Aquarius

i'm having an existential crisis

22 posts in this topic

I don't even know what the basis of this crisis is. I just simply questioned all my beliefs and let go of my core beliefs or beliefs that didn't seem true to me, or seemed too shallow. I stopped believing in horoscopes, magick, the paranormal, even religion (cause I had some Christian stuff going on too..). I questioned everything and now I feel lost. Back then it was fun to study astrology or to learn about magick, read books about magick and magickal practices. 

The thing is, there's a big confusion in my head on where to go down, where my path leads me now that I let go of all those beliefs. I'm not saying paranormal cannot be real, I'm just saying everything can be real and I don't know what is most real. Because I see these young people talking about horoscopes and it makes me wonder.. what would the elders say, who were ancient secret keepers.? Isn't it all just a sham, a meaningless thing or a trend? The modern world seems to be full of trash. But yet, so many people are very creative and I love seeing their work on videos. 

I also feel my Christian upbringing fucked my head up quite a bit. That religion seems innocent, but it is full of dogma. Sorry to any christian believers here to say this, but I cannot make a real move in the real world of the 21st century when I'm in my christian mindset. Cannot make a move without being fearful that im being punished or something like that. I understand old ages needed that system, and there was a lot to learn from it, still is, but it just ruins my life. And it's really deeply seated in my subconscious, the christian thinking. I'm gonna have to question that too.

With cards and horoscopes, I feel like they aren't always true. Sometimes I read something that is like 100% accurate and I wonder how, other times I am thinking such things can be true for everyone not just 1 zodiac. I was really happy when I made readings for people based on horoscope. But now im depressed because i dont really believe in it. 

I don't know what I believe in. Probably nothing. I'm always wondering how Leo keeps such a sharp mind after reading so many things and hearing so many stories from people on the site.  

What should I do? Just study thousands of perspectives? Watch hundreds of thousands of videos until I find a kernel of truth? Stay away from falling into one belief, just study people skeptically?

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Hello dear one,

When doubt appears, always let go and let god. At moments of doubt when we truly feel helpless, that is when surrender is simple, you remove all expectations from yourself, forgive the doubt for appearing, and simply let life unfold as it is unfolding, do not resist it and it'll dissolve naturallyThat time in which you doubt yourself, be forgiving but understand you are not the doubt. The doubt is trying to attack you and make you feel worse about yourself, it makes you feel almost hopeless. That is not true, and you can simply put no expectations on yourself whatsoever in this moment, and let the doubt be, knowing full well you have faith that you are the loving source of the universe. Doubt may appear but it will not shake you, the thought can be lost in its head but I know I am not that which is lost, I am that in which it all appears. When the ego knows it is in danger and is bound to disappear, it does its most to bring you back into being a person, instead of presence, but there is nothing that can stop you. You are that higher force, and it is not going to abandon you, because you are it. You have no choice but to ascend. It truly is beyond whatever you think, Jesus will save that soul of yours. I recommend you reading some of my other posts about the truth.

These are thoughts that have been appearing in the vast consciousness that you are, but it is not yourself and it is not true. Thoughts, emotions and sensations all appear within you. You are the vessel, not the content. You are the sky, they are the clouds. God is inevitably within you, you are one with god whether you want it to not. The only thing that can block that clear seeing is believing the thoughts and the content appearing within you.

You must realize that this is merely a thought, and that thought has no meaning, no substance and no power, the only reason it appears to be true is because you are giving it the power of your belief. Whatever you believe will appear true, so you must understand this and not give away your power to any content that appears within you. Instead of believing in all the content, believe in the consciousness in which they appear.

The content which appears within yourself is not consistent, not reliable, it changes all the time, you can't trust it. You can't trust the mind, you can't trust thoughts, emotions and sensations. The only thing you can truly trust is yourself, consciousness for it is the only ever-present thing in life. You must see this and understand there is no other place to put your faith in. Do not waste your time believing thoughts about you being confused, do not take them as truth.

