ShugendoRa

I get really triggered when my girl shows her ass in public

13 posts in this topic

I get triggered when my girl shows her boobs or ass in public. I get really triggered when my family members look at her when she is exposed to males in my family. How do I change that? I fixed some of my issues im not as mad in public but when im home and male family members are near i get nerotic when she exposes her ass or thighs 

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1000000000000% accept, embrace and love the possibility of "your girl" having an orgy with all of your male friends except for you, on your bed.  

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she is insecure that's why she does it. You are insecure that's why you care.

Your girl???

 

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4 minutes ago, K Ghoul said:

@ShugendoRa how long did you date before she started sleeping with you? If she was easy that could be the reason for the triggering - if you could easily get her, there is a scary possibility that anyone who puts in the same amount of effort that you put in could get her too. 

nah... bad advice. dumb stereotype that girls are conditioned with "if they don't play hard to get they are easy."

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@ShugendoRa what do you mean exactly? 

Are we talking about going to a nudist beach/coming out of the shower at home or does she intentionally show her boobs and ass to people to cause a certain reaction? 

I would get pretty triggered with the second option as well. 

I think it would be good to talk about how you feel when she does that with her. Without blaming or judging, just telling her how you feel and see what happens. 

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51 minutes ago, Farnaby said:

@ShugendoRa what do you mean exactly? 

Are we talking about going to a nudist beach/coming out of the shower at home or does she intentionally show her boobs and ass to people to cause a certain reaction? 

I would get pretty triggered with the second option as well.

Exactly! If she does it intentionally I would picture that as good to not like that. That's not the type of Girlfriend I want. Because - this would be an Indicator of a instabile Psyche to me. Who knows what comes next?

If she's just in Hotpants or Bikini, calm cown maybe it's really just insecurity @ShugendoRa . By the way great Avatar, I hope you are not as down as the Album. The  Lyrics can be quite depressing even if the Songs are catchy. Started listening 1 Month ago to this^^

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12 hours ago, ShugendoRa said:

my girl shows her boobs or ass in public.

O.o


If you have no confidence in yourself, you are twice defeated in the race of life. But with confidence you have won, even before you start.” -- Marcus Garvey

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What helped me is to reframe it as "that's my girl, she is beautiful and everyone knows that". This way, i was completely fine with all the attention she got dressing anyway she wanted as opposed to the girl i dated before her whom which i was extremely jealous when someone looked at her or she did something slightly provocative.

Before i was insecure, i was scared to be alone and i had to protect my relationship at all costs, which led me toward an abusive path sometimes.

After that, i grew as a person and as a man, i developed an abundance mentality, empathy etc, which made the relationship way healthier and the girl i was with was prettier and more popular, thousands of followers on Instagram, lots of men messaging her constantly, i had to not care at all to make it work.

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You have to set boundaries and be willing to walk if she doesn't respect them. 

If you set a boundary, you must enforce it. If you fold you've lost her respect and her moist approval. 

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Show her that you really don't give a fuck when other men look at her. I mean ice cold detachment.

The only thing you should be doing is showing her with YOUR eyes that YOU dig her. Additionally compliment her on her bodily qualities and outfits.

It's the insecurity and the fact you might bring it up with her that she should be more modest that could plant the idea in her head of, "Oh he thinks I'm a whore because of my outfit, and that he can control me and tell me what to do! Well fuck him now I  want to flirt with other guys, or cheat if he becomes too much of a dick."

Guess what happens if she does fulfill that? Nothing, you can't control what she does. You just walk and move on to the next girl.


hrhrhtewgfegege

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14 hours ago, Recursoinominado said:

What helped me is to reframe it as "that's my girl, she is beautiful and everyone knows that". This way, i was completely fine with all the attention she got dressing anyway she wanted as opposed to the girl i dated before her whom which i was extremely jealous when someone looked at her or she did something slightly provocative.

Before i was insecure, i was scared to be alone and i had to protect my relationship at all costs, which led me toward an abusive path sometimes.

After that, i grew as a person and as a man, i developed an abundance mentality, empathy etc, which made the relationship way healthier and the girl i was with was prettier and more popular, thousands of followers on Instagram, lots of men messaging her constantly, i had to not care at all to make it work.

Love this!

Of course there are boundaries, but if she's not doing anything considered cheating (by your relationship terms), being negative and insecure is causing YOU the most harm :| 

Focus on gratitude and the good in such situations, such as the blessing she is to your life rather than making yourself feeling shit, you deserve happiness :D

 

 

 


"Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it" -Rumi

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