intotheblack

Teal swan - what a woman needs from a man in a relationship

658 posts in this topic

9 minutes ago, Parththakkar12 said:

Yes it is. And here we are, bumping it for no good reason.

Yeah I guess. 

I love what Rap said. 

Is anyone here actually in relationship. 

Good guy nailed it down completelly. 

So what's the status of Teal Swan lol. 

Is she in long term loving relationship herself? 

Edited by zeroISinfinity

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
11 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

It is true that we can and should pursue higher stuff. Game B. But we also have to recognize that we are deeply stuck in Game A right now, and that is not easy to ignore. Most guys are barely able to survive playing Game A such that Game B is like talking calculus to a mule.

And here's the thing: most women are playing Game A too. Very few women are playing Game B. So few that it is not a viable dating strategy to tailor your game to Game B women.

The ladies on this forum are advocating for Game B dating and relationships. That's great. But that can only happen in rare cases. Most men here are concered with getting laid, and for that purpose Game A is most effective. So we have here not only a male vs female bias issue, we have a Game A vs Game B issue.

How do you tailor your game for guys not interested in game A? To be frank, I have a much bigger desire for a relationship than game A. 

Game A to me seems like too much effort.. like it's not high enough as a value for me 

How would you go about this? Do you recommend going game A if your only intention is game B? 

Edited by Jacob Morres

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
51 minutes ago, Farnaby said:

@Emerald hmm, do you really believe that deep down we're only attracted to physical attributes? Maybe I'm repressing my masculine side or I have a stronger "feminine" side than the average man, but I wouldn't be satisfied only with big tits. 

I think most men are also seeking intimacy, love, connection. We're just less in touch with those aspects or talk less openly about them because society has taught us that those are "girly" things. 

Having read a lot of your posts, I'm pretty sure we actually agree on that part: we both have similar needs and long for similar things, it just manifests differently and maybe in a different order when first meeting a person (i.e us being more focused on "hotness" and women more on personality traits and so on).

But I also think that women have been conditioned to put on a façade that says "hotness isn't important to me, I mostly value intimacy and personality". I'm not a woman so I can't speak for you, but I've noticed these incongruencies between what women say and how they act. Of course, we do this too, it's part of the game and ideally I would like everyone to be more honest so we can stop hiding our truth. 

That's not what I'm saying. Men are attracted to deeper things as well. If that weren't the case, society would have fallen apart long ago. And of course, no one can have a relationships based on attraction alone.

This was more of an echo of what Leo was talking about in relation to male/female biases toward attraction and relationship respectively, and how he said that men preferring big tits is equivalent to women preferring masculine containment... which as I said before, is a false equivalency. 

But yes, men need relationship and intimacy too. We're a social species. So, a man who only seeks physical attraction will live a pretty lonely life where his social needs aren't met. 

But yes, women value male physical attractiveness too. I tend to become attracted to men who are a relative match to me, looks-wise. 

And we're ultimately making the same point... relationships aren't a battle of the sexes where men and women's needs can't be met at the same time. The needs are complementary and go together.

But the way that many men on this thread are putting it is that so their biases towards wanting an attractive partner will be served but not the part of themselves that actually wants/need intimacy... and that certainly won't be satisfying from the woman's perspective.

There's just a lot of not wanting to see this because ignoring the feminine perspective makes some men feel more comfortable and less vulnerable.


If you’re interested in developing Emotional Mastery and feeling more comfortable in your own skin, click the link below to register for my FREE Emotional Mastery Webinar…

Emotionalmastery.org

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
11 hours ago, Preety_India said:

If I said that I only want to date men of particular body features it's like objectification because I'm not talking about emotional aspects at all. 

I mean, you're allowed to be attracted to a huge and throbbing phallus, nobody will judge you for it.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I don´t see it as a gender war. We are just teasing each other, aren´t we? 

Besides that italian guy at the picture is sooo hot :)  I wonder if he could be a shell? ?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
3 minutes ago, Hulia said:

I don´t see it as a gender war. We are just teasing each other, aren´t we? 

Besides that italian guy at the picture is sooo hot :)  I wonder if he could be a shell? ?

Yeah, teasing each other... on a 470 posts long thread?

