Chumbimba

1 Girl per day

48 posts in this topic

@Emerald That's the best answer I've read on this post, aside from grow a pair and interact with even more women. Very insightful.

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James Marshall from TNL said:

"In terms of your evolution as a man and with women, talking to a couple of girls every single day, in the day time, and critically analyzing each set for the lessons, is far more effective than smashing through 20 approaches in one night. It fits in with your life. Talk to at least a girl a day. Make it your mission to see that girl on your way to work or walking down the street and go over and say hello."

"After 20 years of chasing women, do you you want to know what I've realised? Picking up women is easy, very fucking easy...technically. It's the inner world that lies the real challenge. List your narratives and limiting beliefs and get to work on them."

"Nothing did more for my core confidence than learning this art of being able to approach and meet women, as they are, in normal, everyday situations."

Jon from TNL said:

"I walk along the street. I see a beautiful women. I make eye contact, she makes eye contact back. I smile, she smiles back. I say 'hello', she says 'hello' back. I say 'what's your name?'. That is not an approach, that is the universe sorting itself out."

 

Edited by Spence94

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39 minutes ago, Spence94 said:

James Marshall from TNL said:

"In terms of your evolution as a man and with women, talking to a couple of girls every single day, in the day time, and critically analyzing each set for the lessons, is far more effective than smashing through 20 approaches in one night. It fits in with your life. Talk to at least a girl a day. Make it your mission to see that girl on your way to work or walking down the street and go over and say hello."

"After 20 years of chasing women, do you you want to know what I've realised? Picking up women is easy, very fucking easy...technically. It's the inner world that lies the real challenge. List your narratives and limiting beliefs and get to work on them."

"Nothing did more for my core confidence than learning this art of being able to approach and meet women, as they are, in normal, everyday situations."

Jon from TNL said:

"I walk along the street. I see a beautiful women. I make eye contact, she makes eye contact back. I smile, she smiles back. I say 'hello', she says 'hello' back. I say 'what's your name?'. That is not an approach, that is the universe sorting itself out."

 

So basically let your intuition do the work. Only consciousness work that is needed is to stay mindful of inner blocks and remove them. That is where the real work lies. 


In Tate we trust

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1 hour ago, Spence94 said:

James Marshall from TNL said:

"In terms of your evolution as a man and with women, talking to a couple of girls every single day, in the day time, and critically analyzing each set for the lessons, is far more effective than smashing through 20 approaches in one night. It fits in with your life. Talk to at least a girl a day. Make it your mission to see that girl on your way to work or walking down the street and go over and say hello."

"After 20 years of chasing women, do you you want to know what I've realised? Picking up women is easy, very fucking easy...technically. It's the inner world that lies the real challenge. List your narratives and limiting beliefs and get to work on them."

"Nothing did more for my core confidence than learning this art of being able to approach and meet women, as they are, in normal, everyday situations."

Jon from TNL said:

"I walk along the street. I see a beautiful women. I make eye contact, she makes eye contact back. I smile, she smiles back. I say 'hello', she says 'hello' back. I say 'what's your name?'. That is not an approach, that is the universe sorting itself out."

 

I like this approach. I personally am not a fan of spending a bunch of time going out and doing “day game.” Something far too forced and try hard about it. I think working in a few approaches a day when your out and about can be good if you don’t get overly attached to results and flow with what’s happening. It’s largely an inner work process.

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16 hours ago, Chumbimba said:

If I approach 1 girl per day. That will be 30 girls in a month. That's 365 girls in one year, that's 720 girls in 2 years. My objective is not to sleep with them. My objective is to just get more confident in interacting with them. 

Sounds like a simple enough plan, and I believe it would help, but something doesn’t feel quite right, which is why you made the thread, and you want to know & understand what that something is, yes? 

Love the new pic btw, lookin great man. 


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Wouldn't recommend approaching one girl a day if your a beginner cause you'll be fucking up a lot sets and its just going to demotivate you from continuing. I like your idea of approaching just to approach instead of getting sex because it does take a lot of pressure off of you to preform.

Plan to approach 5-10 girls back to back 3x times a week. Volume Volume Volume, don't worry about analyzing your sets thoroughly  until you make at least 100 approaches. You need to let you mind calibrate naturally in the beginning instead of trying to analyze everything, if you make a goal to approach 100 girls by a certain date your mind will naturally start to auto-correct mistakes you make and then you can go from there.

If your worried about developing a "bad rep" go to another town or area from your home base. When I was in uni I would go to another campus to practice, knocking out 15-20 approaches 3x times a week and was never seen as that "pick-up dude." Just don't be creepy and keep your approaches short and you should be good.

