How to find common ground within yourself?

[DefinitelyNotARobot]

I am talking about finding a common ground between thought and emotion. Sometimes I can observe a divide between those two.

I've always been kind of an analytical and "rational" minded person, but I've been becoming more and more aware of the importance of intuition and emotion.

I've been growing a lot lately simply because of one realization. I observed that there is a MASSIVE mind bias going on within myself. It's like "I" am the mind and the body is just a dumb object carrying the mind (as if the two were separate objects).

I started giving more attention to my body and my emotions now, but it's still very tricky for me! Here is an example:

Let's say I feel unloved. Now I might feel unloved, but my mind would immediately come up with reasons as to why this isn't true.

"Oh but what about your family? They love you! And what about your friends? They love you too!"

But it doesn't change anything about the fact that I still FEEL unloved. I always dismissed my emotions because I saw them as irrational and stupid. I've actually been observing this phenomena quiet a lot!

An example of this is: Everybody knows that they should be themselves. Like, duh? How often have your heard somebody say: "You just gotta be yourself!" But how many people actually know HOW to be themselves? And that is the problem with me!

I think that I know what I should behave like, but I don't know how to actually do it.

I know that I SHOULD be grateful for what I have instead of feeling down because "Oh nobody loves me" even though there are enough people who love me, but I don't know HOW. And now, whenever I feel unloved, my mind goes "Oh but that's WRONG you are sooo WRONG! WRONG WRONG WRONG!", simply because it doesn't make sense, from a rational perspective.

How do I transcend that? How do I accept myself and my emotional views (is that a thing?), without feeling stupid? How do I find a common ground between my analytical side and my emotional side?

I've tried to talk to my mother about how lonely and depressed I feel, but she just did the same thing as my mind and she just dismissed it. She said: "Oh but I am here and your grandparents are here and your aunt is here and your friends are here, you are so privileged I had it way harder than you did and there are many people who had a harder time growing up than you did."

And yes. It IS true! It really is, my mind tells me the same thing. But I STILL feel so fucking lonely. And I have many more emotional issues thanks to my that just won't stop bothering me, thanks to my PTSD, but it just doesn't make any fucking sense to me.

Funny enough: I know that I should stop trying to think this through. You can't "think" and emotion through. I know that and it seems so irrational to me, but it STILL won't stop frustrating the hell out of me. This is exactly what I mean. It feels like this entire post is fucking stupid and doesn't make any sense at all, but yet this issue won't stop stressing me the fuck out.

I hope yall can help me, peace!