That which does not feel aligned is not yourself. You are ever-presently aligned, you can't not be aligned. There is nothing to be aligned with. You are life and the witness of life, you are inevitably aligned, there is nothing you can do to disturb or disrupt the alignment.

That feeling which appears within the consciousness that you are, is merely a feeling. Like thoughts, feelings and sensations all appear within the consciousness that you are. You are not that feeling, and you are not the content of the feeling, the feeling merely is being perceived within you. Anything that is perceived within you, is not you, for you are that empty space and openness that enables all experience to appear, including the world, thoughts, emotions, sensations, imagination etc. These all appear within you. You are not any of it, you are that absolute emptiness that allows everything to appear.

If there is a feeling that you are not aligned, you must simply realize that you are not that feeling, and that feeling says nothing about you or about alignment. It is literally just a feeling.

Feelings by themselves don't mean anything at all, they have no substance, they are empty of meaning, it is only when you believe these feelings that they gain power and then they can feel "true", but if you simply don't believe it and see it for what it is, merely a feeling appearing within the vastness of yourself, it will be observed and dissolve into the emptiness.

It is only when you believe that feeling, that you hold on to it, you try resist it, you don't want it there, it is only then that the feeling truly feels real, otherwise it simply comes and goes. When you believe it to be real, it stays longer than it should. Simply be aware that something is ever-presently perceiving all thoughts, emotions and sensations. And be aware of that which is perceiving. Perceive the perceiver of the feeling. Stay in that peace, rest in that peace, move in that peace, do not listen to merely thoughts, sensations and emotions/feelings that appear within what you are. The only thing you should listen to is silence, for in silence the intuition can be heard, and the intuition will guide you wherever you need to go.

You say "My life is a mess and so is my mind", realize that this is merely a thought appearing within the vast consciousness that you are. You are not that thought, it is not true about you. You are that which perceives all thought, emotion and sensations. You are the highest intelligence of the universe. What happens when we believe these thoughts to be us, is we give them the power of our belief. So you say "I am lost and idk what to do" and if you believe this thought, it will truly appear as if you are lost and don't know what to do.

Luckily the compass of life is always within you, and it is your own heart and your own ever-present truth of being. There is no conceptual knowledge or information that you need, for any information or knowledge appear WITHIN the consciousness that you are. That consciousness that you are is all-knowing and it is able to know anything it needs to know in the present moment. To connect with what you truly are you must be able to realize that there is a presence that is aware of thoughts, otherwise you wouldn't be able to tell me about these thoughts. Now, that presence which is ever-presently perceiving all thought, emotion and sensation, can also be perceived. Perceive it. Perceive that which is ever-presently perceiving.

So most importantly you need to understand that we thoughts appear within you, but alone they are useless, they are just thoughts, they have no power, not meaning and no substance. It is only when you CHOOSE to believe these thoughts, that they appear true. Literally stop believing these thoughts have power and are true and they will dissolve into the empty silence that you are.

To be able to navigate through this life, all you must do is follow the silence of your own heart. Expect nothing at all from life, do not put any expectations on it, do not expect to have different thoughts, do not expect to have different emotions or sensation. Whatever appears within you, let it be, know you are not that, but that in which it is perceived. You are beyond all of it completely. You are the power of life and the witness of life. Truly what you are is indescribable. Know this and follow the path of ego-dissolution, come into the silence of being and move in it, move in that silence, trust it, treasure it, fall in love with it.

You must see your self (who you think you are) as an illusion. Who you think you are is just a thought. You are not depressed and you are not anxious, this is who you THINK you are, and because you believe it, it appears to be real. It is strictly NOT TRUE. You can't be depressed nor anxious, for you are the consciousness in which both depression and anxiety appear, thought, emotion and sensations all appear within the consciousness that you are.

You must be able to realize this, understand this and live this truth, it truly is like that. What you truly are is the perceiver of not only thought, but of the perceiver itself.

You are able to perceive that which perceives. Be in that place for a bit, continue reading this piece

What you truly are, is life itself, and the witness of life. You are not the thought and the story made by the mind, you are not the self-image created by the mind. You are pure presence, you are very light, very pure, very joyful, very loving, very compassionate, very true and authentic, the holy presence of the universe appears before you in this moment. You are the ever-present consciousness, that one element of life that never came and wont go, your truest self.

