capriciousduck

Getting Triggered

66 posts in this topic

13 hours ago, capriciousduck said:

Today is my 6th day of nofap. Are there any other things that I have to put in my mind always to keep the nofap going? I mean If one thinks into future what obstacles there would be to pull me into jerking off again? I mean any scientifically proven things that do pull me back again? Like homeostasis? Chaser effect?

@capriciousduck Ah I missed that part.

Don't worry about scientifically proven things that pull you back, because that is not helpful to you. Notice how every sciency fact creates an excuse in your mind.

I recommend staying clean for 3 weeks, so the addiction is broken, and then teaching yourself carefully and slowly to masturbate without working towards ejaculation and without porn. Look up "tantric masturbation". It's much more sustainable than sexual repression.

Don't spend time on nofap reddits or communities. That's a trap. Just shift your attention to a different subject.

Those books will help.

Also if you slip, just start over and try to have as little negative emotions about it as possible. Negative emotions fuel addiction.

My "cycle" of days in between ejaculations looks typically like 10 days, 3, 1, 30, 14, 42, 1, 1, 25, 48, etc. I don't emotionally punish myself when I slip up. That's the key.


I help adults with ADD to overcome self-doubt, function optimally and live their dreams through my proprietary coaching program.

https://calendly.com/erik-coaching/add-coaching-free-strategy-consult

Besides that, ♂ I offer single breakthrough calls for men on social life, dating, relationships and sexuality.

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@flowboy Did you ever heard of Holotropic Breathwork? It says, I mean, I read a few articles and have come to know that the breathing releases negative or suppressed energies. But it's said that it is an intensive breathing. Do you have any experience with it?

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Posted (edited)

37 minutes ago, capriciousduck said:

@flowboy Did you ever heard of Holotropic Breathwork? It says, I mean, I read a few articles and have come to know that the breathing releases negative or suppressed energies. But it's said that it is an intensive breathing. Do you have any experience with it?

Some. I'd definitely like to do a proper holotropic breathwork workshop, never done that. What I've done is "circular breathing", which is basically what Leo describes in his "shamanic breathing" video, but slower and through the nose, and with nicer music.

It does release suppressed energies for sure. The first months when I used to do it, I always cried halfway through. Now, those emotions seem to have been released, because it doesn't usually make me cry these days. Just gives me a sense of childlike freshness and appetite for life.

And for some people it can be a good tool to get clear on their vision, and feel into what they truly want out of life.

If you feel drawn to it, it's a great thing to do.

 

Perhaps you could even use it as a deconditioning agent: doing it when the urge to get an ejaculation becomes strong. For the first 3 weeks or so. Although this is just an idea, not something I've tried.

These days I even watch porn on occasion. It's not that addictive anymore. Not even super interesting, when I'm on 28 days of not-cumming. So I can enjoy looking at it from time to time without becoming addicted or losing my energy.

Took me quite some time and failed attempts to get there, though. So definitely a more advanced level.

Still, I notice that the images stick in my mind and pollute it, so it's still not a great thing.

Maybe it's good to know that cutting things out completely is good at a beginner level, but less necessary once you've recalibrated.

Edited by flowboy

I help adults with ADD to overcome self-doubt, function optimally and live their dreams through my proprietary coaching program.

https://calendly.com/erik-coaching/add-coaching-free-strategy-consult

Besides that, ♂ I offer single breakthrough calls for men on social life, dating, relationships and sexuality.

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@capriciousduck  Great! You made it 10 days, that's more than many of my friends can do.

On 26/07/2021 at 8:58 AM, flowboy said:

I don't emotionally punish myself when I slip up. That's the key.

You have to stop yourself from feeling bad about a slip-up, or you'll never be able to be consistent.

Counter-intuitive, but essential


I help adults with ADD to overcome self-doubt, function optimally and live their dreams through my proprietary coaching program.

https://calendly.com/erik-coaching/add-coaching-free-strategy-consult

Besides that, ♂ I offer single breakthrough calls for men on social life, dating, relationships and sexuality.

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I' m 24. This time I got a bit less thick semen, kind of watery. What does that mean? In the past once I was for 26 days without nofap. Should I continue the streak or start from the beginning?

And, yes, for two days I felt slight pain in my balls and that's why I think I relapsed. Is that could be the reason or something else?

