An exercise for the women to do if they actually want a tiny glimpse of the male POV

[Zeroguy]

46 minutes ago, 4201 said:

That's not how it works, it's not like "average" people match with "average" people and so on for any "quality" of profiles. Everyone has higher standards on Tinder because they are exposed to lots of profiles and so no one wants to choose the average one.

You can see it here: https://qz.com/1051462/these-statistics-show-why-its-so-hard-to-be-an-average-man-on-dating-apps/

Everyone targets the "top" people, if you have an average profile you stand no change. There is no such thing as an average looking person, just get a high quality camera, take a photo in which you are really happy (show your best self) and show some of your hobbies to prob get in the top 10% of profiles and have decent chances. I think for most people the difficulty is letting go of all the insecurities that are noticeable in your photos. But if you let go of all your insecurities you might as well just talk to people anywhere instead of on an app where everyone is objectified and rated.

Thank you.All I ever needed in life.Greatful.Maybe I will finally find someone.

Edited April 29, 2021 by Zeroguy

[4201]

1 hour ago, universe said:

Interesting how the "like inequality" appears to be the same as the "wealth inequality" meassured by the Gini coefficient.

It's not the same, it's worse

(source)

Edited April 29, 2021 by 4201

[Peter Miklis]

@4201 damn, that's brutal lol

[Emerald]

2 hours ago, 4201 said:

That's not how it works, it's not like "average" people match with "average" people and so on for any "quality" of profiles. Everyone has higher standards on Tinder because they are exposed to lots of profiles and so no one wants to choose the average one.

You can see it here: https://qz.com/1051462/these-statistics-show-why-its-so-hard-to-be-an-average-man-on-dating-apps/

Everyone targets the "top" people, if you have an average profile you stand no change. There is no such thing as an average looking person, just get a high quality camera, take a photo in which you are really happy (show your best self) and show some of your hobbies to prob get in the top 10% of profiles and have decent chances. I think for most people the difficulty is letting go of all the insecurities that are noticeable in your photos. But if you let go of all your insecurities you might as well just talk to people anywhere instead of on an app where everyone is objectified and rated.

But I’m a woman. So, uploading a photo of an average looking guy would be the control factor. If I did the experiment with the image of a male model, it wouldn’t be a fair experiment.

Perhaps on dating sites, it’s true that average looking men don’t fair as well as they would in life. So much of a man’s attractiveness ONLY comes through in person.

But I’m still confident that I could get 5 dates set up before the allotted time elapses. 

[Byun Sean]

This exercise can't give a completely accurate picture because

the pictures you would upload are not you but someone else meaning you would be portraying a fake persona. A big dynamic in dating is that 

you are genuinely interested/ attracted to the other person and you at the same time are putting yourself out there with the risk of rejection.

This experiment would dispel all of that.

 

The best way I've found to get an accurate picture of the other gender's perspective is to drop your own self bias/ ego and then look at it.

Basically more consciousness is needed.

 

Because in dating most guys and girls think the other gender has it way easier because they are biased toward their own survival needs which

clouds their ability to see.

 

Both men and women have struggles in dating. Different struggles that are not perfectly symmetrical, but both

have big struggles.

The dating market is not equal and is pure survival. Meaning it can be brutal and unfair at times. Yes, thats the nature of survival.

If you want unconditional love pursue God's love. 

Edited April 29, 2021 by Byun Sean

[Jacob Morres]

14 minutes ago, Byun Sean said:

Both men and women have struggles in dating. Different struggles that are not perfectly symmetrical, but both

have big struggles.

 

ya this. though i think men may have it harder overall. like everyone has struggles. you can say that people in 1st world countries have struggles and so do those in 3rd world countries. everyone has struggles. but there is definitely a clear difference  

that being said i am not versed well on all the struggles of women in the dating place.  

that also being said, as leo said, don't look at statistics for personal development work. the average person is not great at survival and shouldn't really be used as a data point as to what's possible. most people are just barely scraping by. it's not as hard as these statistics make it out to be. you can make great results in 1-2 years if you put in the work 

statistics are not holistic because they track and explain very little of the entire picture  

Edited April 29, 2021 by Jacob Morres

[Byun Sean]

2 hours ago, Jacob Morres said:

ya this. though i think men may have it harder overall. like everyone has struggles. you can say that people in 1st world countries have struggles and so do those in 3rd world countries. everyone has struggles. but there is definitely a clear difference  

This is exactly what i mean by self bias.

You consider your situation a 3rd world country because you don't see women's struggles.

 

Let me give you a list.

well consider. Having to be judged for your value purely based on your looks. If your not hot enough men will just

look past you. 

You also have to be social and have a circle of friends so you can meet new people and make new connections. Otherwise you

have like no chance of meeting a guy other than online dating which is full of creeper guys that don't actually care about you 

but just want to get into your pussy.