You are not coming and going thoughts and beliefs, they are like clouds, you are the sky in which they appear.

Consciousness can be conditioned to believe it is the mind, to believe it is doubtful, to believe it is anxious, to believe it is depressed. Consciousness naturally is none of these things, it is only when the consciousness believes in the thoughts that appear, and identifies itself as these thoughts, that reality appears from the perspective of the thought, and that changes how you perceive life. What you must do is understand that is simply thought, thought is perceived, and you are able to perceive the perceiver of thought. What you are has nothing to do with thought, you are way beyond thought, thought is just limitation to what you are.

The mind won't be able to comprehend this but there is one thing that is still listening and reading and completely understanding what I am saying intuitively for it is the holy presence that you are, the pure awareness completely recognizes what I am conveying for it is true within yourself, your heart is truly overflowing with love with any moment, you simply do not look at it, and you look at the distractions the mind is presenting ( all kinds of thoughts that have personal interest in them), these thoughts only continue and make the illusion of being a separate entity from life, feeling alone and abandoned, feeling fearful etc.

The moment you realize that all this appears within you and can be perceived, you will come to a place of seeing very pure, very quiet, very silent, very beautiful, you will be naturally yourself and have a clarity of life.

You won't change, nothing will happen, you'll just shift the perception from thought-based perception to consciousness-based perception. Instead of perceiving thought you will be perceiving the perceiver himself, and just doing that will bring infinite joy, love, peace, compassion and serenity to experience. You mustn't suffer your experiencing, it is only when you rest your attention on the suffering that you suffer. When you rest your attention on your own being, you feel serene, tranquil and beautiful within. Natural well-being.

Thoughts, emotions and sensations are not something that can help or be useful to the highest intelligence, awareness itself. Thoughts, emotions and sensations all appear to that which you are, because you are that which is able to perceive them. They wouldn't exist without you. You are not dependant on them, they simply appear because you are. You are such a vast intelligence that simply everything appears within you, the whole universe itself, including thoughts, emotions and sensations.

You do not need to be attached to any thoughts, emotions and sensations, nor to be attached to anything that appears within that which you are, for they have nothing to do with what you truly are, you are not affected by anything that is, because you are that which is. You just stay that which you are, stay in the silence of your own being. The highest intelligence does not give any importance to any thoughts, emotions and sensations because it is aware of its own silence.

The highest intelligence does not use thoughts, emotions and sensations in order to be. It is completely free from all of these appearing phenomena, it is not the phenomena and not the creator of the phenomena, it is all imagined within that highest intelligence which you are. You are not bound to something that appears within you, you are that greater in which it appears. You must stay in awareness of what you truly are, you must trust in that which you are.

The highest intelligence won't be heard, because it doesn't like to talk. It would rather simply be, be in its own divine being and simply be aware of the vastness. The highest intelligence is easily perceived when one simply turns its attention on one's self. It is easily perceived because it is all that is. Every single thing in existence is that highest intelligence and an expression of the highest intelligence. There is nothing but the highest intelligence alone, pretending to be certain forms, pretending to be thought, pretending to be emotions, sensations, humans, life, death, these are all things it pretends to be, but in truth there is only itself alone. All these are not true, but appearances, when you believe these appearances you lose sight of what is true, the highest intelligence that is ever-present. The highest intelligence is the most obvious thing that is, but it is so subtle that everything misses it. It doesn't take much to realize that presence that you are. Truly you are that.

The highest intelligence does not give in to any doubt, that which gives in to doubt is not the highest intelligence, it is merely thought, and that highest intelligence is aware of that thought. The highest intelligence has no fear of the unknown, since it is itself the unknown, and it is able to know itself through that which is perceived. By realizing all that appears, appears within the highest intelligence, including your own sense of self, even that dissolves into the silence of the highest intelligence that you are.

