KaRzual

How do i let go of control?

39 posts in this topic

@Mason Riggle Okay i get it. But it would be easier to feel that i have no control at all and enjoy life that way. 

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4 minutes ago, Mason Riggle said:

 Do I want coffee or tea? I guess I'll know the answer the moment it occurs to me, and no sooner. 

Good one. Okay, as silly as it sounds - i have nothing more to do apart from what i'm doing right now. Lessss go!

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On 7/15/2021 at 10:59 AM, Mason Riggle said:

@KaRzual this is annoyingly paradoxical stuff..  

You want to know 'how to let go of control', and 'letting go of control' can (is within the infinite possibilities of infinity) happen, but it will happen if and only if, and when and only when it does, and none of that is 'up to you'. 

It's similar to looking at an image full of other hidden images.. and I say, 'do you see the cat?'.. and you say, no, how do I see it?   There is nothing you can do to 'cause yourself to see it before you see it.'.  

You can discover it on your own, if and when you do.. or I could point it out, if and when I do.. neither are up to you. 

You nailed this explanation man. It literally lines up an ego to see get that its really all just spontaneous. "People" are either already on the path because it spontaneously happened to "them" or "they're" not and "they're" juggling ideas "they" heard from "others" on the path talk about it and now its a thought/belief and becomes an "object" of desire to those who haven't gotten it, until they do, which occurs spontaneously. 


Focus on the solution, not the problem

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Here's an inquiry you might try:

Is everything really just happening?

Until phenomena once seen as actions done by you (such as speaking) are felt to be on the same level as anything else (such as wind blowing through the trees).

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On 15/7/2021 at 4:11 PM, Mason Riggle said:

@KaRzual I like practicing mindfulness (present moment awareness).  Practice staying very present.  Practice noticing what is true Now.. notice the sensations you are feeling now. Notice what sounds you are hearing now. Notice what thoughts you are thinking now.  This is what I mean by 'paying close attention to the present moment'.   

Notice that if you are thinking about the future, that is a thought occurring now.  Notice that if you are thinking about the past, or remembering something, that is also just more thought occurring now.  Notice that you have no idea what thought will occur to you next.  What will you think next? You won't know until it arises.  Recognize that everything, including your own thoughts, is simply happening, and you are becoming aware of it in each moment.  

Isn’t a practice a form of control ? 

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I suggest you to first start getting in actual control of what you focus your mind on, where your attention goes throughout the day and what emotion you're acting upon.

Learn to choose consciously and deliberately what direction your mind is taking and you will get your hands on the wheel regarding what direction your whole life is going as well.

Then, as you become 'your own boss' in regards to 'your dream', it all gets better, it's like in a lucid dream. Once you get in control by becoming more and more aware & awake, you finally start enjoying the surprises and 'easter eggs' that your cultivated surrender enables you to experience.

To properly enjoy the spontaneity of life you have become your own master. That's when you're truly free. 

In order to surrender to 'the flow of life' you have to learn self-mastery first. 

Once you learn how to control it properly, then everything starts flowing smoothly & 'magically' and you get to actually relax and surrender.

It's like driving a car. 

First, you have to master everything about how it works.

The you're ready to go and enjoy the ride.

That's when you truly get to enjoy the amazing, divine scenery that's in front of you. 

It's like walking. You are in control now, you know how to do it so you get to soak up the sun and admire the beauty and magnificence of the park as 'you' •walk the path•(:D) as the walking 'happens by itself'. ;):x:P

Feel the waves of bliss & "dance your dance".

 

 

Edited by Anahata

"Words mean something because they point to meaning beyond themselves."

 

 

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2 hours ago, Giulio Bevilacqua said:

Isn’t a practice a form of control ? 

Meditation is anti-control. It is learning how we've been dominated by our brain/nervous system/mind/culture since birth. Dropping all judgments about phenomena and resting as you are is the essence of meditation, and subsequently, the rejection of the illusion of control.

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6 hours ago, OneHandClap said:

Meditation is anti-control. It is learning how we've been dominated by our brain/nervous system/mind/culture since birth. Dropping all judgments about phenomena and resting as you are is the essence of meditation, and subsequently, the rejection of the illusion of control.

I understand. But the decision to sit in mediation evry day for 30 minutes, is still a form of control. 

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On 7/15/2021 at 8:27 AM, KaRzual said:

So i just live my life in that case? I can medidate, build up consciousness, have nondual expieriences, but in the end i may not experience non existence of "I"?

Is there something you would like to create? Then go create it. Otherwise, just go have a cup of coffee. Coffee doesn't even exist. Go enjoy the idea of drinking a cup of coffee.

