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Striving for more

My Pick Up journal

38 posts in this topic

33 minutes ago, Striving for more said:

Or are you trying to say that all that matters is looks? 

Yes, the first test will be on your face. If you fail that one, it’s over. No matter what you do after that, the result will be the same.

If however you pass, then the next question is, is she available. If she has a boyfriend, then a loyal girl will dismiss you.

If she doesn’t have a boyfriend, then all you have to do is not act feminine and weak. Come up to her, have a short conversation for 5-10 mins max, then immediately set the date or take her number.
 

There is no need to try and impress her in the conversation. In fact, that is a weak behaviour and it will turn her off. 
 

The only objective of the conversation is to see if she is interested in you. As soon as you see the signs: smiling, good eye contact and talking a lot, it’s over. Set the date! There is nothing you have to do to win her over!


"Not believing your own thoughts, you’re free from the primal desire: the thought that reality should be different than it is. You realise the wordless, the unthinkable. You understand that any mystery is only what you yourself have created. In fact, there’s no mystery. Everything is as clear as day. It’s simple, because there really isn’t anything. There’s only the story appearing now. And not even that.” — Byron Katie

 

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1 hour ago, oMarcos said:

One day I wrote my phone number on a paper to a girl seated on a bus, while I was leaving for my stop.

Very weak behaviour. If you got away with that, it only means the girl was very attracted to you from the start. If it was any other girl, you would’ve been disqualified.

If you want her number, be direct and ask for it. 


"Not believing your own thoughts, you’re free from the primal desire: the thought that reality should be different than it is. You realise the wordless, the unthinkable. You understand that any mystery is only what you yourself have created. In fact, there’s no mystery. Everything is as clear as day. It’s simple, because there really isn’t anything. There’s only the story appearing now. And not even that.” — Byron Katie

 

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@How to be wise Hey man, where have your learned those stories and shitty assumptions you're now giving as advice?

If it's from personal experience, I'm telling you, you ain't got enough of it.

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@How to be wise

Dude I was a teenager... and All of this matter is not always black and white, people are different, but you know that.

Edited by oMarcos

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@Sleyker I’ve slept with more girls than you will in your lifetime.

Weak behaviour = weak results.

2 hours ago, oMarcos said:

people are different

Yes but weak behaviour is always the same.


"Not believing your own thoughts, you’re free from the primal desire: the thought that reality should be different than it is. You realise the wordless, the unthinkable. You understand that any mystery is only what you yourself have created. In fact, there’s no mystery. Everything is as clear as day. It’s simple, because there really isn’t anything. There’s only the story appearing now. And not even that.” — Byron Katie

 

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@How to be wise I really don't agree that face is the only thing they judge you on. 

I still disagree that women only care about looks. I've seen girls become into guys who they didn't fancy initially due to confidence. 

That's gotta be total bullshit. 

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Went running in the park today getting the little bit of sunshine I could.

As I was running made good eye contact with a girl, walking alone. I ran on then stopped in the sun. 

She kept walking slowly & kinda angled towards me, she was open to approach. 

... Then I pussied out. Then she walked past ... could still run & catch her up? PUSSIED OUT, HESISTATED. 

Walked home alone & miserable, feeling beta. The loser effect psychology kicked in. 

Walked home hating myself, feeling hasn't gone away. 

Still just a pussy loser. 

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Can't get rid of the loser feeling. It's making me tired. 

I can't believe I'm still pussying out so often, It's often cold & wet where I live, & everything's closed. A sunny weekend afternoon is rare & im often inside. 

I missed my chance. 

I'm meant to have an abundance mindset, but I'm just getting older, & not taking enough action, the chances feel scarce.

Feel like such fucking incel. 

Edited by Striving for more

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@Striving for more

Hey man, it happens to the best of us. 

I've been mostly online dating and pussied out a few times. 

I also had multiple DTF girls that went MIA as well, felt like garbage. 

I also haven't been cold approaching like I want and focused mostly online due to COVID (but that is also an excuse). 

I'm also realizing that anxiety is very subtle and the ego can destroy any opportunities you have. You would literally need to approach within the first 5-seconds (at least for me) before the brain starts to make any excuse It needs to not approach. Then that's when anxiety appears and you completely bitch-out. However, it's not YOU, but the EGO. 