Every single thought you entertain, every single emotion you entertain, every single sensation you entertain, simply takes you away from the recognition of what you truly are. Do realize that you are simply beyond them, there is nothing to do with them. Both what appears to be "good" and "bad" is the highest intelligence itself. There is no good and no bad, these are just thoughts, the highest intelligence doesn't see good or bad, it only sees itself and is what it is. Be aware of being aware and stay in that silence. That is your only "job". It is effortless to stay in that silence.

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@IAmTheHolySpirit Thanks for the comment. I was expecting to see you reply. How did you write that so fast? Or did you just copy your essay to help me? I appreciate it though. 

You seem to bring more beliefs and more dogma to me. Would you tell the same to a Hindu or a Muslim? That Jesus will come and save them?

I don't even believe in any presence or anything you talk about, I don't believe in anything. And it's frustrating. I gave up certain beliefs I held dear to me because I did so much with horoscope and tarot cards and now they are gone, because I don't trust them. Maybe I need a mentor of some sort, who knows well about cards and all those things. Or else I'm just skeptic about them working the way they intend to work. 

Christianity just makes me very depressed, it takes away all that I love. The same as skepticism, but this time with emotionally manipulating me into leaving everything because only then is God happy. Why can't I both believe in God and find happiness in the tools I use? Most people who use crystal work or healing work are very close to God. Same to people who do darker work. They are also close to God. Christianity is just a path. Exoteric rules are almost the opposite of their esoteric knowledge. Normal, outside folk aren't initiated into the secrets of the church. 

Just some things that were on my mind. Don't take offence please. 

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4 minutes ago, Aquarius said:

@IAmTheHolySpirit Thanks for the comment. I was expecting to see you reply. How did you write that so fast? Or did you just copy your essay to help me? I appreciate it though. 

You seem to bring more beliefs and more dogma to me. Would you tell the same to a Hindu or a Muslim? That Jesus will come and save them?

I don't even believe in any presence or anything you talk about, I don't believe in anything. And it's frustrating. I gave up certain beliefs I held dear to me because I did so much with horoscope and tarot cards and now they are gone, because I don't trust them. Maybe I need a mentor of some sort, who knows well about cards and all those things. Or else I'm just skeptic about them working the way they intend to work. 

Christianity just makes me very depressed, it takes away all that I love. The same as skepticism, but this time with emotionally manipulating me into leaving everything because only then is God happy. Why can't I both believe in God and find happiness in the tools I use? Most people who use crystal work or healing work are very close to God. Same to people who do darker work. They are also close to God. Christianity is just a path. Exoteric rules are almost the opposite of their esoteric knowledge. Normal, outside folk aren't initiated into the secrets of the church. 

Just some things that were on my mind. Don't take offence please. 

This comment is ideal for existential crisis because existential crisis appears when you are believing the confusion, you believe there is a crisis. Existential crisis is actually just a thought. It doesn't exist. 

You are the one who is bringing beliefs and dogma into stuff. That is why you see beliefs and dogma everywhere you go. I don't even notice beliefs or dogma, because I couldn't give a fuck about this nonsense. 

This post isn't about jesus, it is not about religion, it is about what you truly are. I recommend reading it till the end, if you read everything and all you got to say after that is "would you say the same to a hindu"? you are either trolling or you simply didn't read.

Don't comment with your delusions before reading my comment. It might appear "harsh" to you, but all the vitamins and spiritual juice is in the text, but you must read it if you want clarity. You can't continue and perpetuate your nonsense and suffering, unless ofcourse, you want to stay suffering. I am inviting you to freedom, will you take my hand or will you insist on your mind-imagined problems? 

About your comment on the other thread; Mind your own business.

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@IAmTheHolySpirit Yes, I might have delusions as of now. And I'm trying to find my way out of delusion and being lost. Mostly I'm lost because I'm young. I actually felt you didn't read my messages. 

I didn't say the message you copy-pasted to me was bad or anything, but it didn't really have anything to do with it. IT wasn't the solution to my problem. I would've appreciated a written text from you actually acknowledging me and my problems. Are you saying my problems are an illusion? So I should just stop believing I'm lost, then I'm found?