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1 minute ago, capriciousduck said:

This time I got a bit less thick semen, kind of watery. What does that mean?

Nothing.

2 minutes ago, capriciousduck said:

Should I continue the streak or start from the beginning?

Start from the beginning, but without feeling bad about it.

2 minutes ago, capriciousduck said:

And, yes, for two days I felt slight pain in my balls and that's why I think I relapsed.

That goes away.


I help adults with ADD to overcome self-doubt, function optimally and live their dreams through my proprietary coaching program.

https://calendly.com/erik-coaching/add-coaching-free-strategy-consult

Besides that, ♂ I offer single breakthrough calls for men on social life, dating, relationships and sexuality.

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@flowboy OK. I'll start again. Just to make sure, no pornography, no masturbation, no ejaculation for 3 weeks, right?

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Yep. After that, you can carefully introduce some tantric masturbation. (without porn, mindful, slow, no ejaculation)

If you master that, and do it once in a while, you can keep your energy indefinitely without having this unhealthy sexual suppression.


I help adults with ADD to overcome self-doubt, function optimally and live their dreams through my proprietary coaching program.

https://calendly.com/erik-coaching/add-coaching-free-strategy-consult

Besides that, ♂ I offer single breakthrough calls for men on social life, dating, relationships and sexuality.

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Posted (edited)

7 minutes ago, capriciousduck said:

@flowboy I'm curious to know how you would respond to this. Kind of conflicting ideas.

https://qr.ae/pGMzVA

I'm confused.

So the way to deal with conflicting information is:

  1. find out for yourself if at all possible , and
  2. judge people by what they have done, accomplished and actually experienced

You've tried the old way. Now you can try something else, and see how it is for you. If you're on a 50 day streak, incorporating healthy tantric masturbation every week, and you don't see any benefits for yourself, then you should go back.

The thing you posted was written by someone who clearly has never experienced what I'm talking about. But that doesn't stop him from being loud with his opinion. But it's not based in experience.

 

Edited by flowboy

I help adults with ADD to overcome self-doubt, function optimally and live their dreams through my proprietary coaching program.

https://calendly.com/erik-coaching/add-coaching-free-strategy-consult

Besides that, ♂ I offer single breakthrough calls for men on social life, dating, relationships and sexuality.

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Posted (edited)

@flowboy After a while of introspection I found out that I dont want to let go of my addictive behavior(I mean liking pornography) because I like it so much. And that is why I'm struggling to let go of it. Now, is there a way to start disliking it so that I can put an end to it?

Edited by capriciousduck
Just made the question more clear

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On 7/25/2021 at 9:27 AM, capriciousduck said:

Today is my 6th day of nofap. Are there any other things that I have to put in my mind always to keep the nofap going? I mean If one thinks into future what obstacles there would be to pull me into jerking off again? I mean any scientifically proven things that do pull me back again? Like homeostasis? Chaser effect?

