The White Belt

Really Struggling With Meditation

18 posts in this topic

Hey all.

 

So, I recently, unfortunately, gave up my meditation practice.

 

I'm finding it really difficult. I was doing twenty minutes daily and it drove me nuts. It was uncomfortable, my back hurt a lot, my mind was going crazy with its constant chatter, I kept looking at the clock without really meaning to, my legs would go so numb I would have to stretch them out during the meditation and it would make me generally agitated.

 

I was thinking about just doing 5 minutes for a few months but is this really enough?

 

Let me know your thoughts on it all.

 

Thanks - BeginnerActualizer


“In the beginner’s mind there are many possibilities, but in the expert’s there are few” 
― Shunryu Suzuki

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Starting off with 5 mins is fine, but try not to stay on this amount for that long, id say one month should be enough to get use to it, and then after increase it to 10 mins. Over time youll be able to sit for longer periods. By a year you should be doing at least 30 mins but if you stick to the habit thatll be easy for you trust me.

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@BeginnerActualizer

The posture should be steady and should be very, very blissful, comfortable. So never try to distort your body, and never try to achieve postures which are uncomfortable. If you can be steady and comfortable in a chair, it is perfectly okay — no need to try a lotus posture and force your body unnecessarily. A posture should be such that you can forget your body. 

 

 

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Try to sit down on your couch, sitting comfortably with eyes open. Don't look at the watch. "Do nothing." Whatever comes up is fine. Do this for 10 minutes the first month, 20 minutes the second and then look how it goes. This will help you.

If you still feel very shitty at times doing this, ask yourself: How could it be that you feel so screwed when sitting comfortably. There's your starting point. :P


They want reality, so I give 'em a fatal dosage.

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I suggest you do the mindfulness meditation instead of "do nothing" , it gets you better results and it's not as uncomfortable. And don't sit cross-legged, it's too painful, just sit on a chair, lol.

 

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@Ry4n Thank you. I think I will go back to five. @Prabhaker Should I disipline myself to sit perfectly straight in order to have a more effective meditation better down the line? Or am I better off slouching a little bit and actually doing it, lol. @Azrael Sit on the couch normally or cross legged on the couch? @SaynotoKlaus If I sit on the chair am I also depriving myself of getting a better meditation in the future or can you go all the way with a chair meditation?

 

Thanks all.


“In the beginner’s mind there are many possibilities, but in the expert’s there are few” 
― Shunryu Suzuki

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@BeginnerActualizer I have not had great success meditating, and just switched to concentrated contemplation with my eyes open and had some immediate exciting results. I may need to go back to meditation at some point, but this was so amazing I have to just keep trying what happened before for now. Maybe it could help you. I have to add that it wasn't even a deliberate plan to switch, it's just in hindsight I realised this helped because I was to dozy in meditation when what I need was the opposite.

Edited by Neo

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1 hour ago, BeginnerActualizer said:

@Azrael Sit on the couch normally or cross legged on the couch? 

Normally, you can sit cross-legged when you can mediate for 20-30 minutes without much discomfort.


They want reality, so I give 'em a fatal dosage.

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Take this advice for what it's worth , I'm just a regular dude. 

 

Stop using a timer, it's just a distraction that causes constant thoughts like "I wonder how much time I have left" " I wonder if I'm halfway done yet" "why hasn't the timer gone off yet, I know it's been 20 minutes by now" . As far as sitting positions , I've found cross legged with my back against a wall for support to be the most comfortable . I get too tired sitting on a comfy couch and I lack the flexibility to maintain an upright posture to sit cross legged with no back support . Also, I made a homemade meditation schedule and taped it to the wall where I sit. Monday is loving kindness, then death contemplation, then vipassana , then strong determination , then do nothing , then vipassana again, then a guided meditation of my choice which is generally some kind of self inquiry . This keeps things from getting boring. 

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4 hours ago, BeginnerActualizer said:

Should I disipline myself to sit perfectly straight in order to have a more effective meditation better down the line? Or am I better off slouching a little bit and actually doing it, lol.