The guidelines are against spam or stuff like that. I just recommended it you don't do it further because you can get kicked out. It was a friendly advice yet you take it as an attack. You can do as you wish, I don't have anything with you or against you. 

And if I disagree with something you wrote then I'm a troll? I read it through in a fast-paced manner and it had nothing that helped me. I'm sorry. I would've appreciated more empathy, sympathy than just you copying a pre-written text.

Edited by Aquarius

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Just now, Aquarius said:

@IAmTheHolySpirit Yes, I might have delusions as of now. And I'm trying to find my way out of delusion and being lost. Mostly I'm lost because I'm young. I actually felt you didn't read my messages. 

I didn't say the message you copy-pasted to me was bad or anything, but it didn't really have anything to do with it. IT wasn't the solution to my problem. I would've appreciated a written text for you actually acknowledging me and my problems. Are you saying my problems are an illusion? So I should just stop believing I'm lost, then I'm found?

The guidelines are against spam or stuff like that. I just recommended it you don't do it further because you can get kicked out. It was a friendly advice yet you take it as an attack. You can do as you wish, I don't have anything with you or against you. 

And if I disagree with something you wrote then I'm a troll? I read it through in a fast-paced manner and it had nothing that helped me. I'm sorry. I would've appreciated more empathy, sympathy than just you copying a pre-written text.

Whatever, you choose to suffer and talk about all this nonsense and personal stuff instead of simply following my advice. It might take a bit more suffering for you until you are ready to actually take in the wisdom. Enjoy being delusional, hopefully it is in the universes plan to wake you up. Or not, I don't give a fuck.

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47 minutes ago, IAmTheHolySpirit said:

Hello dear one,

When doubt appears, always let go and let god. At moments of doubt when we truly feel helpless, that is when surrender is simple, you remove all expectations from yourself, forgive the doubt for appearing, and simply let life unfold as it is unfolding, do not resist it and it'll dissolve naturallyThat time in which you doubt yourself, be forgiving but understand you are not the doubt. The doubt is trying to attack you and make you feel worse about yourself, it makes you feel almost hopeless. That is not true, and you can simply put no expectations on yourself whatsoever in this moment, and let the doubt be, knowing full well you have faith that you are the loving source of the universe. Doubt may appear but it will not shake you, the thought can be lost in its head but I know I am not that which is lost, I am that in which it all appears. When the ego knows it is in danger and is bound to disappear, it does its most to bring you back into being a person, instead of presence, but there is nothing that can stop you. You are that higher force, and it is not going to abandon you, because you are it. You have no choice but to ascend. It truly is beyond whatever you think, Jesus will save that soul of yours. I recommend you reading some of my other posts about the truth.

@IAmTheHolySpirit I'm sorry dude, I might have been a bit less understanding you did deserve. I'm trying to read it in a slower manner. It really does help, I was skeptic because you wrote the comment so fast. I actually feel honored that you wrote this first message to me today. Sorry to attack you on the other post, I meant no harm. Didn't expect you will be angry. 

So this first part of your message says, I am the source of Love. Yes, it's easier to let go of everything right now that I'm not really holding to anything.

You say I am that higher force. Am I God? Or what is meant here?

Edited by Aquarius

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Just now, Aquarius said:

@IAmTheHolySpirit I'm sorry dude, I might have been a bit less understanding you did deserve. I'm trying to read it in a slower manner. It really does help, I was skeptic because you wrote the comment so fast. I actually feel honored that you wrote this first message to me today. Sorry to attack you on the other post, I meant no harm. Didn't expect you will be angry. 

So this first part of your message says, I am the source of Love. Yes, it's easier to let go of everything right now that I'm not really holding to anything.

You say I am that higher force. Am I God? Or what is meant here?

Don't try to understand it for a bit, just read through it till the end. I am  here for any questions after that. Trust me love.

