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Zec

Psychotherapy

7 posts in this topic

How do you find a good psychotherapist? 

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what's most important is that it is a person you feel you can trust and comfortable opening up to and you feel understands you. besides that contact a bunch and be proactive with your questions you ask them. feel them out. you probably know yourself to some extent so feel out what feels right to you in one. 

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@Zec Try to look for online reviews or ask people who visit one. Ask your general practitioner.

But until you visit one, I guess it is hard to tell.

Also what is good therapy for someone don't have to be good for someone else. Could be about personal taste, since threre is a lot of psychoterapeutic techniques - gestalt, psychoanalysis, cognitive behavioral just to name few.

Do you have a particular problem?

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A good therapist:

1) Does not give too many blunt truths to you

2) You feel like he/she truly listens to you, so does not fake empathy

3) Doesnt speak too much. But when he does open his mouth, you knwo that something worthwhile will be said. It may be a remark, or a question. 

5) is willing to change his opinion about something. Some shitty therapists are arrogant. if they say something, They expect for you to believe it as if it were handed by God.

4) you leave the consultation feeling less anxious, and with at least one insight. 

5) does not rush your progress. He instead helps you to slow down your pace

6) you don’t feel as if you need to justify yourself all the time for him.

7) you look forward to going there 

8) you feel some sort of progress maximum by 2 months


one day this will all be memories

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For me the most important aspects are: 

1) The therapist is honest: no lies, no manipulation

2) he/she's open-minded and not judgemental. Doesn't impose his worldview on you

3) he/she doesn't put on a mask of "I'm the expert and I know what you should do". No arrogance. 

4) You feel like you can talk about any subject/feeling with him/her. This can be tricky because you may actually have a great therapist but feel like he/she is going to judge you because of your own history. It's important to tell when it's your own history that isn't allowing you to tell your truth. 

5) he/she takes responsibility for mistakes and is OK with not knowing everything

6) you feel progressively more comfortable with him/her

7) you start feeling better during and in-between your sessions

8) personally, I like therapists that have a sense of humor and who aren't uptight. But some people like therapists who are more like a parental figure to them. 

 

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#1 mistake is to look for how a therapist is or should be. The main thing is the therapeutic relationship. All else is secondary even though it is helpful to look for approaches you also resonate with.

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