You also basically have to attract partners and wait for them to come to you because otherwise

you don't know if they are sexually and emotionally committed to you.

The ones that do come to you you have to make sure 

they have decent integrity and character so they won't pump and dump you leaving you emotionally scarred.

With this comes a whole number of shit tests you have to put guys through.

It's extremely rare to find a quality guy and when you do, it seems like every girl wants him and he has countless options.

 

So you have to make that guy somehow fall in love with you only and commit to you.

 

You as a man in a way have a huge advantage being the hunter because you can initiate to date whoever you want whenever you

want. It doesn't mean you can't get rejected but you have that 1st move advantage. 

On top of that you don't feel constant fear for your safety as a part of how you biologically operate like women do since your a guy.

The guy is also way less at risk when it comes to sex. The man is emotionally involved but the woman's survival is greatly at risk when it comes

to sex because it is dependent on whether they are left an emotionally scarred single mother vs you just not getting sex and connection.

 

Those are just a few.

 

Remember as a man your survival agenda is to spread your seed which makes sex the #1 goal in a partner.

For a woman, sex is important but it is secondary. Her #1 goal is finding 1 trustworthy strong man that can commit to her. This is because the man's character is more important and primary to

the survival of her and any potential child she may conceive of . 

This is why biologically after a woman has sex she gets emotionally attached to that guy.

 

 

Edited April 30, 2021 by Byun Sean

[Zeroguy]

3 hours ago, Byun Sean said:

This is exactly what i mean by self bias.

You consider your situation a 3rd world country because you don't see women's struggles.

 

Let me give you a list.

well consider. Having to be judged for your value purely based on your looks. If your not hot enough men will just

look past you. 

You also have to be social and have a circle of friends so you can meet new people and make new connections. Otherwise you

have like no chance of meeting a guy other than online dating which is full of creeper guys that don't actually care about you 

but just want to get into your pussy.

You also basically have to attract partners and wait for them to come to you because otherwise

you don't know if they are sexually and emotionally committed to you.

The ones that do come to you you have to make sure 

they have decent integrity and character so they won't pump and dump you leaving you emotionally scarred.

With this comes a whole number of shit tests you have to put guys through.

It's extremely rare to find a quality guy and when you do, it seems like every girl wants him and he has countless options.

 

So you have to make that guy somehow fall in love with you only and commit to you.

 

You as a man in a way have a huge advantage being the hunter because you can initiate to date whoever you want whenever you

want. It doesn't mean you can't get rejected but you have that 1st move advantage. 

On top of that you don't feel constant fear for your safety as a part of how you biologically operate like women do since your a guy.

The guy is also way less at risk when it comes to sex. The man is emotionally involved but the woman's survival is greatly at risk when it comes

to sex because it is dependent on whether they are left an emotionally scarred single mother vs you just not getting sex and connection.

 

Those are just a few.

 

Remember as a man your survival agenda is to spread your seed which makes sex the #1 goal in a partner.

For a woman, sex is important but it is secondary. Her #1 goal is finding 1 trustworthy strong man that can commit to her. This is because the man's character is more important and primary to

the survival of her and any potential child she may conceive of . 

This is why biologically after a woman has sex she gets emotionally attached to that guy.

 

 

10 hours ago, Emerald said:

 

Quote

 

 

Quote

 

Yeah boi. 

What I don't really like is when they their goals and agendas present as truth. 

They constantly try to convince us that we have to fall under that. 

Because it may sound more "concious". 

Both agendas can meet. But they are still agendas. 

[Zeroguy]

Also actually enlightened women is rare so being fished upon high concious is impossible in everyday life. So far I only met 2 women of that sort in my entie life and met countless regular(self agenda on 1st place) and rare wiser but still their self agenda is at 1st just with better propaganda behind it. 

@Emerald is not actually enlightened. She would under my categorization fall under those wiser ones. 

Edited April 30, 2021 by Zeroguy

[Zeroguy]

Want to actually get pussy guys 

Work and improve what females are looking for and you will swim in it. At full development women come as secondary thing. That's the paradox. 

If your mind is still obsessed with it, it means you are lacking development. 

This also makes you attractive to them. 

More pussy without much fuzz. 

Still like observing pulling the rope game. 

Also wouldn't complain to observe. Hahaha Hey I enjoy being naked in my home all the time. 

"whatever" just how much they lie. Hahahahahahahahaha 

Cute. 

 

Edited April 30, 2021 by Zeroguy

[Emerald]

3 hours ago, Zeroguy said:

Also actually enlightened women is rare so being fished upon high concious is impossible in everyday life. So far I only met 2 women of that sort in my entie life and met countless regular(self agenda on 1st place) and rare wiser but still their self agenda is at 1st just with better propaganda behind it. 

@Emerald is not actually enlightened. She would under my categorization fall under those wiser ones. 

The main goal of my interactions on this section of the forum is to give a more accurate picture of the female bias/agenda.