A posture should be such that you can forget your body. If a seeker cannot sit on the floor straight, comfortably, and he has to force himself, and it becomes uncomfortable and painful, then it is better to sit straight on a chair and the whole body relaxed -- as if the whole body is hanging on the backbone.  But let the back of the chair be straight. You must have seen pictures and statues of ancient Egyptian kings and queens.

Edited by Prabhaker

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@BeginnerActualizer Leo never mentioned that meditating cross-legged is important in any of his videos, so i guess it doesn't matter that much. If i remember correctly, when he had his first enlightenment experience, he was sitting on a bench.

Personally, i noticed that in the cross-legged position you have a better back posture, but the leg pain pretty much ruins your meditation sessions if you are not flexible.

Edited by SaynotoKlaus

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23 hours ago, BeginnerActualizer said:

Hey all.

 

So, I recently, unfortunately, gave up my meditation practice.

 

I'm finding it really difficult. I was doing twenty minutes daily and it drove me nuts. It was uncomfortable, my back hurt a lot, my mind was going crazy with its constant chatter, I kept looking at the clock without really meaning to, my legs would go so numb I would have to stretch them out during the meditation and it would make me generally agitated.

 

I was thinking about just doing 5 minutes for a few months but is this really enough?

 

Let me know your thoughts on it all.

 

Thanks - BeginnerActualizer

An ancient Zen story tells: A monk after the first week of his meditation practise tells his master "master I cannot understand what is wrong with me I am in constant pain and my mind won't silence I feel restless and I can't control my actions so I cannot find peace" the master says "it's okay it will pass" .after two weeks of more practise the monk goes back to the teacher and says "master I feel reat now I feel happy and blissful I have no tensions on my body and I feel free like a bird" the teacher answers "Its okay,it will pass"....try to grasp this teaching and maybe you 'll undestand the nature of your mind.do not attach to phenomena be who you really are!

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Iv had that to doing 45min everyday. It seems to be a part of getting better. I dont see why you should cut back. Eventually it pass and for every hard time that will happen. You learn to be less and less resistent. 

Its realy a great time now for some bigger gains if your into that.

Those hard Times is absolutly critical points when improving in anything. To take to the next level.

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I have meditated for 3 months now and this is what I learned about sitting posture.

First I meditated sitting on a chair. I have used the back of a chair for support. This resulted in making me sleepy. Later I started meditating with my back straight and it was much much better. At some point I decided to try out cross-legged meditation sitting on the floor. If you are a beginner you need a pillow for that so your bottom is above the ground 5-10 cm (for my lovely american friends it is 2-4 inches). When I tried this for the first time it was really difficult. I could not put my knees on my legs because I was not flexible enough. Despite of that, I noticed that I was able to be more present in this sitting posture. I kept attempting to meditate cross-legged and few weeks later I had started practicing a little bit of yoga. This helped a lot. I still struggle sometimes, there are days when it does not feel very comfortable but some days it just flows. My meditation sessions are 25 minutes so it is not very long but that is the duration that is perfect for me at the moment.

Just yesterday I have meditated sitting on a chair and I was surprised to find out that now it is easier to meditate cross-legged. It took 3 months for me, that is some time, yes. but if you look at self-actualization as a life long quest it is really not that much.

If you can do 5 minutes - do 5. Build gradually. When you sit for 5, 10 or 15 minutes remember that it is not possible to fail. It is not a competition. You dedicated this time for concentration, contemplation, observing your thoughts and breathing or whatever your approach is. At those 5 minutes everything else is secondary! There is no need to evaluate how are you doing, is it "good" meditation or a "bad" one. There is no need to be self-critical because you are thinking to much. Whenever you notice that you drift away you focus back on meditation. That is the best thing you can do. In my opinion even 5 minutes of real dedicated meditation can be very useful.

I am a beginner myself but everything I wrote here is based on my experience. Hope this helps one way or another.

TakeCare

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Remembered few more things that might be useful.

If you meditate in the morning:

  • Exercise, do some stretching.
  • Have a shower.
  • Meditate before breakfast.

If you meditate in the evening:

  • Do not meditate straight after work because your mind might be to active or too tired.
  • Do not meditate too late because of obvious reason: sleepiness.

Also do it daily and take notes on what helps and interferes with meditation. I can assure that no matter what you do you will have some days that won't feel very good but do it anyway. Think long term!

TakeCare

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