We should be calling it quits by now. I think we all are just horny bastards deep inside, that's why we keep talking about attraction?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
8 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

I have sex very rarely. I invest most of my energy into my work, my contemplations, and my awakenings. So be careful what you assume. Few men in my position have sacrificed as much sex as I have for a higher cause.

You have multiple girlfriends but you manage to have sex very rarely ? Please let me know how you manage that ! :D

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@Peter Miklis wrong tag sorry. 

@Hulia Khm khm well I am hotter then the guy on photo. 

But we are healing from all that so.... keep dreaming! 

Haha

Edited by zeroISinfinity

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
13 minutes ago, Hulia said:

I don´t see it as a gender war. We are just teasing each other, aren´t we? 

Besides that italian guy at the picture is sooo hot :)  I wonder if he could be a shell? ?

Which Italian guy? My ex was Italian. Show me which guy. 

 


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

Cleared out ignore list today. 

..

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
8 minutes ago, knakoo said:

You have multiple girlfriends but you manage to have sex very rarely ? Please let me know how you manage that ! :D

Astral. 

 

@Preety_India

2017-07-suncanje-muskarac-leto-thinkstock.jpg

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 minute ago, Preety_India said:

@zeroISinfinity hmm. I can't see his eyes. So no attraction. 

 

Oh c'mon. Whatever. 

Still didn't got answer about Teal. 

Credibility? 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 minute ago, Preety_India said:

@zeroISinfinity hmm. I can't see his eyes. So no attraction. 

 

What is there to see??? They are black!! And he has a beautiful smile

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
28 minutes ago, Emerald said:

This was more of an echo of what Leo was talking about in relation to male/female biases toward attraction and relationship respectively, and how he said that men preferring big tits is equivalent to women preferring masculine containment... which as I said before, is a false equivalency. 

From a self-actualisation viewpoint pursuing intimacy and connection in a relationship is certainly more noble than pursing someone based on how they look. However desiring intimacy and desiring physical looks are both selfish endeavours. Why would anyone even desire connection and intimacy in a committed relationship? Isn't it to just be satisfied at the end of the day? Leo is spot on when he says that one would probably not pursue a relationship if one was completely happy within oneself. 

So even though valuing how someone looks is shallow, from a higher perspective wanting intimacy in a relationship could also be seen as ''shallow'' because it is fundamentally still selfish.

I've always been someone who has sought love in other people my whole life. And after failing to seek the relationship I dreamed of with a women, looking back I can see even the most lovely, caring, conscious women I have met in my life are fundamentally selfish. Even though they may have empathy for my low-self esteem, even those nice women don't want to build an intimate connection with me -- Why would they? My self issues and depression is not something attractive to anyone. So even the most conscious of women I have met have their own bias. The bottom line is that it is a game of ego-survival -- not noble pursuit. We can talk about conscious relationships but isn't that more survival? Find completeness within yourself.

Enter spirituality.

All love is only for oneself. So turn towards that Self.

Edited by Samuel Garcia

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
11 minutes ago, Hulia said:

What is there to see??? They are black!! And he has a beautiful smile

I beleive guy on photo is a serb not italian but ok. Maybe my mistake it's from some serbian site. 

Could be any nationality anyway. (yeah yeah don't play smart, he is not from south east asia, subsaharan africa but might be from south africa and so on, we get it) 

Edited by zeroISinfinity

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 minute ago, zeroISinfinity said:

I beleive guy on photo is a serb not italian but ok. Maybe my mistake it's from some serbian site. 

Could be any nationality anyway. (yeah yeah don't play smart, he is not from south east asia, subsaharan africa but might be from south africa and so on, we get it) 

No problem. I just always called the guys looking like this one an "Italian" in my mind, for simplification. I liked this type. But never got it. My boy-friends on average were rather scandinavian types. Blond, blue eyes... 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
20 minutes ago, Hulia said:

What is there to see??? They are black!! And he has a beautiful smile

Eyes are the windows to the soul. They make a person come alive. They carry the expression of the heart. 

 


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

Cleared out ignore list today. 

..

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@Hulia Blonde slavic type and nordic are the same. Whole europe is mixed. Rus origin for example Nordic people mixed with slavs.

Proto german - balts - slavs. Same root. 

Slavs slavicized almost every group of people they came in contact with lol. 

European migrations and history. Wars wars wars. 

Edited by zeroISinfinity

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest
This topic is now closed to further replies.