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9 hours ago, Armand said:

@Emerald That's the best answer I've read on this post, aside from grow a pair and interact with even more women. Very insightful.

Thank you! :)

 


If you’re interested in developing Emotional Mastery and feeling more comfortable in your own skin, click the link below to register for my FREE Emotional Mastery Webinar…

Emotionalmastery.org

 

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10 hours ago, Spence94 said:

James Marshall from TNL said:

"In terms of your evolution as a man and with women, talking to a couple of girls every single day, in the day time, and critically analyzing each set for the lessons, is far more effective than smashing through 20 approaches in one night. It fits in with your life. Talk to at least a girl a day. Make it your mission to see that girl on your way to work or walking down the street and go over and say hello."

"After 20 years of chasing women, do you you want to know what I've realised? Picking up women is easy, very fucking easy...technically. It's the inner world that lies the real challenge. List your narratives and limiting beliefs and get to work on them."

"Nothing did more for my core confidence than learning this art of being able to approach and meet women, as they are, in normal, everyday situations."

Jon from TNL said:

"I walk along the street. I see a beautiful women. I make eye contact, she makes eye contact back. I smile, she smiles back. I say 'hello', she says 'hello' back. I say 'what's your name?'. That is not an approach, that is the universe sorting itself out."

 

If you live in NYC that can work. That does not work in most places.

The biggest problem is the lack of hot women during the day on the streets. You need very special streets for effective day game.


You are God. You are Truth. You are Love. You are Infinity.

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The bottom line is that you just need to take consistent action, that's it. 30 girls at a weekend or 1-2 girls at a day, who cares? Do what makes the most sense given your life circumstances and logistics that you have

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11 hours ago, Spence94 said:

"I walk along the street. I see a beautiful women. I make eye contact, she makes eye contact back. I smile, she smiles back. I say 'hello', she says 'hello' back. I say 'what's your name?'. That is not an approach, that is the universe sorting itself out."

^^ Pretty much, yeah.

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@Leo Gura As a beginner you can also talk to normal girls. Hot girls are intimidating as fuck at first so you can practice talking to normal girls which the streets are good for. Drop your ego while practicing and learning. You can even date and fuck normal looking girls if you are a noob. 

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1 girl per day is stupid, especially if there is not an intent to at least close. Then, you're just approaching with no goal. It's like doing sales but with the intent to interact with the customer, instead of closing the sale. This is why these modern dating coaches are absolute garbage, because they push for no-results and a "mass approach" strategy. Save up some money and get a dating coach. No point in doing it alone and stupid. 

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@Chumbimba Your confidence comes from getting to your raw fucking essence. Not women. Most women are clowns. You should be discriminating not trying to “become more confident”, that’s a suckers game. Find realness. Most of them are scared and vulnerable with heavy amounts of brainwashing, and you’re trying to become more confident with them? Look I get it, but you’re meant to be protecting them, you’ll see that, your confidence that they want to see as well comes from you knowing your deepest fucking essence on a raw visceral level and if she doesn’t know hers, being vulnerable enough throughout the process to help her find hers. There’s a deep primordial subconscious that lurks inside your mind, how the hell are you going to own that shit by “talking to one woman a day to become more confident”, honestly I feel like I’m watching a kids Monday morning of show and tell at school, no, your force thunders inward to outward to the world as a consequence of you unearthing the deepest layers of your being into the highest dominance you can give this fucking planets extension. One day you’ll see this, but then maybe not. This is deep fucking wisdom that you gotta contemplate in the quietest, deepest and most intelligent parts of your being. WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU BROTHER? 

Edited by Origins

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42 minutes ago, Origins said:

@Chumbimba Your confidence comes from getting to your raw fucking essence. Not women. Most women are clowns. You should be discriminating not trying to “become more confident”, that’s a suckers game. Find realness. Most of them are scared and vulnerable with heavy amounts of brainwashing, and you’re trying to become more confident? Look I get it, but you’re meant to be protecting them, you’ll see that, your confidence that they want to see as well comes from you fucking knowing your deepest fucking essence on a raw visceral level and if she doesn’t know hers, beyond vulnerable enough throughout the process to help her find hers. There’s a deep primordial subconscious that lurks inside your mind, how the hell are you going to own that shit by “talking to one woman a day”, honestly I feel like I’m watching a kids Monday morning of show and tell, no, your force thunders inward to outward to the world as a consequence of you unearthing the deepest layers of your being into the highest dominance you can give this fucking planet. One day you’ll see this, but then maybe not. This is deep fucking wisdom that you gotta contemplate in the quietest, deepest and most intelligent parts of your being. WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU BROTHER? 

