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Hardkill

Are female dating coaches pointless for men to follow?

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I have seen the material of most of male couches and some female coaches. I noticed that female coaches tend to make you more of a strong good guy while male dating coaches tend to make you more of a player (there are exceptions). If you are a begginner then you can learn from them because you do not know shit but i would avoid them unless you find 1 that REALLY REALLY resonates with you.

From a conscious point of view female dating coaches are better because they make you care about the female agenda and feelings while most of male dating advice (not all of it) tends to focus more on pure results and cares less about the colleteral damage it causes.

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11 hours ago, Hardkill said:

Okay, but here's what I don't get. As an example, there is this hot British dating coach in real life named Kezia Noble, who has been claimed the "world's leading female dating coach." I actually first learned about her and her team almost a decade ago and while much of her material is pretty similar to what even the most aggressive male dating coaches out there teach along with the fact that she's still highly successful, I know that Kezia is a heterosexual women. Therefore, I sincerely doubt that she herself has had any practice seducing other women. So, how did she learn how to become such a fantastic dating coach for men? I mean, what kind of practice do women like her need to do in order to be qualified enough to help men succeed with dating?

There's also fantastic high-performance coaches who never played professional basketball / run a fortune 500 company.

Judge them by the results their clients get.

 

There's also excellent players whose pickup advice limits itself to: "Just get loose and be yourself, bro"

Being able to do something ≠ being able to teach it to people

Edited by flowboy

Learn to resolve trauma. Together.

Testimonials thread: www.actualized.org/forum/topic/82672-experience-collection-childhood-aware-life-purpose-coaching/

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RSD had a female instructor called Sarah and she gave great advice but there was no credibility. 

It is like a rapist who cares about wearing a condom. Or a feminist who teaches men how to beat up wives. It doesn't make sense. 

I saw here in person doing her pitch after the free tour and it become obvious to me: she just does it for the money. I could just sense her intentions and it was nasty. 

You don't want to learn from somebody who just does it for the money. Females have no interests in understanding men although the other way that is not the case. That is the harsh truth about genders. 

Edited by StarStruck

In Tate we trust

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1 hour ago, StarStruck said:

Females have no interests in understanding men

Sounds like You are painting with a broad brush. I would be careful with these kind of absolute statements. They tend to backfire?

What if You meet a genuinely nice woman?

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1 hour ago, StarStruck said:

RSD had a female instructor called Sarah and she gave great advice but there was no credibility. 

It is like a rapist who cares about wearing a condom. Or a feminist who teaches men how to beat up wives. It doesn't make sense. 

I saw here in person doing her pitch after the free tour and it become obvious to me: she just does it for the money. I could just sense her intentions and it was nasty. 

You don't want to learn from somebody who just does it for the money. Females have no interests in understanding men although the other way that is not the case. That is the harsh truth about genders. 

I think women understand men, to a limited degree. Like, they know what type of guy they'd like to be with, generally. But, how a man is supposed to behave, that's for him to figure out.

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14 minutes ago, At awe said:

Sounds like You are painting with a broad brush. I would be careful with these kind of absolute statements. They tend to backfire?

What if You meet a genuinely nice woman?

Women will love you as long as you fulfill her needs. The moment you can't she just will drop you like a brick. Especially if she has other options and doesn't have kids, and thus is not settled.

Don't forget: females chose. I don't hate on women. They just want to have the best deal but men shouldn't be too naive.

Of couse I could find a women who would love me for who I am but these are the conditions:

1. I have to offer more value than her in terms of status, looks, and financial position

2. Nothing else matters

This is what I'm trying to say: women never trade down. So as I man shouldn't be so foolish to think I can get a great bargain just like females do.

10 minutes ago, Peter Miklis said:

I think women understand men, to a limited degree. Like, they know what type of guy they'd like to be with, generally. But, how a man is supposed to behave, that's for him to figure out.

Women "think" with their feelings. That is something I can't do. I wish I could tap into that.

Women don't make calculations when choosing to spread her legs for you after a first date. 

When picking a long term partner, women tend to use their cognition more and think about your status, personality and financial position and compare it to her other options.


In Tate we trust

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7 hours ago, flowboy said:

There's also fantastic high-performance coaches who never played professional basketball / run a fortune 500 company.

Judge them by the results their clients get.

 

There's also excellent players whose pickup advice limits itself to: "Just get loose and be yourself, bro"

Being able to do something ≠ being able to teach it to people

That's true. I actually was just thinking about that very same analogy you made. It's true that a lot of the best professional basketball coaches were never pro basketball players. However, after doing some research yesterday, practically every professional basketball coach is a former basketball player of some kind. In fact, I believe that most of them were at least college level basketball players. At the very least, every pro basketball coach were high school basketball players, except for a few of them.

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@At awe Being nice has nothing to do with understanding. Females treat the idea of having sex with a shitty personality but hot looks as something weak, immoral and wrong. Females are just as biased as guys are

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1 hour ago, StarStruck said:

Women "think" with their feelings. That is something I can't do. I wish I could tap into that.

All humans have irrational, emotional side to them, even men. Women just tend to lean into it much more. I tend to notice it all the time, even on this forum, when I look into some of the women's journals. It's that chaotic energy. Their thoughts seem all over the place. And yet, you can't say such type of thinking is useless. For example, having a passion is one of the most usefull things in life, if you can harness it and use it to fuel you. Rationality itself cannot be completely separated from emotions.

