Preety_India

Is a 36 year old guy with a 19 year girl appropriate?

58 posts in this topic

I'm asking this for a friend. 

Her sister is 19. The guy met her sister online and he is 36.

My friend asked me for advice. 

I don't think it's appropriate for a 36 year old guy to be dating a 19 year old.. 

It's a lot of age difference and I sense creepy vibes. 

The guy is divorced with 1 son and his ex  wife who divorced him never allows him to see his son. 

I don't feel good about this relationship. 

So asking here. 

What do you think? 

Additional information - 

I saw this guy's Social media post and the 19 year old girl commented something like - " I'm happy for you Daddy". 

Is it okay for her to call her 36 year old boyfriend "Daddy" publicly online. 

I don't know what to make of this. 

Is she simply playing or is this something to be taken more than lightly? 

 

Edited by Preety_India

INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

Cleared out ignore list today. 

..

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@Preety_India It’s impossible for someone, who knows even less about the QUALITY of their relationship than You, to evaluate this...

 

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@At awe refresh the page and read additional information. 


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

Cleared out ignore list today. 

..

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5 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

@At awe refresh the page and read additional information. 

Ok, I did. You basically answer it with Your question. We don’t know. Can be joking , can be daddy issues, who knows ?

What is Ok/normal? To whom? etc?

Edited by At awe

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it’s probably just a case of the 36 year old being too emotionally immature to connect with someone his age so by going out with someone much younger he gets to avoid his issues 


 

 

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If it wasn't inappropriate then why do we see such reactions on social media regarding celebrities. 

 

4zh3zu.jpg

 

 


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

Cleared out ignore list today. 

..

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Appropriate is relative. 

So... Yes and no. 


"life is not a problem to be solved ..its a mystery to be lived "

-Osho

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Big BIG red flag. 

36 year old guy will just exploit her lack of experience for sex and emotional manipulation.

 

It's not an even relationship in terms of power and experience even if the guy has good intentions for her.

 

1 hour ago, Preety_India said:

I don't feel good about this relationship. 

your intuition is right. If this was you I would say GTFO of that situation asap.

 

Usually age difference doesn't matter that much other than social reasons but 19 is basically like a child. They have so little experience and so much

room to get hurt and used.

 

Now even if you tell your friend this they may not agree with you and still want to do their own thing anyways.

 

I do not know them both personally so here you have to make your own judgement but just

the difference in experience and power in the relationship really bothers me here. 

 

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People use to commonly gossip like this when they saw a mixed race couple.   Gossip brings out the ugliness in people.  It's better to mind one's own business and be happy that someone else is happy rather than trying to undermine them.


Vincit omnia Veritas.

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It's not the age difference that matters so much as the fact that they met online. 

If they had met in person, then she'd get an instinctual feel for the guy-- if there's something off about him, it'd be detectable. 

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This happens alot, we all heard of this before, how does it usually play out? 


How is this post just me acting out my ego in the usual ways? Is this post just me venting and justifying my selfishness? Are the things you are posting in alignment with principles of higher consciousness and higher stages of ego development? Are you acting in a mature or immature way? Are you being selfish or selfless in your communication? Are you acting like a monkey or like a God-like being?

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haha i dont know

This seems like a good place to start https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=young+dating+older+man

My fathers second marriage was with someone 30 years younger then him, just a standard relationship. 

Seems to be a stage blue trend for the younger girl, they value the stable responsible family man that can provide.


How is this post just me acting out my ego in the usual ways? Is this post just me venting and justifying my selfishness? Are the things you are posting in alignment with principles of higher consciousness and higher stages of ego development? Are you acting in a mature or immature way? Are you being selfish or selfless in your communication? Are you acting like a monkey or like a God-like being?

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I've always thought the "half plus 7" formula is a good guideline for minimum dating age.

The reverse, for max dating age is "minus 7 times 2", so your 19 year old friend might want to be looking more for a 24 year old as the upper limit.

By this guideline, a 36 year old should be dating 25+


How to get to infinity? Divide by zero.

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6 hours ago, Hello from Russia said:

Damn, I always knew you are young!

 

6 hours ago, Preety_India said:

I'm asking this for a friend.

OFC

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1 hour ago, Arcangelo said:

 

OFC

Haha, of course!

I personally think it's fine. To each his own, honestly. I'd just live and let others live

Edited by Hello from Russia

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