Yes, its all about what your exposing your mind to. I was on day 108 and 110 of Semen Retention or No fap. Streak going well. As for scientifically proven stuff? fuck that. Just refrained from dating apps, porn, and most media, I read books, and watched Leo videos, went to work, the gym, meditation, and only exposed my mind to spiritual and developmental work for the entire first 100 days, This was easy for me since that was already my normal habits I just removed porn. Days 0-14 Are challenging to break the mental patterns of urges, but when you do, you get to a new baseline and you basically go about your days with healthy habits. Staying super mindful of your urges and let them go and stay on the task of retention.14-30 Stay focused on your goals and discipline yourself. Let your willpower build and strengthen. Do not act on any urges let them pass. Day 30-60 For me anyway I basically forgot all about it and the habit was completely gone. It may be different if you have a more habitual pattern established. Day 60-70, New baseline reached, You feel more inner power and discipline, and focus. Around Day 80 is where the real benefits emerge, (Its like to create a reference example), If you ever seen Dragon Ball Z the episode when Gohan and Goku go into the hyperbolic time chamber to prepare to fight cell, when they emerge they come out with a sustained Super Saiyan form that is effortless to maintain (Youtube has a clip of it) . Day 80 feels like that! Your in a new state of consciousness, You have radiant energy, concentration and ability to complete tasks is flawless, ability to think clearly is enhanced, confidence is raised, females become very attracted to you and gravitate to be in your presence. Men will look at you with a sense of automatic respect, its quite profound. There will be intense sexual energy that begins to move from your balls up your body into your head and even visual consciousness, by this I mean things look vibrant and alive almost as if on a mild dose of LSD. You become highly sensitive to those around you and can read people quite well with accuracy. I think they call it sexual transmutation but i didnt need to know that to experience it. However this state does not last long but it was long enough that its worth a second attempt to experience it again if your streak breaks, Day 90 The high of the "Super Saiyan" energy has died down. This is when the sexual energy becomes quite intense and nearly unbearable. My goal was to reach 100 Days and then allow myself to mingle with woman, bonus came with my new energy level. So i spent the next few days on dating apps swiping and talking to cute girls. This is where I say its all about what your exposing your mind to. During the remaining 8 days I was on these apps and on the 108th day I had a nocturnal emission which completely dropped me from that energy high. You become hyper sensitive to sexual stimuli at this level, and I had exposed my mind to sexual ideas which clearly effected my ability to retain. I know semen does recycle after a certain amount of time but this feels directly related to the fact I was on the dating apps and thinking about sex, I repeated this entire process once again for another 110 days, but didnt remain as disciplined on the dating apps after 100 days, due to the level of sexual energy that becomes charged after 80-90 days which was way more intense the second time around, also due to an increased in female attention, I experienced the same results with the nocturnal emission on day 110, so even if you stay disciplined your subconscious mind still has a say so, if you can become aware in your dreams you can noticed if you have sexual dreams and try to wake yourself up before its too late. I had to do this a few times, but the one time i failed to wake up and a nocturnal emission occurred, when that happens is when I hook up with a girl, since that retention period has ended. Sex is even more appreciated and experienced much deeper level. Blowing a load of 110 days of backed up semen into some kewchie is the best thing ever lol. To confirm my assumption that my body automatically releases sperm around 108-110 days I will begin my 3rd session of retention to verify, but my current conclusion is the body will release your streak at some point regardless, so have a clear purpose for your retention because for me it was to attain that heightened state indefinitely but since my body is going to automatically release the sperm any way and that energy level will be lost once again or doesn't become long term sustainable then grinding that many days for that specific benefit is pointless and not the motivation you want. But it is worth to have the experience of a natural state change within consciousness with no psychedelics, If you want the ability to have great will power and discipline this will be the way to do it as that increase has stayed with me. Unless your trying to become celibate just retain till you can have sex again, drop porn forever. So key take aways,

1.Refrain from any sexually triggering stimuli, porn, dating apps, movies with anything sexual, watch out for any click-bate if you watch YouTube. Anything that might wanna store itself in your subconscious

2.Keep focused on your personal development and spiritual development what ever is you do. Work out, Eat Healthy. Maintain your discipline.

3.Meditate every day.

4. Practice Mindfulness at all times to allow conscious "letting go" of triggering thoughts, to not act on them.

5 If you want an end goal to motivate you to keep up the streak, try making it to 100 days then have sex because its totally worth it, chances are your going to have an automatic semen release soon anyway so you might as well release it during sex only. so dont waste that energy that woman will become attracted to. 

6.If you fuck up, Do Not overthink it! Just start over and pretend like nothing happened. Continue your practices and development habits.

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On 1-8-2021 at 7:07 PM, capriciousduck said:

@flowboy After a while of introspection I found out that I dont want to let go of my addictive behavior(I mean liking pornography) because I like it so much. And that is why I'm struggling to let go of it. Now, is there a way to start disliking it so that I can put an end to it?

A very important realisation, congratulations.

The solution is counter-intuitive. Disliking would make it worse, because there would still be repressed like.

Instead, bring your liking of it into conscious awareness.

Enjoy and be aware of every aspect. The pleasure. The pain. The shame. The negative self-talk. The slight dip in energy. Enjoy and love it all, as if it were the most spiritual experience.

That is how you can let it go.

Why? Because your subconscious will make you repeat an experience until every facet of it is consciously experienced. The good, the bad and the ugly.


I help adults with ADD to overcome self-doubt, function optimally and live their dreams through my proprietary coaching program.

https://calendly.com/erik-coaching/add-coaching-free-strategy-consult

Besides that, ♂ I offer single breakthrough calls for men on social life, dating, relationships and sexuality.

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