bmcnicho

Why are men expected to provide for women?

61 posts in this topic

12 minutes ago, WaveInTheOcean said:

Women build the dream itself (the structures necessary for the dream to continue, namely, human bodies. Women build babies in their stomach. Without new babies the dream would end).

The dream will end the moment I die anyways, so why should I care?

Having babies is totally optional.


If you have no confidence in yourself, you are twice defeated in the race of life. But with confidence you have won, even before you start.” -- Marcus Garvey

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4 hours ago, remember said:

you are talking about your last relationship? :P still hurting?

you've clearly confused electrobeam with someone else if you knew anything about my previous relationship.

Not everyone is in their 30s like you :P

1 hour ago, Leo Gura said:

The problem is that you guys are not aware of your self-biases so they warp your understanding of reality.

I'm aware of my self bias. I know what i want and what my agenda is. 

Your first comment generalises self bias too much across genders. Men have to pay more because women have babies ends at stage blue. We have day care, nannies, equal rights, and no social pressure for families to have kids in developed democracies. 

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22 minutes ago, electroBeam said:

Your first comment generalises self bias too much across genders. Men have to pay more because women have babies ends at stage blue. We have day care, nannies, equal rights, and no social pressure for families to have kids in developed democracies. 

that’s actually blue orange thinking. we also have orphanages and not enough daycare and better or worse daycare and well, all of that is for free. so we just give the children to someone else and pay them to love them more than we do, if we can make enough money so to say. ??‍♀️

if not lucky if the grandparents are close by. and hopefully get our jobs back after with luck the second one.

please guys do a reality check from time to time.

Edited by remember

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1 hour ago, Gesundheit said:

The dream will end the moment I die anyways, so why should I care?

Selfish unconscious ignorant newb❤️

Nah, death is illusory. The character you think you are will end, but the dreams of God (you are God) will of course go on???


Can you bite your own teeth?  --  “What a caterpillar calls the end of the world we call a butterfly.

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10 minutes ago, remember said:

that’s actually blue orange thinking. 

my name's electrobeam, not blue orange.

11 minutes ago, remember said:

that’s actually blue orange thinking. we also have orphanages and not enough daycare and better or worse daycare and well, all of that is for free. so we just give the children to someone else and pay them to love them more than we do. ??‍♀️

Leo said men have to pay more because women put babies through their legs. What I'm saying is that's mostly bollocks, because some women dont want babies, you can adopt babies rather than putting them through your legs, and even if the women gives birth, after that there's no good reason why men can't take the role of raising children while women do the work.

oooooo shhhhhhh I already know what you're gonna say "men cant raise children because men are stupid!"

Let me remind you gender is factually a social construct. Some men are better at raising children then women. Some human beings have penises, but have very feminine, woman, right hemisphere dominant brains - like left handers. 

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The only reason this question is asked is because we live in an age of absolute luxury and choice. You can order take out, hire a house cleaning service, get daycare, there a vacuum cleaners, etc. Running a house, cooking, cleaning and raising children well is a phenomenal amount of work. 

It's funny how we focus on the remaining problems and inequalities when really, we live in a sort of paradise. Male or female, do whatever you want. Kids or no kids, marry or not, work or not, no one really cares. 


My Youtube Channel- Light on Earth “We dance round in a ring and suppose, but the Secret sits in the middle and knows.”― Robert Frost

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Please consider what you're writing before you write. Be mindful of your motivations behind the speech. If it's not a pure motivation, why even write anything?

Stop chimping around.

I know this is a place to relax from all the gruesome work of spirituality and personal development,  but stop bullshiting yourself and others.

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@blue orange (it’s not taken yet) girls go for it it sounds tempting.

 

@electroBeam

yes and some girls don’t expect men to provide but are in situations where they earn a lot less money and in general its more about sharing your cake or get a woman who is not interested in sharing hers and you don’t need to exploit for it, so you can still feel like there was gender equality.

Edited by remember

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@WaveInTheOcean 

On 27/07/2020 at 10:26 AM, Leo Gura said:

The entire universe ends.

