WELCOME TO PICKUP

[Chumbimba]

First cold approach. I GOT BLOWN THE FUCK OUT LAST NIGHT!  I mean I wanted to jump off a building after it happened. After my friend and I played basketball yesterday we saw 2 girls. when we went to 711 they were there too. My friend was trying to talk me out of approaching. "It's creepy" "They are going to think that you are weird" "blah blah bullshit," I said fuck it I will never get better if I don't try

approached one of the girls and said

ME: "Hey I saw you and I think you're cute can I have your number". 

HER: (didn't even look me in the eye) NO. 

Her Friend: *Laughing

Wow, I was destroyed on the inside. Felt like I was going to die. Strangely though I have never felt more alive. It humbled me and made me realize how bad I really am with girls lol even though I tricked myself into having it figured out. My friend shat on me for approaching but ATLEAST I DID IT !! 

I have a lot to learn but I ready to get better with girls after 23 years of avoidance  

 

[Gesundheit]

@Chumbimba she may have been interested in you. Next time don't take no for an answer. Tell her I don't take no for an answer in a humorous way. Don't force it either. Just don't give up too early. You'll get better with time but very good you've made the first step.

Edited July 28, 2020 by Gesundheit

[JonasVE12]

Only ask for her number after you have build connection with her and there is attraction between you guys. She needs to know hints of your personality before she can trust giving you her number. As far as she knows, you can be a psychopath. First talk and flirt a bit and the chances of her giving you her number increase dramatically. Talking to her needs to be an emotional experience for you both instead of just asking if you can have her number. 

[Leo Gura]

47 minutes ago, Chumbimba said:

ME: "Hey I saw you and I think you're cute can I have your number".

Hahahahaha....

You can't ask for her number right of the bat! That will never work.

Think of it from her POV. She has no idea who you are. Would you give your number to some random dude a 7/11?

You must build an emotional connect first.

But good job in that you approached at all. Getting blown out like that is good for ya. Grows some hair on your balls

[Chumbimba]

@JonasVE12 I get that now  I wasn't prepared I had the idea that I would never get rejected. I guess I just don't know what to say because it seems like every girl will reject me before I approach them. 

@Gesundheit Nah fam. She was not interested at all. my dog likes me more than she ever could. 

[Zak]

Dude here are some tips:

1. Try not to approach when there are two girls. Stop that.

2. Dont ask for her number right of the bat. That's too direct. It's like telling her, "put your number down and will hook up tonight".

3. Don't complement her like that. Start that later in the conversation. Let her not feeling you are picking her up the first few minutes.

55 minutes ago, Chumbimba said:

HER: (didn't even look me in the eye) NO. 

Her Friend: *Laughing

You should have added:

ME: Why do you think I am not cute enough? (Make it humorous).

Don't beat yourself yo death. You are going to learn it through rejections.

JUST BE CHILL AND HUMOROUS

[Chumbimba]

@Leo Gura I see why I was so afraid of talking to girls though because that shit hurt  

 

[Zak]

Go through this beautiful thread at least once. So many insights here. From Leo and us all.

And wait for Leo. He is brewing some related content for us in the future soon. Probably his next video.

Edited July 28, 2020 by Zak

[Arcangelo]

46 minutes ago, Chumbimba said:

I have never felt more alive.

Exactly.

48 minutes ago, Chumbimba said:

My friend was trying to talk me out of approaching. "It's creepy" "They are going to think that you are weird" "blah blah bullshit,"

I had a friend like this. He is no longer my friend. I already have my own mind to sabotage my own self, that's already enough to top it off with a human being telling me what to do and what not to do, and telling me how I am gonna fail. F all of that crap.

I got rid of the death weight. I am glad I did, only thing I regret is not doing it earlier.

 

@Chumbimba Why are you playing basketball during the pandemic?

[Arcangelo]

26 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

That will never work.

100% wrong. Check my pick up diary. Although when it worked she was giving me choosing signals so that's probably why it worked.

Never say never

 

 

Arc

[Chumbimba]

6 minutes ago, Arcangelo said:

 

 

@Chumbimba Why are you playing basketball during the pandemic?

Ball is life 

[JosephKnecht]

1 hour ago, Chumbimba said:

Wow, I was destroyed on the inside. Felt like I was going to die.

Keep practicing until the girls' acceptance or rejection of you has absolutely no effect on you. 

You must become grounded in your own self-worth. You must have confidence in yourself. 

Girls can smell insecurities from a mile away. They know a guy who is doing this for the first time and a guy who has done it many times before.

As Leo said, you should not go straight for the number. You have to build rapport first. The girl has to feel your presence and connect with you before she feels comfortable giving you her number. 

Keep practicing. Practice makes perfect. 

[Rilles]

1 hour ago, Chumbimba said:

First cold approach. I GOT BLOWN THE FUCK OUT LAST NIGHT!  I mean I wanted to jump off a building after it happened. After my friend and I played basketball yesterday we saw 2 girls. when we went to 711 they were there too. My friend was trying to talk me out of approaching. "It's creepy" "They are going to think that you are weird" "blah blah bullshit," I said fuck it I will never get better if I don't try

approached one of the girls and said

ME: "Hey I saw you and I think you're cute can I have your number". 

