StarStruck

I didn't kiss on the second date

117 posts in this topic

19 minutes ago, StarStruck said:

I don't have a lot of experience with women.

This is good news because all that means is you just need more experience. Stop stressing over catching a single girl and focus on gaining experience. Enjoy the process. Later in life you will look back on these days as some of the best times in your life, where you were taking action and progressing quickly.


You are God. You are Truth. You are Love. You are Infinity.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Try to detach from the outcome. Stop caring about if it's going to work or if she likes you. In fact, be excited about being rejected. It means you won't have wasted time on somebody who doesn't really like you. Would you want to be with some one who doesn't like you? I sure fucking hope not. ;)

Set a standard for what you want in a woman and be ready to leave if she doesn't meet it. 

Don't be afraid to disagree or assert your opinion.

Also be careful not to idolize beautiful women. They are no more inherently valuable than an average looking woman.

Treat her like a normal human being. Not some princess or a museum piece.

Being a "nice guy" is a manipulation. She senses that you aren't being honest about your intentions. You are in a sense lying to her. So be honest with her. Show her you want her. Shamelessly.

If you are uncomfortable being sexual, then you need to overcome your sexual shadow.

Start loving yourself regardless of how much other's love you.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Quote

If you or any guy had sent like that  text to me, next day I wouldn't meet him as punishment. 

Not impressed. 

@Preety_India no worries. Ill take him when you dump him ? hihi

 

Edit: edit

Edited by mivafofa

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@mivafofa haha. Cute. I dumped him and he moved on and married another woman. 

It took him two years to get over me before he finally married. 

And he told me that he was marrying to forget me. 

I quickly moved on to my next  boyfriend after dumping him. 

 

 

Edited by Preety_India

INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

Cleared out ignore list today. 

..

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
10 minutes ago, Logan said:

Try to detach from the outcome. Stop caring about if it's going to work or if she likes you. In fact, be excited about being rejected. It means you won't have wasted time on somebody who doesn't really like you. Would you want to be with some one who doesn't like you? I sure fucking hope not. ;)

Set a standard for what you want in a woman and be ready to leave if she doesn't meet it. 

Don't be afraid to disagree or assert your opinion.

Also be careful not to idolize beautiful women. They are no more inherently valuable than an average looking woman.

Treat her like a normal human being. Not some princess or a museum piece.

Being a "nice guy" is a manipulation. She senses that you aren't being honest about your intentions. You are in a sense lying to her. So be honest with her. Show her you want her. Shamelessly.

If you are uncomfortable being sexual, then you need to overcome your sexual shadow.

Start loving yourself regardless of how much other's love you.

Sure thing. There are a lot of good looking women but there are a not a lot of women that look great and also have depth and think about life on a deep level.

I feel like there won't be any other girls like her. Meeting girls is not easy for me and getting hotties with brains is even more difficult.

It was really thanks to pickup I got her. Without pickup I would never know her. I did some pickup this week and it didn't go well so I'm thinking "she is a dime and I shouldn't lose her".

For me bring a girl into my life is like bringing a dynamite in my life. All the flaws in my life and my personality get exposed and I know that if I want her in my life (or any other girl), I need to fix my life.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hey, to give your support.

I was on my third date with a really hot, clever feminine 23 yo girl. I still didn't kiss her.

Why?

I didn't feel like it. Otherwise I was keeping it light and fun, she was initiating touch. We were laughing the whole date with a genuine connection. After the date she texted me, she was glad to meet me. 

Why not kissing works on really hot women?

I guess it gets to their head, everyone wants to try to kiss them and see if she likes them. I just know she's wet because the way I act. I show that I have balls in a lot of different ways but kissing her.

This is advanced "tactics", you can only pull it off if you truly don't give a fck what she thinks.

For me it wasn't really tactics, I'm after a breakup so I don't feel like kissing other girls yet too much.

Other reason I didn't go for a kiss is that I just finished uni, moved back to my parents house temporarily and there is no place to fck her.

I only kiss a girl if she comes up to me after a date, not on the streets where it cannot lead to sex.

Again, this might be bad advice for you, going for the kiss has cetainly its advantages. I just wanted to show you that it might not be over, it's all about how you frame and handle things.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, StarStruck said:

I don't have a lot of experience with women. This brings out a lot trauma such as being unloved and not being good with women my entire life.

Relax, as I said already there is an almost unlimited amount of beautiful women. You must understand and embody this reality in order to calm down if it doesn't work out with her for whatever reason. 

NOTE: Next date try to go for the lay, I am confident you can pull that off with that chick. 

How? Meet her as close from your apartment or wherever you plan to have sex with her as possible.

Meet her, vibe with her, get in closer, kiss her, move her around the area, pull her, nail her.

 

Edited by Harlen Kelly

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

It's never the right moment when you're not comfortable around women ?

Next time you think this way, say that you need to go to the toilet, slap yourself real hard in the face, then come back to her and kiss her ?

Most of you guys just need to stop thinking and start acting, there is nothing complicated with all of this.

 

She accept the dates = she likes you

The date goes fine = she wants you to kiss her

She lets you be alone with her in your/her apartment = she wants you to fuck her

 

Just stop thinking ?