Yeah. This is it.

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3 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

If you live in NYC that can work. That does not work in most places.

The biggest problem is the lack of hot women during the day on the streets. You need very special streets for effective day game.

I agree with your point. Abundance of opportunities allows this strategy to work day to day. This shouldn't stop guys integrating those opportunities that come up in their daily lives though.

Jon from TNL: "I do not encourage you to have a search and destroy attitude. See yourself as a social octopus, reaching out and offering energy to people."

What I like about The Natural Lifestyles is they're genuinely talking about self actualization and personal transformation  with dating as just a part of it, no different than what this forum is doing. Of course they teach tips, techniques and attitudes to seduce women, but if you listen to their podcast, it's mostly about inner transformation and being a well rounded spiritual self actualized modern man and using man's desire for women as a leverage into this. Of all the resources available on dating, they're the most high conciousness, well rounded and real out there in my opinion. 

Edited by Spence94

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On 3/3/2021 at 5:37 PM, Chumbimba said:

If I approach 1 girl per day. That will be 30 girls in a month. That's 365 girls in one year, that's 720 girls in 2 years. My objective is not to sleep with them. My objective is to just get more confident in interacting with them. 

 

I'd also like to add one thing: try not to mechanize the whole process too much. If you come across a chick who you find attractive, just approach her! I'm also relatively new to pick up (dated before, but never picked anyone up)  as well, and one thing I found helpful on this journey is when approach a really hot woman, or just any woman you personally find attractive, try not to put her on a pedestal. She's not some special creature, or the queen of england....she is very much a human with imperfections just like me and you. Don't feel bad that you are attracted to a particular woman, even in public. When talking to her, give her the subtle social cues that you are interested in her, and see where things go from there. If she plays along, and some tension is created between the two of you, let that tension determine where you go.  If it gets awkward, or if there are awkward moments between you two, just push through....allow the awkwardness! And since your objective is not to sleep with them, you will not come off as needy...which is great! 

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On 4.3.2021 at 1:47 AM, Chumbimba said:

@Leo Gura I have a belief that it is creepy to approach more than one girl at once in the same setting and that people will look down on me or see me as a creep. Thats why in college I didn't approach at all. I get the girls who come to me and they all tend to be shit. 

If you approach many girls in the same setting and they get the creeps out of you, this is a sign you are doing it wrong.

Imagine a way to approach many girls in a way that wouldn't be creepy. That right there is the way.


Everyone is waiting for eternity but the Shaman asks: "how about today?"

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12 hours ago, Karmadhi said:

As a beginner you can also talk to normal girls.

Even that is not so easy to find in most places during the day.

You are going to waste more time looking for the girl than talking to her. It is much more efficient to just to the mall for 3 hours on the weekend and do all your approaches back to back. You will also build up a nice momentum that way.

You have to be pretty skilled to just cold-open a random girl you see walking past you as you're going about your day. Most guys will never muster the balls to seize that opportunity. They will just talk themselves out of it. It takes a lot of approaching to get confident enough to the point where you can seize such a spontaneous occurrence. It will take you 30 minutes just to psych yourself up do it unless you are experienced.

It's much easier to talk about approaching than actually doing it.


You are God. You are Truth. You are Love. You are Infinity.

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On 04/03/2021 at 0:47 AM, Chumbimba said:

@Leo Gura I have a belief that it is creepy to approach more than one girl at once in the same setting and that people will look down on me or see me as a creep. Thats why in college I didn't approach at all. I get the girls who come to me and they all tend to be shit. 

If you go on a walk and approach girls in the street you will not have that problem. You are moving around and there is always a flow of new people, so nobody will notice what you are doing. Even in a mall it is similar.

The one approach a day can be a good strategy to begin with if you are in a densely populated area, to make it a habit. A good rule is to approach the first normal/cute girl that you see in the day, so you don't procrastinate. Maybe the first cute girl by herself and not on the phone if you prefer. It is essential to not break that rule ! 

Then after a few weeks maybe start doing 2 approaches a day, then 3 approaches. Or keep doing at least one a day but incorporate sessions when you do 5-10 approaches at least once a week. At the beginning getting "in the zone" and momentum is key. That will not happen if you only do one approach a day. 

You can also try the comfort zone crusher to start caring less about what other people think of you ! :)

ps : talking about the "shitty girls" is not the best attitude ;) 

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