HER: (didn't even look me in the eye) NO. 

Her Friend: *Laughing

Wow, I was destroyed on the inside. Felt like I was going to die. Strangely though I have never felt more alive. It humbled me and made me realize how bad I really am with girls lol even though I tricked myself into having it figured out. My friend shat on me for approaching but ATLEAST I DID IT !! 

I have a lot to learn but I ready to get better with girls after 23 years of avoidance  

 

Holy shit! Dude, youre ballsy! Inspiring! Dont beat yourself up, that takes alot of courage. 

[Display_Name]

Good job. You hit the fuck-it point, transcended social resistance, and came out better.

long journey ahead but it's so rewarding.

repeat, learn, implement and improve from every approach. pull your first girl. then pull more girls until you're happy with your ability and experiences, and reach social uninhibition and fearless self expression.

 

 

then get back to enlightenment

Edited July 28, 2020 by Display_Name

[Kalki Avatar]

@Chumbimba Lmao

This is exactly what ppl dont understand about pickup. They teach you the knowledge but dont explain all the hidden fundamentals of it. And all the misinterpretations it brings depending on the context. Without truth and contemplation is impossible to understand why it works and why it doesnt. Thats why I made a post called pickup is good crap. 

You violated the first rule. Which was self Honesty of your feelings. Your friend used the relativity of words to convince you of something not real in you. Words are tricky empty spells. Thats why promises tend to be broken so much. 

What ever you feel, she will feel... 

By not feeling completely aligned, I mean you were not mentally prepared neither in the mood. It was just a forced compulsion. You had a thought, but didnt feel completely into it. There was no full aligment. Emotions take a while to follow thoughts. The conviction did not came from you. Your friend made you without your complete consentment. Sadhguru explained this process. You were half-ass into it. Thats why I never do pickup with friends. You will get Fun, but it will have anxiety, pressure and little results. Unless ofc, he is an experienced wing. 

Only do pickup if you feel into it. If not it wont work. It doesnt matter how good you look, how rich you appear, strong, etc. If you have all those, she will give you a chance to see who you are and then find out you are just trying in a forceful needy way to get something out. 

When in fact, lets say you felt like socializing, just passed next to them and made funny comment out of something that its not her. Without even thinking of pickup or having expectations. After that comment a random conversation arises and lastly it just seems you both want to have each others number. But, in those few mins, she read aloooot of you, through your energy, personality and authenticity (Honesty). Thats how pickup should look in an unknowing way. Conscious calculative planned pickups just destroys more than producing. 

Say, you stop reading and investing in pickup for a few months. You just recenter into your aloneness, completely self sufficient, happy and relaxed. And casually talked to a girl by being in the right mood without expectations. That would build your karma and self-fullfiling prophecy in a positive manner much much faster and better way than by going crazy chasing girls everyday. Reading about them, faping on them, seeing pictures, etc. There would not be any bad karma on you about women and you wouldn't even need pickup at all. Cuz pickup can create bad karma aswell. You go out alot and fail alot without proper progress, it will destroy your subconscious feed back and make you fall inside a bad karma wheel of women, that you wont know how to get out. 

Edited July 28, 2020 by Kalki Avatar

[dharm4]

3 hours ago, Chumbimba said:

 Felt like I was going to die.

Some part of your ego did actually die. This is good. It is freeing not to be a prisoner of yourself.

Edited July 28, 2020 by dharm4

[Leo Gura]

2 hours ago, Zak said:

Dont ask for her number right of the bat. That's too direct. It's like telling her, "put your number down and will hook up tonight".

It's like opening with, "Hey, let's fuck."

[Zak]

1 minute ago, Leo Gura said:

It's like opening with, "Hey, let's fuck."

Which never works, even on a hooker.

[Leo Gura]

2 hours ago, Chumbimba said:

@Leo Gura I see why I was so afraid of talking to girls though because that shit hurt

 If you examine it more closely, actually it didn't hurt. She said no and you were not hurt at all. It was no big deal.

Be careful with how your mind exaggerates things and paints all sorts of self-biased narratives.

2 hours ago, Arcangelo said:

100% wrong. Check my pick up diary. Although when it worked she was giving me choosing signals so that's probably why it worked.

Never say never

You should distinguish between good game vs luck.

It is terrible game to ask for a number so soon. That doesn't mean it will never work. Anything can work if you try it enough times. But the point is to become natural and charming in your interactions with women.

Going up to a woman and immediately asking for her number is just downright creepy. This is the kind of move that gives pickup a bad name.

Learn to be social so that dating and sex flows from it naturally. Then people won't think of you as a creeper.

[Zak]

2 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

that gives pickup a bad name

Learn to be social so that dating and sex flows from it naturally.

Pick up almost ruined my life tbh. I am lucky enough to immediately avoid all it's non-sense creepy/sociopathic and uncompassionate behavior. God... pick up (unconscious pick up) can damage peoples' lives.

Guys careful!