Also, I recommend Paul Janka course for day game. He's married now, but in his prime, he's considered a legend in NYC. After completing his course, he suggest to be IN and OUT quickly. Never carry-on a conversation and get her number, swiftly. Basically, it's all a volume/numbers game to be successful. If a women gives you objection, you need to learn how to handle them and push through. But, also know when it's a dud. 

Anyway, I expect to put a journey here as well.

Look forward to pushing through this together :) 

Edited by Pudgey

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@Pudgey Thanks for encouragement man. 

I stay away from online game, I have zero good pictures, zero social status so it wouldn't work for me right now. Maybe I will consider it if I can get some good pics that aren't selfies, but still I always will want to overcome approach anxiety either way. 

 game is a spiritual pursuit for me. Pre arranged sex through an app sounds so hollow, I want lots of sex, but I want to be the guy that can approach, charm & close the girls in real life, because that's hard & counterintuitive. I also feel like that would lead to better sex. 

 

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13 minutes ago, Pudgey said:

@Striving for more

I also had multiple DTF girls that went MIA as well, felt like garbage. 

Nice, I've barely ever had that in my life tbh. 

Hopefully I'll change that soon.

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27 minutes ago, Striving for more said:

@Pudgey Thanks for encouragement man. 

I stay away from online game, I have zero good pictures, zero social status so it wouldn't work for me right now. Maybe I will consider it if I can get some good pics that aren't selfies, but still I always will want to overcome approach anxiety either way. 

 game is a spiritual pursuit for me. Pre arranged sex through an app sounds so hollow, I want lots of sex, but I want to be the guy that can approach, charm & close the girls in real life, because that's hard & counterintuitive. I also feel like that would lead to better sex. 

 

Hey, no worries. Game is hard and only true warriors go down this road for massive self-development. So, I'm with you on this! 

Regards to your skepticism for online dating, it still requires game and working through volume. Yes, having great photos will help and will most likely require you to have professional photography. I'd even consider professional photoshop to give yourself extra points in attraction. The reason why online dating is great in conjunction with cold approaching, you're developing multiple ways to generate leads. The more ways to generate leads, the higher chance you will get laid. More Leads = More Numbers = More Dates = More Lays. 

You will still suffer through short-comings if you don't have proper game and ability to text. Even when you approach a girl in real life and get her number, you're still put right back into online game (i.e texting). No matter how much you cold approach, without a proper way to text, you can still lose the girl. Because most of the time, it will route back to you texting her, so understanding how to manage your leads via texting is always better to have than not. 

25 minutes ago, Striving for more said:

Nice, I've barely ever had that in my life tbh. 

Hopefully I'll change that soon.

It's still an up and down road, that's apart of the game. I feel the way you feel most of the time, but it's apart of the development process. 

Occasionally, I'll get girls super interested in me and then ghost. Other times, I'd make a mistake and they'd ghost and/or not respond. I used to delay on dates, which is bad. I learned that the hard way. Always setup dates the week of (or as early as the same or next day). 

Also, don't take the advice of men who has less than 100 lays and/or hasn't made at least 1,000 approaches with some success. I only take my advice from guys who been there and done that with a track record of success. Otherwise, you will be getting shit advice from How To Be Wise. 

Edited by Pudgey

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On 1/5/2021 at 9:41 AM, How to be wise said:

As I said, the girl will have decided in the first three seconds of seeing you. Nothing you say after that will change her mind. Your job is to see the result, whether you passed or not. 

I agree

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15 hours ago, Pudgey said:

You would literally need to approach within the first 5-seconds (at least for me)

Yes but when you warm up you can wait 15 minutes and still go for it. It is a process just like anything else.

15 hours ago, Pudgey said:

Even when you approach a girl in real life and get her number, you're still put right back into online game (i.e texting).

Wow! Never thought about it in that way. Thanks man!

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That comment was intended for my main jounral : delelted oops.

Edited by Striving for more

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And ... I'm back > I actually forgot about this journal for a while. I Thank the strucutral genius of this forum format for quickly refinding this. 

 

So ... I have not been capable of pick up for months, unable walk much ... but had some quick oppurtunities all which I pussied out

... But today was different. 

I see a cute, feminine latino & we make eye contact 

I hesitate about 30 seconds (should I approach now?) ... I make eye contact with her again, I sense some keenness in her gaze

I hesitate some more ... 