You're not appreciating this.

 

On 27/07/2020 at 1:58 PM, Leo Gura said:

Indeed. End the universe, if you dare. Don't worry about us, we're not real anyway ;)

@WaveInTheOcean are you saying that Leo is Selfish unconscious ignorant newb? 


If you have no confidence in yourself, you are twice defeated in the race of life. But with confidence you have won, even before you start.” -- Marcus Garvey

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2 hours ago, Gesundheit said:

@WaveInTheOcean 

 

@WaveInTheOcean are you saying that Leo is Selfish unconscious ignorant newb? 

You misunderstand what Leo is saying.

The notion of "the entire universe" is just a concept. What we call "the entire universe" is in fact just God/Love/Nothingness viewed as something that appears as an external world perceived by an individual (subject-object-duality, which is an illusion).

There is no universe to end, because the universe itself is just God's imagination. Of course God could stop imagining it up, but to believe God would do that, just because one of his characters, you, me, Leo, dies, is delusion.

Death is equal to dying as a perceived subject in a dream during your nighttime in bed. What happens when death happens in a dream? You wake up, i.e. you continue existing in another dream ("waking life").

This dream of life IS God/Love/Consciousness/Nothingness.

You as a human being is just one of God's infinite imagined up separate selves. 

EDIT: But yes, if Leo believes he can end the entire universe in some DMT trip, or whatever, then yes, he's deluded. Sure, it can perhaps feel as if you COULD "end it all" during a high dose LSD / 5meo / DMT trip, but that is just God showing you his infinite capabilities, even though, sure, it feels as though you are God during the trip, which, again, sure, you are, but you always are! You have never not been God. God is literally all there is. And it is you.

Edited by WaveInTheOcean

Can you bite your own teeth?  --  “What a caterpillar calls the end of the world we call a butterfly.

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@WaveInTheOcean you're just using fancy words to talk about a mundane event called death


If you have no confidence in yourself, you are twice defeated in the race of life. But with confidence you have won, even before you start.” -- Marcus Garvey

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1 minute ago, Gesundheit said:

@WaveInTheOcean you're just using fancy words to talk about a mundane event called death

Calling any event in the universe, even an ant crawling around on your feet, for mundane, shows ignorance. It's absolutely completely mystical.


Can you bite your own teeth?  --  “What a caterpillar calls the end of the world we call a butterfly.

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@WaveInTheOcean yes I am ignorant. What else?


If you have no confidence in yourself, you are twice defeated in the race of life. But with confidence you have won, even before you start.” -- Marcus Garvey

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I think you miss something here... Women provide very much for men too - but in a more subtle and invisible way. And we are "expected" to do this as well. You may give her your money, but she will most likely return it with her soul, something much more valuable anyway. Male energy holds the physical world more easily, and female energy holds the invisible world more easily - so we help each other out. 

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15 minutes ago, Keyhole said:

I don't think that a woman wanting to stay home to take care of the household is necessarily solely stage blue behavior. It takes a lot of work to care for a child, to clean a home, to tend to the garden, and to care for any animals assuming that they have them.  Children do better when they have their mother at home with them.

I think it's fine for people to have their own preferences but I don't think that those preferences need to come with putting another person down for their life choices. For instance just as Leo would not date a stage blue woman I would not date Leo for his pickup history. 

I also don't believe that wanting to have a child is necessarily a selfish thing to do, I've had many many synchronicities lately revolving around having a child, something that I never would have considered doing.  The Divine can set you up with that option.  And what do you know, it just hit 11:11 as I typed this.

I don't think that it's wrong for a woman to want to be cared for, but a relationship is a partnership and so the energy put into it must be equal.  You think that wanting to have them or patriarchal relationship is a bad thing, and yet those women who are staying home raising children in the appropriate way are the ones that are creating a solid future for the next generation of people.

You guys think it is so easy to take this life path? If I wanted to have such a life for myself, which I do, I would have to somehow be able to heal the trauma that has happened to me in the past, I would have to learn how to trust and communicate with another individual in a healthy manner, I would have to improve my executive functioning skills, I would have to overcome most of my fears, and a huge portion of my ego would have to die.