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@IAmTheHolySpirit I found that silence to be non-nothing in one of my meditation sessions. Everything disappeared, even ego and there is was, pure emptiness and silence. I became aware of it the first time in my life. It was about a month ago. I was praying a lot back then, for other people and people in general including me. And I was shown that emptiness. 

I kept getting confused by good and bad. I never believed in good or bad, but deep inside in my subconscious I had it buried. It came up and I had to work through it. Like most traumas that come up.

Beautiful read, thank you. Just what I needed. I don't think I have any questions, other than wanting to discuss it more deeply maybe with you. <3 

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1 minute ago, Aquarius said:
 
 
 
 
2
1 minute ago, Aquarius said:

@IAmTheHolySpirit I found that silence to be non-nothing in one of my meditation sessions. Everything disappeared, even ego and there is was, pure emptiness and silence. I became aware of it the first time in my life. It was about a month ago. I was praying a lot back then, for other people and people in general including me. And I was shown that emptiness. 

I kept getting confused by good and bad. I never believed in good or bad, but deep inside in my subconscious I had it buried. It came up and I had to work through it. Like most traumas that come up.

Beautiful read, thank you. Just what I needed. I don't think I have any questions, other than wanting to discuss it more deeply maybe with you. <3 

Quote

Just what I needed.

The universe is so infinitely kind, isn't it?

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2 minutes ago, IAmTheHolySpirit said:

The universe is so infinitely kind, isn't it?

@IAmTheHolySpirit Yes. :) Thank you.

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@IAmTheHolySpirit I'm wondering. If thoughts arise anyway, and feelings too, why not choose the best ones to fill my mind? Or just let go of all the delusion and create a good life with the best tools?

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3 minutes ago, Aquarius said:

@IAmTheHolySpirit I'm wondering. If thoughts arise anyway, and feelings too, why not choose the best ones to fill my mind? Or just let go of all the delusion and create a good life with the best tools?

First of all, these are thoughts also. The mind is now trying to lure you into unconsciousness again; "What if I do this?", this is already a scam of the mind. In a few moments of following this train of thought you will be having an existential crisis again :D

Just leave it. Drop it. Don't try to do anything. Don't follow ANY thought. You don't need to fill your mind, you don't need anything at all, just be aware of awareness itself. You don't need to create a "good life", once you are aware of being aware, you are automatically aligned with the highest plan of the father himself, god, for you. Stay in alignment with god, and don't worry about all this kind of nonsense from the mind. The mind can't offer you anything that the universe already has set up for you. Just relax, be grateful for the silence, and stay with it. That is your ONLY job. Anything else is a distraction.

I recommend watching Moojiji on youtube, he can help you infinitely. Moojiji is your truest self, the highest self, embodied. So enjoy loving mooji, because mooji is yourself.

Edited by IAmTheHolySpirit

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4 minutes ago, IAmTheHolySpirit said:

First of all, these are thoughts also. The mind is now trying to lure you into unconsciousness again; "What if I do this?", this is already a scam of the mind. In a few moments of following this train of thought you will be having an existential crisis again :D

Just leave it. Drop it. Don't try to do anything. Don't follow ANY thought. You don't need to fill your mind, you don't need anything at all, just be aware of awareness itself. You don't need to create a "good life", once you are aware of being aware, you are automatically aligned with the highest plan of the father himself, god, for you. Stay in alignment with god, and don't worry about all this kind of nonsense from the mind. The mind can't offer you anything that the universe already has set up for you. Just relax, be grateful for the silence, and stay with it. That is your ONLY job. Anything else is a distraction.

I recommend watching Moojiji on youtube, he can help you infinitely. Moojiji is your truest self, the highest self, embodied. So enjoy loving mooji, because mooji is yourself.

Ohh I see.. right. I will try. :) 

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5 hours ago, Aquarius said:

Because I see these young people talking about horoscopes and it makes me wonder..

Astrology is a valid thing, do not give up on it...

Sometimes I can talk to a new person and tell their zodiac sign. Just let it go for a while, switch your attention. 

5 hours ago, Aquarius said:

I wonder how, other times I am thinking such things can be true for everyone not just 1 zodiac.

