 

Quick access to journal entries

 

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@InsecureAnon Hey I can relate but from a different angle.

When I was 19, I'm 25 now, I got really insecure about my hair potentially falling out. It kinda happened over night, one day I noticed my hairline and then I realized based on my genetics I'd be bald young and I completely snapped. I got depressed for a full year and I basically went into a hole.

Everytime I would look at a guy I'd analyze their hairline. I could tell if someone was going bald, early recession, perfect hairline etc it was a disaster. I would look in the mirror all the time to hyper analyze my hairline and I couldn't go a day without it consuming my entire thought process. 

When I finally got over it, to a large extent i'm not fully over it, I basically 180'd my thought process and life, and let me tell you man I was never so happy in my entire life. I reached a point where I felt like a completely different person and I couldn't even remember the old version of my self. I reached a place of great equanimity with my hairline and my overall view of myself and my ability to function skyrocketed.

You can also 180 your thoughts and feelings towards your height. They key is acceptance and embracing everything associated with being your height. You must love your self at 5ft8. If you think someone who is 6ft + is happy and loving, then imagine you were that height and how you would feel about yourself if you were that height. You can also look for people who are 5ft8 or below that you admire and respect. I remember I was obsessed with Michael Jordan motivational videos because he was a badass bald guy. I realized Michael Jordan was the apex of a human and bald, so I could also reach that level. These are just examples, they may or may not work for you.

But fundamentally you must accept and love every part of you that you have gone to war with over your height. Notice all the negative thoughts and feelings associated with your height, and love and accept them. Those thoughts and feelings can be welcomed like guests entering a house. 

It's not going to happen over night, but once you get rolling the results can occur astonishingly quickly. I went from obsessed about my hairline and miserable to functional and feeling better than I ever had in less than 2 weeks.

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16 minutes ago, Emerald said:

Leo had just written “lol” at first. And since Leo has a lot of influence on certain members of his audience, he would be wise to orient to people’s suicidal ideation in a more sensitive way. Really anybody should... but especially Leo within this context.

But I firmly disagree with you about laughing at someone’s body dysmorphia, self-esteem issues, and suicidal ideation as an effective way to deal with that.

Tough love can and often does backfire in these cases... most cases actually.

There are people out there who are thin as a toothpick and starve themselves to death because they genuinely believe that they’re fat.

Why wouldn’t there also be men of average height that believe they’re short?

@Emerald @RendHeaven

I can speak to this from direct experience. In the story I wrote above what sparked my motivation to change was my dad yelling at me and threatening to kick me out. I came home late one night and my dad got mad at me and made some off hand comment, I didn't think he was actually going to kick me out, but it caused some deep fear/worry that kinda woke me up and motivated me.

I disagree with how Leo approached the comments, I bet he would regret that comment if this guy actually harmed himself, but there is something to be said for saying/doing something that cuts deep to shake people like this out of whatever emotional/mental web they are caught in.

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@Emerald You cannot help someone who doesn't wanna be helped. In this case, the dude presented it in such a way that it's obvious his mind is already made up. I'm short=I have no chance. What can you do? He either challenges these beliefs, or will continue to wallow in his sad bullshit.

Btw, in this case, I don't believe he actually plans to kill himself. Heck, I've felt like killing myself a couple of times, but I never did it. Because ofc, the fear of death is always greater than the pain. Simple. He's clearly cappin'. The people that actually kill themselves, don't tend to tell anyone about it. They just do it.

As for his actual problem, the dude clearly has no fucking confidence and self esteem. You can't simultaneously hold 2 contradictory beliefs as true. "I've tried my best, I tried to funny, charismatic" (I'm not quoting) on one hand, and then he goes on saying how he believes he's undersirable because he's 5'7 lol. He was clearly never all that charismatic, was he? You can't be on your A game, AND believe you're an ugly MFer at the same time🤣

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