Dumping my negative emotions

Preety_India · July 6, 2021

I have suffered enough in life.

I feel like giving up.

My family is horrible..

And growing up that way left me with horrible scars.

Preety_India · July 7, 2021

Today my mother again gave me death threats.

It's just impossible to live with this abusive person.

I feel anxious living with this pathetic toxic woman who ruined the life of my dad and drove him to his death.

Preety_India · July 8, 2021

I have suffered extensive abuse from the age of 9 and still do

I will win this struggle against abuse

Preety_India · July 9, 2021

I'll keep working hard till the day I get freedom from all the abuse I suffered and keep suffering.

Yesterday she slapped across my face when I left my room

Then at first it didn't feel anything.

I have even lost my memory because of the stress.

Next day I felt something on my face.

So I looked in the mirror and there was a bruise.

Only later I realized she had put her nails into my face.

Those nails had created bruises on my face.

I tried to push her off but she gets monstrous energy in her arms.

She held my arm and kept twisting it till I screamed very loudly.

I pleaded her to leave me alone.

Then she pushed me on the floor and left me.

My whole body was bruised and I kept crying.

I kept screaming that this is domestic violence.

Violence that I witnessed her doing to my dad when I was a child.

Nobody ever did anything to her because she would threaten.

I remember everyone being scared of her

My dad had suffered in silence.

She is very strong. I just cannot match her strength.

Yesterday I told my neighbor that she hit me.

They don't believe me even if I showed them my injuries on my arm.

She looks old with grey hair

They told me that it's not possible for her to hit me.

They asked me why I didn't hit her back.

I told them that I just froze out of fear.

I go into freeze mode every time she physically assaults me.

It is impossible to think anything.

I don't know if I can hit her because she can land me in jail. People will believe her but they won't believe me

One thing she uses as a powerful weapon is tears.

She will act like a monster with me but start crying like a feeble woman in public and I will watch helplessly because I'm the victim of her violence but she will pretend like she was the victim.

This is her nature where she can quickly change from a violent monster to a hapless victim in seconds.

What I suffered with her is plain narcissistic abuse

Narcissists have a different face in public and a different face behind closed doors.

She can swiftly make everything work in her favor

I try to fight back as much as possible.

So far resisting her has worked.

I'm trying to get rid of the fear she put in me since childhood.

Every time I see her face, I go into freeze mode.

Sign In

Dumping my negative emotions

4 posts in this topic

Share this post

Link to post

Share on other sites

Share this post

Link to post

Share on other sites

Share this post

Link to post

Share on other sites

Share this post

Link to post

Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

Create an account

Sign in