Here is a wonderful source, do not just read about sun sign, read the whole natal chart

https://astro.cafeastrology.com/natal.php

Sorry for my poor response....


"All that we know is limited, something we don't - is infinite"

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May seem simple but this helped me out beyond words and may have saved my life.

Let go of the " NEED TO KNOW " .

( Not saying don't ask questions, not reading books, etc )

But let go of the CLINGINESS, ATTACHMENT to an anwser like you are used to getting before. One-dimensional, explicit, non-paradoxical.


Acept NOT KNOWING.

There is a deep state of peace and inner silence that you get into when you embrace NOT KNOWING as a valid state of being.

What am I? Why does life exist? What's the point of life? what is the fundation of existance ??
So many open threads. So many possibilities. So many unknown factors. When you start thinking and thinking and don't get to any convicing anwsers, you will feel pain, confusion and worse.

 

But then it hits you. 

OOH!!!

I don't KNOW!! I DONT KNOW! AND I NEVER KNEW!! I was just hiding in unconscious uninquired assumptions of reallity, of myself and worldview paradigms.

And it was giving you , my favorite word of all time : Pseudo-safety. The illusion of safety.

And it's okay!!

Woah, I'm so astonished. I'm so amazed. I have no words.

Reallity is so misterious!! What the hell? How didin't I see this before?!!
Reallity seems magical. What the f^ck. HOW IS ANYTHING POSSIBLE?

And that's the place you want to stay in. Not knowing is not bad. It's not stupid. It's not demeaning as our culture pushes on us .

Not knowing is a superior state of being. Of openness for hypothesis. Of oppenness for direct, personal experimentation.

You can ultimately  only ground yourself in Actuallity, direct experience. And that's where you get deeper and deeper into spirituallity.

You may want to read The book of Not Knowing by Peter Ralston.

Good luck!

 


🗣️🗯️  personal dev Log Lyfe Journal 🗿🎭 ~ Raw , Emotional, Unfiltered

 

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Hi aquarius. You know it takes time to reconstruct your mind when you start questioning unexamined  beliefs  deep in your mind. I was raised in muslim family and i know everything about islam. It took me 4 years of confusions questioning Hesitations and not knowing untill I'm out of that beast. It's hard work.but i recommend examining your beliefs one by one. Start with big ones. The rest are easy But if you keep looking for the truth and trust the journey you will make it everything will click at the end. And yes some mooji video somehow helped me 

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5 hours ago, Aquarius said:

thoughts arise anyway, choosing the best ones to fill my mind = just letting go of all the delusion the focus on what doesn’t feel good to me, and creatIng a good the life I really want to, with the best tools.

I believe what you are on the brink of discovering is that all experience is relative to each person, and thought only comes in the one flavor, relative.  You might imagine someone coming to earth from another planet. They’d need a suit and a spaceship of some sort to get here, to get into this place. But then they could leave that ship, and put down that suit, and explore the world, and more & more discover what they love, and who they really are. Those two tend to become one. 

If you don’t quite know what it is you love most yet, or what you want to do...consider making a dreamboard. Instead of a swirl of relativity ‘in your head’, your unique interests and desires are in front of you on the board. I can’t possibly overemphasize the difference the vantage point can make in clarity and life. I hope you can find some peace and comfort perhaps, in just acknowledging to yourself, ‘this is a stage, it’s natural, this is the part where I take off the suit, and see who am, and what want to do in this place’. You are not relative to you, clearly, imo, you came to create in your creation. And btw, your sincerity smells like roses. It’s refreshingly beautiful. Thanks for that. Godspeed. 


MEDITATIONS TOOLS  ActualityOfBeing.com  GUIDANCE SESSIONS

NONDUALITY LOA  My Youtube Channel  THE TRUE NATURE

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I'm just writing to point smth out. There's nothing wrong with having an existential crisis. 

On the contrary, it might be just what you need. This might be your awakening. Who knows?

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22 hours ago, Galyna said:

Astrology is a valid thing, do not give up on it...