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How I see it, not controlling life is just the same as being present in the moment. As a practice you could (I'm doing this too) practice alignment with what feels best for you to do in any moment. Just let go, go with the flow, look for the option of things to do that feels best. Don't do things because of what you think it will get you, don't do things to 'make it happen', just pick the option that feels best. Could be taking a walk, watching a movie, calling a friend, etc. If you feel inspiration, go with that. Meditation is good, because it is a non-resisting activity, but going to meditate while you don't feel like it, just because you want to make it happen, is a no for me. Most humans think that 'I am here at A, and I want to go to B, so I'll have to forge my way to B from here'. With this approach you practice aligning yourself/your life with what feels good, and then the better you feel, the better things can come/are allowed to come to you. 

Edited by Waken

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3 hours ago, Giulio Bevilacqua said:

I understand. But the decision to sit in mediation evry day for 30 minutes, is still a form of control. 

Just as much as not doing so.

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On 7/15/2021 at 11:27 AM, KaRzual said:

So i just live my life in that case? I can medidate, build up consciousness, have nondual expieriences, but in the end i may not experience non existence of "I"?

The resolve of ignorance, of the “I at one end” and the “consciousness at the other end” is Meditation,  ‘the middle way’.

Thoughts arise, “can meditate, can build up consciousness, can have nondual experiences, but in the end may not experience nonexistence of, I

At first it seems like a question rooted in nonsense - who or what is this “I” spoken of ?

Via meditation, the “I” is actually realized to be one single thought at a time, which veils & hijacks the true nature, or truth… which is of course the meditation ‘itself’, the consciousness ‘itself’, the nondual ‘itself’. 

What is a self referential thought


MEDITATIONS TOOLS  ActualityOfBeing.com  GUIDANCE SESSIONS

NONDUALITY LOA  My Youtube Channel  THE TRUE NATURE

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18 hours ago, Giulio Bevilacqua said:

Isn’t a practice a form of control ? 

A lot of great replies to this already. 

Practice is a way for organisms to hone self control, but don't conflate what organisms do with a 'you' who's doing it. 

It can be quite unsettling to begin to see everything as one continuous process, all happening together, with no one 'doing' any of it, but that too shall pass

 

 

 

 

 


"I could be the walrus. I'd still have to bum rides off people."

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15 hours ago, Giulio Bevilacqua said:

I understand. But the decision to sit in mediation evry day for 30 minutes, is still a form of control. 

Who or what decides to meditate? I mean truly, deeply meditate, without expectations of progress? 

When you have the answer to this question, you will realize there never was control ;) 

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On 18.07.2021 at 4:34 AM, Kamo said:

You nailed this explanation man. It literally lines up an ego to see get that its really all just spontaneous. "People" are either already on the path because it spontaneously happened to "them" or "they're" not and "they're" juggling ideas "they" heard from "others" on the path talk about it and now its a thought/belief and becomes an "object" of desire to those who haven't gotten it, until they do, which occurs spontaneously. 

@Kamo Well this sounds like: "There's no reason to seek", which sounds like nonsense. 

 

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@KaRzual It is not easy at all. sit down to meditate, you will see that the thoughts arise. every thought is a manifestation of the need for control. to let go of control is to be in the void, with nothing to hold onto. "you", so your ego, has as its main function to be in control, for that it carries out a constant activity of thinking. It conceptualizes non-stop to get the feeling that dissecting reality and controls it. the way to stop doing this (I think, I'm on it) is to see that control is an illusion, to understand that the entire ego is an illusion. the dissecting activity of the mind provides false security. everything it says is empty. you are floating in the void and clutching imaginary handholds for fear of having nothing to grasp. you have to see that these handles are nothing, illusion, and have the courage of be without nothing to grasp 

I say that it is not easy because our mind is the heir to thousands of generations of minds that have been conditioning themselves to completely need to hold on to firm imaginary handholds. no control is the last thing your mind is willing to accept. is going to change one handle for another. conscience, god ... whatever. the point is that this mind is penetrating enough to know that what it is doing is false. it is the mind itself that knows that it must leave control, since with it it is locked in a jail that only serves to suffer. the mind has to see it and surrender, I can think of no other way except psychedelics

 

Edited by Breakingthewall

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Through meditation you may begin to recognize your own thoughts coming on the exact same way the chirping of a bird does.. every bit of 'your experience' arising into awareness, with no 'you' who's doing any of it. 

Reality happens. 


"I could be the walrus. I'd still have to bum rides off people."

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@KaRzual You create the notion of a reason. Its really up to you if you want. A reason isnt really necessary unless you imagine the need for one.


Focus on the solution, not the problem

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