Having "weird hobbies"

[soos_mite_ah]

I catch myself judging myself for having weird hobbies that often involve self development and spirituality. I know these things aren't inherently weird but there is a part of me that feels weird because of the way spirituality is seen by nonspiritual people. 

I'm much more open on this forum and this place gives me a safe space/outlet to talk about things that I'm actually into and actually am working on. I wish I could be as authentic irl but in social interactions, I notice that I'm kind of afraid to say something that will make me look crazy. So as a result, I feel that I give off a rather closed off energy because I'm hesitant to talk about things that actually interest me. 

I guess I need to find a different social circle that shares my interests. But I don't know where to look irl and the fact that I'm stuck in the house doesn't help either. So until I figure out what I can do to change my circumstances, I'm thinking about trying to change my mindset and work through the shame I have around the stuff that I'm into. 

Thoughts? 

[Preety_India]

@soos_mite_ah what sort of weird hobbies? Examples? 

 

[soos_mite_ah]

Just now, Preety_India said:

@soos_mite_ah what sort of weird hobbies? Examples? 

 

I mean it's just things related to self development, spirituality, journaling, meditation etc. None of them are weird on this site but I know that if I talk about spirituality and meditation to the average person irl they'd probably think I'm insane. I normally try to mask these interests with my interest for the social sciences like psychology or sociology, or something like analyzing media and politics. Don't get me wrong, I'm also interested in that as well but there is a part of me that feels like I can't fully be authentic. 

I feel like this spongebob meme when I'm watering down my interests to not be labeled as crazy: 

[Preety_India]

@soos_mite_ah that's not weird. Those who think it's weird and give you reactions are simply unaware folks. 

 

[soos_mite_ah]

I'm afraid of looking like a walking Awaken With JP parody lmao 

 

[Lyubov]

Meh, if you enjoy stuff and it isn't toxic or harmful let it go. I have a few weird pass times that don't really bother me. Fun to do while listening to audio books or winding down after a long day. 

[aurum]

@soos_mite_ah

I've definitely been there. I think what you're experiencing is very normal.

We all have a desire to belong and feel a part of "the group". I don't think having a perspective that largely goes against our peers is inherently always necessary or "better" than having a perspective that fits in.

In fact, in a more ideal world, the things we talk about on this forum would be the norm. And we would just be one of many.

The problem is, what happens when the group is collectively walking off a cliff?

Do you just follow along, or do you actually declare that you're going to do something different?

That's how I see spirituality right now. It seems to me that the majority of people are walking off a cliff when it comes to their life. And spirituality feels like sanity.

The more I do this work, the less bothered I am about not necessarily fitting in. I know it's making me a happier, more fulfilled person.

[soos_mite_ah]

45 minutes ago, aurum said:

@soos_mite_ah

I've definitely been there. I think what you're experiencing is very normal.

We all have a desire to belong and feel a part of "the group". I don't think having a perspective that largely goes against our peers is inherently always necessary or "better" than having a perspective that fits in.

In fact, in a more ideal world, the things we talk about on this forum would be the norm. And we would just be one of many.

The problem is, what happens when the group is collectively walking off a cliff?

Do you just follow along, or do you actually declare that you're going to do something different?

That's how I see spirituality right now. It seems to me that the majority of people are walking off a cliff when it comes to their life. And spirituality feels like sanity.

The more I do this work, the less bothered I am about not necessarily fitting in. I know it's making me a happier, more fulfilled person.

Fair enough. I've had a lot of benefits from learning about spirituality and similar topics. I guess for me it's the fear of being seen as irrational or someone who just has their heads in the clouds. I think it's the stage orange social pressure to want to be seen as rational and logical. 

And my thing is that I do have critiques about new age spirituality. While I don't consider myself a new ager, I can see a lot of my views being interpreted as such. Which isn't a bad thing, new age spirituality has a lot of points. My critique is that a lot of new agers can lack decent stage orange integration and that's what causes them to look crazy and cringey. Without proper proper stage orange integration to stage green ideas, you get anti vaxxers who believe essential oils will protect you, companies like Goop, and people who think frutarianism or bretharianism are healthy and sustainable lifestyles just to name a few. I guess I just don't want to be associated with that group if that makes sense.  

I think that's one of the reasons why I got attracted to Leo's videos since 2018. They discussed spirituality but had a more integrative and systemic way of looking at it as opposed to "let's gather in a circle, talk about oneness, and start manifesting with crystals." Actualized.org to me seems a more holistic and integrative source that does a more solid analysis about existential topics. 

Edited April 16, 2021 by soos_mite_ah

[King Merk]

That spongebob pic cracked me up hahaha. Definitely been there. It’s a normal stage that you’re going through.

Eventually you’ll care more about your authentic self expression than you care about fitting in or being “normal”. 

Journal about what it means to be “weird” vs to be “cool/normal”.

Also, you might just be surprised how many other people are into “weird” shit once you speak openly & honestly about it