 

Edited by Shin

God is love

Whoever lives in love lives in God

And God in them

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@Shin It's not that simple when you haven't met or interacted with women for a long time like OP. 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
2 minutes ago, Shin said:

She lets you be alone with her in your/her apartment = she wants you to fuck her

 

This sounds mildly rapey. I know of several situations where this didn’t apply in the least . 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

 

If I were a guy, I would have directly asked - do you want kiss kiss? 

No? 

 

 


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

Cleared out ignore list today. 

..

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Do you guys think I should tell her about my porn addiction and that I'm recovering right now. During lockdown I really got into porn and that made me depended on it. I'm in a flat line right now which means my dick isn't functioning. My insecurity to kiss what exactly because of this. I didn't want to pull. @Harlen Kelly @Ghost

Edited by StarStruck

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 minute ago, Harlen Kelly said:

@Shin It's not that simple when you haven't met or interacted with women for a long time like OP. 

 

It is simple but not easy.

Op made it complicated by himself in his mind.

How complicated is it to start kissing a girl ?

Don't need to do calculus, just kiss.

Just now, MatteO22 said:

This sounds mildly rapey. I know of several situations where this didn’t apply in the least . 

Most of the time it applies.

The few times it doesn't is when experience is useful to gauge the situation.

It doesn't matter anyway, you can just say you thought she wanted it, and back off, unless she's a psycho she's not gonna hold it against you.


God is love

Whoever lives in love lives in God

And God in them

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
5 minutes ago, MatteO22 said:

This sounds mildly rapey. I know of several situations where this didn’t apply in the least . 

I thought the same. 

 


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

Cleared out ignore list today. 

..

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
2 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

 

If I were a guy, I would have directly asked - do you want kiss kiss? 

No? 

 

 

She has good intentions but don't listen to her, terrible advice for most guys.

If you insist on kissing her:
Don't ask, just go for it.

She rejects you? Don't act butthurt, make fun of it, or just continue the conversation.


Try it 10-15 minutes later, more than likely she won't reject you again, why? Because now you've grown some balls in her eyes.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@StarStruck NO. Dude, you will blow this. Vibe with her, talk about topics that elevate your and her emotional state, kiss her on a high emotional state, move her around, pull her and nail her. 

Your focus should be fun and having a good time. You can get into serious stuff after you nail her, not before. 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
13 minutes ago, Shin said:

It's never the right moment when you're not comfortable around women ?

Next time you think this way, say that you need to go to the toilet, slap yourself real hard in the face, then come back to her and kiss her ?

Most of you guys just need to stop thinking and start acting, there is nothing complicated with all of this.

 

She accept the dates = she likes you

The date goes fine = she wants you to kiss her

She lets you be alone with her in your/her apartment = she wants you to fuck her

 

Just stop thinking ?

 

I know but in the moment it is hard to do it. We were sitting in the park. I could ask her if I could sit closer and it would have been a done deal, and then just size her up to see if she wants a kiss.

9 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

 

If I were a guy, I would have directly asked - do you want kiss kiss? 

No? 

 

 

Doesn't girls want romantic shit? I think, "can I sit closer?" would be a better move.

Edited by StarStruck

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Just now, Shin said:

It doesn't matter anyway, you can just say you thought she wanted it, and back off, unless she's a psycho she's not gonna hold it against you.

Dude please check yourself, it feels like you’re about to be me-tooed and Not for invalid reasons. You might benefit from sprinkling some sensitivity into your posts and such.

 

3 minutes ago, StarStruck said:

Do you guys think I should tell her about my porn addiction and that I'm recovering right now.

No that’s up to you to figure out don’t make it her problem.

7 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

 

 

If I were a guy, I would have directly asked - do you want kiss kiss? 

No? 

 

 

If you do this you heavily risk infantilising the girl which isn’t good for anyone.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
3 minutes ago, Ghost said:

She has good intentions but don't listen to her, terrible advice for most guys.

If you insist on kissing her:
Don't ask, just go for it.

She rejects you? Don't act butthurt, make fun of it, or just continue the conversation.


Try it 10-15 minutes later, more than likely she won't reject you again, why? Because now you've grown some balls in her eyes.

I don't see any harm in asking. 

In fact I would be outraged if a guy didn't ask and directly touched/kissed 

I'm like - what about consent? 

It would feel rapey especially if it's first date. 

 

Edited by Preety_India

INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

Cleared out ignore list today. 

..

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
2 minutes ago, StarStruck said:

Do you guys think I should tell her about my porn addiction and that I'm recovering right now. During lockdown I really got into porn and that made me depended on it. I'm in a flat line right now which means my dick isn't functioning. My insecurity to kiss what exactly because of this. I didn't want to pull. @Harlen Kelly @Ghost

Nooooo, don't tell her. Rather act like you have 10 other women fcking you and for that day you were just not feeling it.
This is the attraction phase, you don't have to be super honest with her.

Women hate excuses like this. Explaining yourself to her will just lower your value in her eyes.

You didn't kiss her because you haven't decided if you like her enough. 

Accept that you didn't kiss her and just be fine with it, don't make a big deal out of it. Next time you'll go for it. 

You'll be fine!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!


Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.


Sign In Now