Higher vibration, Getting serious, Regrounding

[Striving for more]

Girl text me back. 

But only the money & the lifestyle will keep em. 

Can't put my focus in the gym again. 

Just martial arts & soccer cos I love em. But nada mas. 

Well a little workout here & there, some push ups & sit ups in the monring. 

But fuck being a bodybuilder. 

Books money experience charisma the juice is worth the squeeze. 

Higher vibration.

I JUST BOUGHT A CHEESEBURGER FROM MACDONALDS. 

Next time I wanna buy it I give it to homeless guy. 

next tinme I wanna waste money it goes to the guy from siria fleeing with no freedom.

How the fuck could I waste the chance I got? 

How the fuck could I not get rich not be an inspiration how the fuck could I not chase high quality women & how the fuck could I put random girls on a pedastal how the fuck could I spend hard earnt money on a frappe ?

And I go club some girls I try chat to but their personality so ugly, 

All for a fucking frappe?

Did I carry boxes in the rain feeling shit for years just for a fucking frappe? 

Isn't there more to life than a frappy? 

Nonononono. My life has more meaning than that. 

GIrl actually texted me back. Wow, I gotta try not mess this one up.

I need to keep building my life up, can't be like those wastemen sitting around in macdonalds with no purpose. 

Get fluent, get rich get more interesting gain more value learn how to save a life learn science learn biology become less autisitc so much shit I wanna do. 

But I gotta respect myself & stop the infeorirty complex. 

I gotta be grateful for the chance I got. 

I can't waste this life. 

I'm done journalling again. 

I took a week off but I don't have time for this. 

I just leave on this note. There is litterally no time for depression or negativity, there's no time to have low self esteem. 

You have to think you're the boss or you don't even have a chance, I'm not deluded life's tough but you want the greatest chance then assume your the fucking boss & start acting like it. 

I have to keep this mentality. 

I cant waste this life. 

It weren't all for an ugly girl and a frappe. Life is more than this.