Finally I approach > " Hey I think your attractive I'm Bob" > she responds with ..? (too shaky & not present enough to even capture her name) 

I notice shakiness & tension in the body > I ask generic questions & she looks disinterested, slightly uncomfortable 

I get lost for words, stumbling a bit, & started saying irrelevant stuff "I was going to not approach because at first you looked like 16" (Just stop, say less than necessary) 

I say ohh " you're from valencia" ... Awkward pause, lost for words

she puts her headphones on & steps back a meter..

I wait about 10 seconds, pretend to look at my phone, then I think Persistence, ("she wants the approach, but ur not doing enough")

I put on a kinda forced smile : " Am I not interesting enough for you?" 

She laughs & puts her guard down a bit, I start to realize she's not fluent, so I speak to her in her language, this seemed to work, I see her comfort level rise & she started to smile a bit more, I continued to asked her more generic questions, although slightly more open & engaging ones with a slightly looser tone. 

we then walked on to the train & I asked some more generic questions, still unable to flirt or make her laugh much though at least the shakiness is gone

I finally got her number before she left ... I Don't expect her to reply to me, but I'm so glad I approached. 

I'm going to need regular practice to kill the shakiness but it's really hard for me right now, I'm unable to use my body much 

Edited by Striving for more

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Today I went to the post office. This woman accidentally pushed in front of me & I politely pointed it out to her. 

In fact, she was exceptionally hot. 

  • Age  roughly 34 - 38
  • In workout / Yoga clothes, toned 
  • Tanned, radiant, glowing face & soft cheeks,
  • Friendly, feminine energy

We laughed a bit about the que. Then I went to post my items. 

As I did this, I kept thinking about how I would approach her ... But my mind kept making excuses why I shouldn't.

 (the unconscious automatic acceptance of these excuses just killed my courage in the moment). 

"She's probably married" "Girls only like older guys" 

We walked out at the same time & there was my chance.

Then she walked fast ahead (Why not just run up to her in the rain?)

I saw the bus. I just walked on the bus home. 

On the bus, I felt this common empty feeling of regret & cowardice. A long overdue feeling that I won't stand no more. 

She seemed so perfect. So dam hot! She was just everything, physically & energetically. 

 

It was at this painful moment on the bus that I realized ... I need pickup ... and pickup needs me. 

It is a spiritual need. And amongst the hollowness of society & my life & tinder, what I need is pickup. 

 

I have approached sometimes these past few months ... But I notice a pattern. 

I only seem to approach when the situation is "reasonable", "appropriate". 

It's only when no one is looking, the girls exactly my age & it "makes sense" that I would approach. If there's any "reasonable" excuse not to, or imagined embarrassment, I coward away.

I need to step up to the challenge. 

I need to be willing to approach that super hot older feminine, yoga girl, who seems too mature & out of my league. 

Basically, I need to approach any women I feel attracted to, regardless of the situation, her age, the location or what excuses my mind generates.

No bullshit Religious commitment to the approach. 

Why only resign myself to dumb innocent & confused looking 19 year olds? (I probably approach them more because they seem easier).

I am destined to express my sexual desire, It is part of my being, It's time to have the courage to be authentic. 

Edited by Striving for more

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I just had vision for the kind of women I want to meet for myself. 

(I don't want a monogamous girlfriend ... But I want to regularly sleep with a women like this) :

  • Beautiful in an Mediterranean exotic way
  • speaks 3 + languages, sexy accent (especially Hispanic or Italian, but I am not rigid in what would turn me on)
  • Feminine, likes dance, yoga, Intuitive
  • High sex drive, loves sex, (No stage blue repression)
  • Loves being a "slut", likes dancing sexy & dressing sexy
  • Adventurous, outgoing
  • Fun, risk taking 
  • Likes extreme sports, would hop on a motorbike or a quadbike with me, would go drag racing with me,  
  • Likes weird parties, likes dress up, "pimps & hoes" parties, 
  • Likes art & grand displays, fireworks & nature, would go tripping in the forest with me. 

Infinite freedom, deep connections with multiple beautiful women, living the Island life.

Ibeza, Mexico, Portugal, Canary Islands, Columbia. Italy. 

I know what lifestyle I desire, & it isn't "stage orange" or crafted by movies or some shit.

I was born for this. I wasn't born for the Monk life, but I am spiritual, spiritual is subjective to you always. 

Edited by Striving for more

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