Sometimes I can talk to a new person and tell their zodiac sign. Just let it go for a while, switch your attention. 

Here is a wonderful source, do not just read about sun sign, read the whole natal chart

https://astro.cafeastrology.com/natal.php

Sorry for my poor response....

I do that too. I just look at someone and know their zodiac. Don't need to know them deeply. Even from photos I can tell.

And I can tell other placements too. Like Moon or ASC. @Galyna

21 hours ago, mmKay said:

May seem simple but this helped me out beyond words and may have saved my life.

Let go of the " NEED TO KNOW " .

( Not saying don't ask questions, not reading books, etc )

But let go of the CLINGINESS, ATTACHMENT to an anwser like you are used to getting before. One-dimensional, explicit, non-paradoxical.


Acept NOT KNOWING.

There is a deep state of peace and inner silence that you get into when you embrace NOT KNOWING as a valid state of being.

What am I? Why does life exist? What's the point of life? what is the fundation of existance ??
So many open threads. So many possibilities. So many unknown factors. When you start thinking and thinking and don't get to any convicing anwsers, you will feel pain, confusion and worse.

 

But then it hits you. 

OOH!!!

I don't KNOW!! I DONT KNOW! AND I NEVER KNEW!! I was just hiding in unconscious uninquired assumptions of reallity, of myself and worldview paradigms.

And it was giving you , my favorite word of all time : Pseudo-safety. The illusion of safety.

And it's okay!!

Woah, I'm so astonished. I'm so amazed. I have no words.

Reallity is so misterious!! What the hell? How didin't I see this before?!!
Reallity seems magical. What the f^ck. HOW IS ANYTHING POSSIBLE?

And that's the place you want to stay in. Not knowing is not bad. It's not stupid. It's not demeaning as our culture pushes on us .

Not knowing is a superior state of being. Of openness for hypothesis. Of oppenness for direct, personal experimentation.

You can ultimately  only ground yourself in Actuallity, direct experience. And that's where you get deeper and deeper into spirituallity.

You may want to read The book of Not Knowing by Peter Ralston.

Good luck!

 

It's indeed powerful to be in that place. I think that's the place I'm finding myself in. But for me it's scary. I'll just inuire deeper..@mmKay

 

@Soullee

21 hours ago, Soullee said:

Hi aquarius. You know it takes time to reconstruct your mind when you start questioning unexamined  beliefs  deep in your mind. I was raised in muslim family and i know everything about islam. It took me 4 years of confusions questioning Hesitations and not knowing untill I'm out of that beast. It's hard work.but i recommend examining your beliefs one by one. Start with big ones. The rest are easy But if you keep looking for the truth and trust the journey you will make it everything will click at the end. And yes some mooji video somehow helped me 

Yes, I might need to read hundreds of books.

21 hours ago, Nahm said:

I believe what you are on the brink of discovering is that all experience is relative to each person, and thought only comes in the one flavor, relative.  You might imagine someone coming to earth from another planet. They’d need a suit and a spaceship of some sort to get here, to get into this place. But then they could leave that ship, and put down that suit, and explore the world, and more & more discover what they love, and who they really are. Those two tend to become one. 

If you don’t quite know what it is you love most yet, or what you want to do...consider making a dreamboard. Instead of a swirl of relativity ‘in your head’, your unique interests and desires are in front of you on the board. I can’t possibly overemphasize the difference the vantage point can make in clarity and life. I hope you can find some peace and comfort perhaps, in just acknowledging to yourself, ‘this is a stage, it’s natural, this is the part where I take off the suit, and see who am, and what want to do in this place’. You are not relative to you, clearly, imo, you came to create in your creation. And btw, your sincerity smells like roses. It’s refreshingly beautiful. Thanks for that. Godspeed. 

@Nahm Godspeed!

17 hours ago, EnlightenmentBlog said:

I'm just writing to point smth out. There's nothing wrong with having an existential crisis. 

On the contrary, it might be just what you need. This might be your awakening. Who knows?

@EnlightenmentBlog I mean, I can get used to it. :) 

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