Nothing of genuine heart is as simple as just running off into the sunset and expecting someone to pay for all of your expenses, and then expecting something like that to last.

I very much agree with this! Actualized.org would be better if Leo could transform himself into a being that was both man and a woman at the same time because there is something about spiritual development from the female point of view that is left out in this whole institution :) 

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9 hours ago, Member said:

Lol, you don't understand. Taking care a child is not easy and women are better at doing this job. As for the choice, in a normal, healthy relationship there are both partners deciding that. Men should protect the woman and the woman should protect the child. It's about taking care of the weak out of love and responsibility, this has nothing to do with competition for fuck' sake.

You see, everyone is thinks that there gender is better. I can already tell that yer woman just by the way you say they is. And guys get competitive there and woman get hyper creative. I love both genders the same because I am a man and sometimes I do wish I was a woman. And them I imagine what it be like to be a woman and that makes me want to be a man. Which I already am which infiltrates the love into my soul. 


Love life and your Health, INFJ Visionary

 

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13 minutes ago, Khr said:

@bmcnicho generally to each their own.

I have a successful career and make a good amount of money. I date guys who have successful careers and make good money too. I like it when a guy spoils me with gifts/pays for dinners. In my case, I know I spend a lot of money/time on maintenance - hair (around 300$-400$ every 4 months), nails (I do my own nails and that takes around 2-3 hours every 2 weeks), waxing (~100$ a month), fitness classes (~120+ a month), facials (around 300$ a month), makeup, products, nice clothes, healthy food, and the list goes on. These things make me happy and make me feel feminine.
 

I like having a man conscious enough to appreciate all the things I do and I feel safe and comfortable knowing that I can keep doing all these things and not have to worry about the money (for example when we go out or go on a small trip). And I know that the guys I date can afford it. 


There are plenty of women who don’t think the way I do, everyone is different, you just have to find what works for you.

Please don't take for granted the amount of money you make. Money is scarce in these parts as there are people who dont make much money. Money is a precious resource. 


Love life and your Health, INFJ Visionary

 

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2 hours ago, diamondpenguin said:

Please don't take for granted the amount of money you make. Money is scarce in these parts as there are people who dont make much money. Money is a precious resource. 

i guess she mainly wanted to show how much time, energy and money women spend to be attractive - not every woman does spend that much money but a lot of women spend a lot of energy in testing different kinds of cosmetic products and methods to do their hair or for fashion to be attractive, a lot of males have high expectations which are not done by natural looks alone. her example is in a sense really representative how guys take all of that for granted. not even the motherhood argument of nine month + health or life risk is enough for some guys in this thread or that we ruin our figure and have to do post natal workout to get into shape again, no of course the guy could stay home after we have done the main work. its actually hilarious if you think about how little some men are willing to do to be attractive, maybe that’s because they feel safe with their money. but wait until women do all of that alone and men earn less money - i know a lot of strong women, mostly friends of my mom, no man could handle because most men don’t like independent women, they use to put out the emancipated flag but if confronted mostly the same old story.

that‘s actually why i liked your first response in the thread - don’t let yourself get corrupted, focus on the emotional stuff and figure out the financial stuff together - the same with having children, some people want some don’t, i know some women who don’t want, i know some men who don’t want, i think it’s a personal decision and in no way selfish in both directions, but somehow if it does not fit there it does not fit there, and the own decision then must be consequentialy accepted and not to be pushed as responsibility on the partner - different life plans ofc can be a reason to not stay together. 

sorry the last part is def infiltrated by my earlier posts.

i liked your first response ? that is the main message.

and ones life and happiness is a precious re-source, it re sources through giving and taking but certainly not if counted in money because no one could pay back what they owe their mothers.

Edited by remember

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19 hours ago, bmcnicho said:

evolutionary biology

You already know the answer.

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3 hours ago, diamondpenguin said:

Money is a precious resource. 

I'm telling myself this every day. 

Thank you 


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

Cleared out ignore list today. 

..

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