Enlightenment experience

[Seemore]

I took a couple sips of alcohol as I was getting again familiar with a place I been many times, I had a friend who traveled the country and I would join him for better or worse many a time. I recently ended the best gf relationship I had been in and I let her go due to circumstances since I never had any money. Once I took that sip I was instantly relieved thinking my situation over and I felt love for myself and where I was at physically for the first time. I had no end to traveling and camping out as long as I continued my best friends friendship. I just came from roughly ng it on the streets and letting go of the only thing I had love for, my gf. I shared everything with her online and she never had anything to criticize. I gave my best in life and I happened to be saved by an anonymous friendship I met randomly out while hitchhiking. I think circumstances and environment play a huge part of wellbeing. So as I sipped my everlasting beer I (I am a romantic) I began to feel a deep peace within me as well as sub communication in my brain. I started to hear my ex. In the past she has foreseen my future and let me know to be open as possible in situations before they had even come up and I truly trustee her. I started to feel a oneness inside of me and such great comfort she became audible in my mind I became just grateful I had an open heart and visa versa for my entire relationship. I always allow everything to come and pass but this feeling of gratefulness started to transform into something much more universal, so to say. I looked around as my good friend was there and I just felt as everything was so alive, all the plants and the sky... I told my friend I needed to be alone for a little as it became a bit overwhelming. The feeling began to grow imensely... I could almost hear, happy plants etherial spirits, amd angels communicating to me. On my hike I was just smiling and so full of energy and love for this. Remind you I recently was down on my luck without a dollar for weeks sleeping on the street before I ran into my friend.  I started to feel like this was actually life I just missed out until now. I took it cool and went back to camp to relax and have a fantastic time. I can't recall how I felt right after that but I will tell you I went through a journey for weeks high on this love, or liberation or whatever you want to label it. Later that night I felt my chest chalkras just had a absoletely homey feel to them and I would sit there all night and talk to my ex girlfriend through telepathy. I fully believe still she was high from this as well but I was so happy and comfortable. It started irritating me when I had to go and pack my camping gear to move and converse with my friend when I didn't want to. I mean I was high on life for real. Two days pass and I was just emersed in my mind. I couldn't walk right or talk right I was overflowed with power. One night I left camp because I believed I could do just anything and I started walking through miles of desert. The moon was loving me I just started to glow in the night. I had visions of being eternal and visiting all the planets and living just forever I was so happy and responsible for this. I was in control of life itself through me. I wasn't on anything it was natural, but I have indeed chased enlightenment for many years, suffering... So I walked to the nearest civilized life, a casino, right in the middle of the desert, I finally got to smoke a cigarette and proceed to meet all these beautiful entities. (Entities is a low form of expression) I was so nervous I just walked without looking at anyone. I got to an icecream stand I decided I could stop for a second. I was so nervous it took my like5 minutes to decide what flavor I wanted. Finally I got it and guess what. As I was getting done ordering another guy came up he looked like a million dollars (I had camping clothes and a broken bookbag) he was mocking me right in my face, like looking at all ye flowers back and fourth and laughing at me. I left and I turned around and he was discreetly laughing like he found the reason he is alive or something. I pictured him as the Devil himself. I happened to leave my water where he was as I was leaving so I went and got it. After I got it I looked back and he looked like the saddest person I ever seen... I was tripping but that was a moment of human emotion at it's finest. So anyway, I left my friend I explained to him I needed to be alone and I I was back to the nitty griddy. Mind you I believed truth was everywhere to be seen by now. Long story short I believed a group of nats where all talking to me as females and I was the savior of everything and being male made me obsolete. I talked to multiple animals some calling me asshole and some appreciating me. I thought I was Jesus. I read a little bit of the Bible and started crying, I talked to girls believing I was talking to my ex, I was just talking to the universe. Long story short I am homeless right now with nowhere to sleep. Have a good night.