mmKay

Amsterdank Truffle Retreat?

12 posts in this topic

So I had an insight :

It's probably going to require like a year of tripping or more to heal and release all the trauma and blockages I carry just to be actually truly "functional". Actually I'm tempted to say a life-time of tripping since I don't really know, but lets hope not lol.

 

I like to keep it light on the forum and not wipe my digital tears on your LCD screens but here is some more serious talk :

 

I've been in this sort of limbo between Spirituallity and Personal development for more than I'd like to admit. It's coming close to 3 years now and I really feel how I'm subconsciously pulling on the handbrake the whole time. Basically,  I'm getting nowhere in both of these. My personal development fundations had never been solid , and then I went too deep too fast into spirituallity and I definately hurt myself ( pun not intended ) 

I 'm not able to pinpoint exactly what is holding me back but there certainly is a lot of something, and I have more than plenty of reasons, that I'm not getting into here,  to belive I'm carrying tons of trauma.

I've done heaps and lots and tons of journaling and other trauma release work and I've been really successfull at it . And yet there is more. The blue whale in the room.

Because right now I feel like " I belong nowhere" . No I'm not depressed or nihilistic. It's just how I really feel. Filled with resistance and disinterest  . Not really much interest in developing myself, not really interested in social life, not really interested in spirituallity, or Life Purpose / contribution, or making money. I don't really relate to my family. I tried to go back to my competition-driven videogame lifestyle but I can't even enjoy it anymore. I've seen behind the curtains of desire for status, recognition, being the top dog , etc. The magic is gone forever there.

I light up around other people, since I'm a really uplifting guy but I feel like it's actually just distraction. I could distract myself with a GF and more and more friends and travel and maybe starting a family like other people distract themselves with,  but those are just red herrings and I intuit it.

I want to start lvl 2 of life.

TLDR : I want to make a systemic,  structural move to be able to consistently trip and heal my hidden wounds.  I'll do more research since I'm pretty much clueless about what are some decent plausible decisions but what came to my mind are two things :

  • Learn how to grow mushrooms, since they are legal to grow / for personal use  here in Spain,  and munch on those, but I live with my parents and I have no interest in explaining or convincing them of much. Ofc I could just move or rent a place or smth.
  • Temporarely move to the Netherlands with the only purpose of pursuing personal healing, since I heard you can simply buy psilocybin truffless in physical shops there. The thing is IDK how effective they are for healing work.

I don't think some 3000€ Ibiza ayahuasca retreat would be the solution like I've seen around. Maybe there are some similar but better alternatives. 

Anyways. Legal sourcing surely is one heck of a bottleneck for human consciousness development and colective healing.

If you have some legal, posting-guideline friendly structural solutions  or suggestions that you think may suit me, or anyone in similar shoes,  feel free to share.


🗣️🗯️  personal dev Log Lyfe Journal 🗿🎭 ~ Raw , Emotional, Unfiltered

 

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@mmKay Good plan ?

 

12 hours ago, mmKay said:

I heard you can simply buy psilocybin truffless in physical shops there. The thing is IDK how effective they are for healing work.

As far as I know, truffles are very similiar to shrooms.

But if growing shrooms is legal in Spain, I would just rent a place in Spain. Rather than moving all the way to the Netherlands and rent a place there.

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@mmKay Why can't you do both?

Why can't you travel find friends & a girlfriend, whilst also tripping & healing?

Also why only limit your healing to psychedelics, how about kambo, therapy, NLP ...

I can't decide whats best for you, but for me personally nothing makes me more present than travelling & novelty & meeting people, I dread ever losing the desire for that stuff again. 

Maybe find a way to spark the desire for it again, I don't know. I just think that stuff is too good to evade. 

& Maybe stop trying to separate the two. Just see all spirituality as you enhancing your mood, energy, vibrations + reducing overthinking, rumination & creating your own meaning & drive. That enhances personal development. They go hand in hand.

Edited by Striving for more

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You could probably grow them in a tiny storage unit for $30/mo if it's legal in your area I don't see the problem.

That will be by far better than flying to expensive retreats. You can grow a lifetime supply of mushrooms and distill them all into a bottle of vodka. A lifetime of mushroom vodka ;)

Just don't let your parents or friends start doing shots :o

Just be careful that you are not caught and tried as a dealer. Usually if they catch you making drugs, they will try you as a dealer even if it was just for your personal use. They will just assume you will be selling them and that will stick in court. You do not want to get caught as a dealer or drug lab.


You are God. You are Truth. You are Love. You are Infinity.

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Why don't you find yourself a nice place on Airbnb for weekends and trip there ?

Is what I do, and works just fine ?

 

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16 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

 

That will be by far better than flying to expensive retreats. You can grow a lifetime supply of mushrooms and distill them all into a bottle of vodka. A lifetime of mushroom vodka ;)

 

Can you give us resources on how to distill mushroom that we can have for a life time 

 

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1 minute ago, Mysterious Stranger said:

Can you give us resources on how to distill mushroom that we can have for a life time

Google around. There are alcohol extraction teks all over the web.


You are God. You are Truth. You are Love. You are Infinity.

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3 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

Google around. There are alcohol extraction teks all over the web.

Yes, I'm doing alcohol extraction, but curious on how long is the expiration date, do you think it can last for years and still be good? 

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Why don't you just start doing acid? It is very sace to obtain and very gentle and clear.


I am the only thing stopping myself from receiving infinite Love form Myself. I am Infinite Love for god sake.

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truffles are great that is my first experience when I lived just outside amsterdam 


 "Unburdened and Becoming" - Bon Iver

                            ◭"89"

                  

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21 hours ago, Mysterious Stranger said:

Yes, I'm doing alcohol extraction, but curious on how long is the expiration date, do you think it can last for years and still be good? 

Alcohol extract should last for years. If frozen, maybe a lifetime.


You are God. You are Truth. You are Love. You are Infinity.

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