Too many misconceptions about how women actually feel and a misunderstanding of what women are really wanting in a man at the deepest level.

I’m a huge advocate of letting the deep feminine bias be known. Men’s stories about it may serve their agenda, but the stories are inaccurate and incomplete.

So, I want men to know the truth of what the female sexual bias/agenda actually is. But most men aren’t interested in the truth of our perspective. They’re interested only in what has worked for them. 

But truth and practicality are different things.

The stories that men superimpose upon female sexuality work similar to how nature myths worked... where the people in a given village/tribe would notice a natural phenomenon and place a story upon it to demystify and explain it. This helped them feel more in control of that natural phenomenon.

For example, a tribe may notice that it rains and not know why it rains. So, instead of having a clear understanding of the precipitation cycle, they have a simplified and self-centric story of ‘there’s a God in the clouds and he’s crying tears of joy as a gift to us to water our crops. So, we must give gifts to God in the form of sacrifice to get God to cry the tears of joy.”

This is what men do in relation to female sexuality, which is a force of nature that they don’t yet understand and thus feel out of control of. And the nature-myth men tell themselves is an understandable distortion. I can see why men believe what they believe. 

But it is functionally a nature myth about female sexuality. It may work as a functional understanding for your purposes and agenda. But it isn’t true. 

Just the same way that the ‘crying God’ myth used to understand the rain might be helpful to the tribes-people for their purposes and agenda and to feel more in control of their fate, but it isn’t true.

And I’m the person here with the scientific understanding of the precipitation cycle.

And I want you to understand the precipitation cycle because that’s what’s actually true. And knowing what’s true (instead of just what’s practical) will free you from enslavement to the image of the crying God.

You can still use the myth for practical purposes.... but it won’t consume and rule your life any longer. You won’t be at the mercy of a false idea once you realize the idea isn’t true. 

Now, the ‘crying God’ metaphor may be more useful to you than the truth behind the precipitation cycle in many situations. But it doesn’t make the ‘crying God’ metaphor an accurate reflection of what’s really going on.

And the female bias is toward intimacy. If men don’t understand us, we don’t get what we need. Period. 

So, understanding the precipitation cycle may not feel relevant to the tribes-people. But in order to go deeper, you must get a more accurate view of what’s happening.

Edited April 30, 2021 by Emerald

[Roy]

On 4/28/2021 at 5:03 PM, Lyubov said:

lol don't gas light me. just like how guys in their youth shows each other their dicks and compare dick sizes or comment on each other's junk during the shower after gym. it's a common thing most guys have done. asking to see your friend's (who is a girl) tinder counts as well.

It's not gaslighting. You actually just have a warped and flawed perspective on how to understand the other sex.

If you want to learn anything and develop you need to completely drop this score-keeping bullshit paradigm.

[Zeroguy]

@Emerald I like you not that I don't.

Wisdom is important in life.Always good to know smart people.Instead of war I would/should always go for constructive stuff .

So I apologize to you.

Just healing from that desire to "grab someone by the neck and push him/her against the wall".What can I do.

be smart boys /girls.With whom you are is important for quality of your own life.

Edited April 30, 2021 by Zeroguy

[Consept]

@Emerald Im sorry but as detached as you think youll be from the interactions, i just cant see you getting many replies. I think youre overestimating how your frame and not caring position would be successful, especially if you use an average guy for the picture, average being a rating of 5, if you get one swipe right ill be surprised. I think you should put this to the test though 

[Shin]

@Consept

If only she knew, she would open a center for nice guy reconversion  

Edited April 30, 2021 by Shin

[Jacob Morres]

@Emerald if you think you could just roll up and do great on dating apps (as an average guy) you're incredibly naive on the challenge it is for dudes on dating apps , sorry. you're in for a rude awakening

do apologize if i come off a bit much

Edited April 30, 2021 by Jacob Morres

[Emerald]

4 hours ago, Consept said:

@Emerald Im sorry but as detached as you think youll be from the interactions, i just cant see you getting many replies. I think youre overestimating how your frame and not caring position would be successful, especially if you use an average guy for the picture, average being a rating of 5, if you get one swipe right ill be surprised. I think you should put this to the test though 

 

3 hours ago, Jacob Morres said:

@Emerald if you think you could just roll up and do great on dating apps (as an average guy) you're incredibly naive on the challenge it is for dudes on dating apps , sorry. you're in for a rude awakening

do apologize if i come off a bit much

I’ve never even been a woman on dating apps, so maybe I don’t know the territory.

But I have a couple male friends (who are below average in attractiveness with not much game) who get dates on dating apps. 

I’ve also been the friend of a woman while she chats with guys on dating apps. And the guys were okay looking (like 6s) in my assessment.

My point is that I’m not apt to take it personally and will feel more comfortable taking risks than a guy who might have his ego on the line and who might feel the sting of rejection more acutely.