Preety_India

I want to become more Selfish

101 posts in this topic

22 minutes ago, Byun Sean said:

Well I guess the first question to act yourself is what is blocking you from meeting your own needs in these situations right now?

 

The reason you can't act more 'selfish' is because you have a certain fear behind what will happen if you do. Only you can know/ figure out what that is.

 

 

There seems to be an underlying need you're meeting that is taking priority over meeting your other needs.

 

Your job is to introspect and figure out what that block/ fear is so you can consciously choose what needs to meet rather than unconsciously.

 

 

This was extremely insightful almost psychologically going deeper into my psyche. Great job at dissecting my thought. Even I can't do it. 

I really need to introspect on whatever you brought up.

Thanks for pointing me in that direction. I just wasn't aware. So your post really helped me notice that.

 


 INFJ loner... .shy girl.. 

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Posted (edited)

17 minutes ago, SamC said:

1: Stop with the ruler techniques, I tried to help you.

2: You need to go full circle 

 

 

5hua9z.gif

  

Sticking fingers in my ears.

5hua99.gif

 

Edited by Preety_India

 INFJ loner... .shy girl.. 

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@SamC displaced memes of memes - sometimes come across shallow - if you do that has nothing to do with selfishness or selflessness it somehow just showes shallow reactiveness instead of self reflection on your side.

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5 minutes ago, mememe said:

@SamC displaced memes of memes - sometimes come across shallow - if you do that has nothing to do with selfishness or selflessness it somehow just showes shallow reactiveness instead of self reflection on your side.

@mememe Then Leo is the head master of selfishness:P


"Sometimes when it's dark - we have to be the light in our own tunnel"

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@SamC it has nothing to do with selfishness or selflessness.

at least he seldomly displaces them.

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Posted (edited)

@mememe

At least I don't have a meme in my name :P you must be a very reactive shallow person!:xXDXD

Edited by SamC

"Sometimes when it's dark - we have to be the light in our own tunnel"

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Posted (edited)

@SamC yeah i know it’s funny, isn’t it - but if you can’t use my time better than trying to get fast triggered reaction i might have to put you on the ignore list. what you do with your time is your own thing.

Edited by mememe

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Posted (edited)

58 minutes ago, mememe said:

@SamC yeah i know it’s funny, isn’t it - but if you can’t use my time better than trying to get fast triggered reaction i might have to put you on the ignore list. what you do with your time is your own thing.

@mememe It's all jokes my manXDXD don't take my playfulness the wrong way. Lots of love towards you! Have a nice day

Edited by SamC

"Sometimes when it's dark - we have to be the light in our own tunnel"

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1 hour ago, Preety_India said:

 

 

5hua9z.gif

  

Sticking fingers in my ears.

5hua99.gif

 

:x

I'm the one to the right XDXD


"Sometimes when it's dark - we have to be the light in our own tunnel"

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5 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

Yup. You're the one preaching into my ears. And I refuse to listen.

Oh you mean it like that. I thought the meems where for shit and giggles XDXD. I am sorry if that's your experience, it's not what I am trying to do. I am trying to help you but it's very hard to help you when you don't want to listen and instead say that I am preaching when I give you my perspective and what I genuinely belive would help you. You don't have to consider it as true or helpful but realize I am not trying to preach to you - I am trying to help you, and if someone would do that to me, I would be thankful, for whatever I got, eventhough it might not be helpful.

You're the one asking for help here and then when you get help you put your head in the sand and say that the other person's advice sucks and is preaching.


"Sometimes when it's dark - we have to be the light in our own tunnel"

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Posted (edited)

10 minutes ago, SamC said:

Oh you mean it like that. I thought the meems where for shit and giggles XDXD. I am sorry if that's your experience, it's not what I am trying to do. I am trying to help you but it's very hard to help you when you don't want to listen and instead say that I am preaching when I give you my perspective and what I genuinely belive would help you. You don't have to consider it as true or helpful but realize I am not trying to preach to you - I am trying to help you, and if someone would do that to me, I would be thankful, for whatever I got, eventhough it might not be helpful.

You're the one asking for help here and then when you get help you put your head in the sand and say that the other person's advice sucks and is preaching.

Yes. When I don't feel like it's helpful to me, I should say it as I feel it. What's the point of hiding and simply agree to something that I don't feel like agreeing from my heart ?

I would much rather prefer to speak truthfully to you than make you feel better about helping me when it's not actually helping me. 

By the way I am grateful for your kindness you show to me. No complaining there uncle sam.

You would have become a great boyfriend to me if you were living close to me. But we would have fought a lot over little things. Hehe.

 

Edited by Preety_India

 INFJ loner... .shy girl.. 

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2 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

Yes. When I don't feel like it's helpful to me, I should say it as I feel it. What's the point of hiding and simply agree to something that I don't feel like agreeing from my heart ?

I would much rather prefer to speak truthfully to you than make you feel better about helping me when it's not actually helping me. 

Agreed! (:

Quote

By the way I am grateful for your kindness you show to me. No complaining there uncle sam.

This is all I wanted. Thank you. It felt like you thought that I wanted to preach and not help you/ wanted to hurt you. This makes me feel understood!

 

 


"Sometimes when it's dark - we have to be the light in our own tunnel"

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Just now, SamC said:

Agreed! (:

This is all I wanted. Thank you. It felt like you thought that I wanted to preach and not help you/ wanted to hurt you. This makes me feel understood!

 

 

Ok I'm sorry if I hurt you. I don't mean to at all. You understand me a bit better than most people on the forum. And also you're mostly kind to me, which I appreciate despite the disagreements we run into.

 


 INFJ loner... .shy girl.. 

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@SamC Bit of a trickster eh? ;)

@Preety_India Part of this journey is to become aware of our triggers and freeing ourselves from them, that's our responsibility, and to not rely on others tiptoeing around them. 

Sure, people deliver stuff wrapped in sarcasm, irony, seemingly controlling directness, blunt telling you that you're wrong and them right, down-right disrespectful behaviors, and so on - AND - we can emotionally detach ourselves from all of that :)

You seemingly do get triggered a lot. Have you taken time to sit down and reflect over what triggers you have, and create the intention for yourself to free yourself from their clasps?

This is something that we inevitably need to work on, and the sooner we have this realization the better, the sooner we become free the better, since it causes a lot of energy to get misdirected, and also muddy the water so that we don't see clearly in general.

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@Preety_India :)

Luckily we can choose to create intention to unwind ourselves. It just doesn't happen without creating the intention and working towards it, catching ourselves in that moment and choose a different path.

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@Preety_India Are you sure you need as much a pat on your back as a kick in your butt xD

I sure needed the kick in the butt, and life gave it to me, eventually. Life beat me to a pulp before I was able to open my eyes.

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