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@Peter Miklis Issue with girls is that they do shit based on their feelings and then say "i do it based on logic". It is hilarious tbh. When it comes to dating it is at their fullest. "I want a good guy": Logic talk. Goes for the fun good looking asshole: Emotional talk. Guess who wins.

The emotional side for sure.

Just be honest with yourself, no one is judging you if you do shit based on your feelings lol

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5 minutes ago, Karmadhi said:

Just be honest with yourself, no one is judging you if you do shit based on your feelings lol

Are you sure? If noone was judging them, why would they have to rationalize liking "nice guys" and hide their inclinations towards "bad boys"? I'm pretty sure there's an army of people ready to judge, so keep that in mind.

Besides, I'm not really fond of this dichotomy between "nice" and "bad", there's a plenty of grey area in between. It's better to be balanced human being than to fit into stereotype.

 

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1 hour ago, StarStruck said:

Women will love you as long as you fulfill her needs. The moment you can't she just will drop you like a brick. Especially if she has other options and doesn't have kids, and thus is not settled.

Don't forget: females chose. I don't hate on women. They just want to have the best deal but men shouldn't be too naive.

Of couse I could find a women who would love me for who I am but these are the conditions:

1. I have to offer more value than her in terms of status, looks, and financial position

2. Nothing else matters

This is what I'm trying to say: women never trade down. So as I man shouldn't be so foolish to think I can get a great bargain just like females do.

Do You think that applies to a tier 2 woman? Could You imagine that there are exceptions to Your understanding? Can You accept that since You have met only a fraction of women, it’s not possible to make Your statements? Can Your personal truth be an assumption ? Is it possible that You have met only the type of women that led You to this conclusion?

My experience is different from Yours...

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@Karmadhi Don’t put all women into the same pot. Try to imagine what kind of consequences that might have on Your “future”... Can You trust Your partner if subconsciously there’s a suspicion that no matter how “good”she is , she might screw You over? I’m writing from my own experience. Can You trust life?

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49 minutes ago, Peter Miklis said:

All humans have irrational, emotional side to them, even men. Women just tend to lean into it much more. I tend to notice it all the time, even on this forum, when I look into some of the women's journals. It's that chaotic energy. Their thoughts seem all over the place. And yet, you can't say such type of thinking is useless. For example, having a passion is one of the most usefull things in life, if you can harness it and use it to fuel you. Rationality itself cannot be completely separated from emotions.

Good observation about women. You are right that we have to harness both male and female energies but we also have to stay true to ourselves. If I for example harness too much female energy I wouldn't be me any more. 


In Tate we trust

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34 minutes ago, At awe said:

Do You think that applies to a tier 2 woman? Could You imagine that there are exceptions to Your understanding? Can You accept that since You have met only a fraction of women, it’s not possible to make Your statements? Can Your personal truth be an assumption ? Is it possible that You have met only the type of women that led You to this conclusion?

My experience is different from Yours...

Tier 2 women? Those are really rare. I believe most tier 2 people are men. If you are hot why should you develop yourself? I mean I do get women. I'm not hating. Also I'm just sharing my experiences. Tier 2 people are rare in my opinion. Where do you find them?


In Tate we trust

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@StarStruck People used to think for the longest time that swans are white, then they found some black ones in Australia. I love these kind of stories. Can never assume..

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@At awe I'd like to know who exactly is this "tier 2 women", or just tier 2 person in general. Does that mean that the person stays with you no matter what?

Wouldn't that mean less polarity between man and a woman, thus less sexual charge? Carefull what you wish for, cuz you might actually get it.

Maybe it's a sign of love to let other person leave once you don't serve their fundamental needs. That goes for both men and women.

 

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52 minutes ago, StarStruck said:

Tier 2 women? Those are really rare. I believe most tier 2 people are men. If you are hot why should you develop yourself? I mean I do get women. I'm not hating. Also I'm just sharing my experiences. Tier 2 people are rare in my opinion. Where do you find them?

lol yikes dude


It's Love.

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30 minutes ago, Peter Miklis said:

 

@At awe I'd like to know who exactly is this "tier 2 women", or just tier 2 person in general. Does that mean that the person stays with you no matter what?

 

Or she stays with you for other reasons than tier one would? Or a mix of those two? What are tier two values? Maybe tier two is so independent that she doesn’t go after a guy because of his funds/status etc?

 

30 minutes ago, Peter Miklis said:

Wouldn't that mean less polarity between man and a woman, thus less sexual charge? Carefull what you wish for, cuz you might actually get it.

Maybe I’ve been there..

 

30 minutes ago, Peter Miklis said:

Maybe it's a sign of love to let other person leave once you don't serve their fundamental needs. That goes for both men and women.

Agreed. But is it wise to “lean on” the other person?

Edited by At awe

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@Peter Miklis

1 hour ago, Peter Miklis said:

Are you sure? If noone was judging them, why would they have to rationalize liking "nice guys" and hide their inclinations towards "bad boys"?

For the same reason you try to tell yourself you like salad when actually you crave pizza.  Because salad is healthy for you. Good guys are healthy for the girl at the expense of being less "exciting" just like salad is healthier for you but less exciting than pizza is. You crave excitement and not healthy and you know that so you try to rationalize it away. A better response would be: I know i am attracted to something that is bad for me but it is what it is. No one is blaming people for liking what they like, you cannot control what you like. Just be honest about it.

By good guy i mean a self actualized conscious kind person not a nice guy with a hidden selfish agenda.

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