Wait for the real one or dating with girls?

[Amit]

22 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

You have also called women on social media as whores for expressing their sexual side, very degrading way of referring to women. 

Really, I don't know that, which platforms you are following me on, and I really don't have a fb.. ?

[Amit]

3 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

Not proud of your mindset at all. It's disturbing. 

@Preety_India  You made me sad by saying this. 

Also I don't want to brag about my own compassion, but yeah I am trying to grow in it for sure. 

 

[Amit]

9 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

Because you don't know shit

Because I never tried to know about shit, seems like you are an expert ?. 

[Preety_India]

 

4 minutes ago, Amit said:

Really, I don't know that, which platforms you are following me on, and I really don't have a fb.. ?

You have tons of hypocrisy in your attitude. I don't need to follow a man like you who sees every opportunity to degrade women and then comes around and says "happy mothers day" 

In fact you are the one who is constantly following me around. I had to block you from messages in order to stop getting them. 

So this is the post where you are trying to show women on social media as looking for money in exchange for sex. 

Try to be positive towards women and stop trying to act like I'm in interested in you. Because I'm not. 

 

 

 

[Amit]

2 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

you are the one who is constantly following me around. I had to block you from messages in order to stop getting them. 

where am I following you in your dreams? when did I even message you, in my previous life? 

 

[Amit]

8 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

Try to be positive towards women

You should try to be positive towards me and not act like my teacher. enough of the projection. 

[Amit]

9 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

So this is the post where you are trying to show women on social media as looking for money in exchange for sex. 

Yeah, what's wrong in that, it happens. What's wrong in warning people about it. It's empathy. 

[Preety_India]

 

5 minutes ago, Amit said:

where am I following you in your dreams? when did I even message you, in my previous life? 

 

You got issues to work on. Learn compassion. Stop degrading women. Grow out of your toxic views on women.  Peace out. ?????

 

 

 

 

[Amit]

2 minutes ago, Preety_India said:

You got issues to work on. Learn compassion. Stop degrading women. Grow out of your toxic views on women.

Same to you, grow out of toxic views on me. 

[Preety_India]

 

Nothing funny about this.  

 

That's a cringe thing to say. I don't get along with men who disrespect women. 

 

 

(you guys loved the popcorn I guess) 

Edited May 15, 2020 by Preety_India

[28 cm unbuffed]

@Preety_India

I read what you wrote about how you were in an abusive relationship. Are you aware of the fact, that you were this narcissist yourself and he was just "part of you", that needed healing? That's how it works, you always attract yourself. Just saying that, so that you know, that if you still have this inside of you, this shadow, it will come back into your life over and over again. 

I think that's basically what @Amit was trying to tell you, it's victim mindset in a nutshell. "It's not me, it's them, who were abusive and fucked up and they treated me wrong". The catch is, that there is no other, you are your consciousness, you can't run from yourself, that's what extreme ownership of your life really means. 

Accept that it was all you, you wanted this suffering, you wanted to be abused and you chose it for yourself, it sounds harsh and I am not here do judge - that's just reality. It's not easy to unwire that shit, as it can be deep in your subconscious, but it's always your responsibility to get rid of any negativity and toxic people from your life.

Feel free to PM me if you'll need any advice on that, I'm on a stage of my life, where I am struggling with a similar issue right now.

Edited May 15, 2020 by 28 cm unbuffed

[Preety_India]

 

@28 cm unbuffed

I'm an opposite of a narcissist. It's the opposites who attract. He got attracted to me because he saw me as a vulnerable non judgemental person. I was very quick at forgiving. That was an advantage to him. He was very manipulative and charming. It was very easy to fall for his charm..

We always attract people who we think we will derive some value from. Because we think they complement us in some way. They will complete our incompleteness. A shy person attracts a confident person. A timid person attracts a strong person. A dominant attracts the sub.. This is the nature of sexual life. Sexual attraction works on opposite attractions of qualities. 

He was a like Dom narcissist and I was like a sub feminine. I was attracted to his dominating personality because I wanted someone to dominate me because I was submissive myself. Another submissive person cannot create an attraction in me. He was good in the bed. Dominant. But his dominance went too far and got abusive and toxic.. 

Sadly relationships are more revolved around sexual attraction and less around behavior traits. This is the nature of life. It's important to be careful to not only have the right dose of sexual chemistry but also the right mental frequency where they both get along in terms of behavior requirement, like equal respect to each other, in our case, I respected him but he didn't respect me and broke my boundaries, as a result I had to cut off with him

But it's never too late. I'm happy in my new relationship now. He is not that dominating, the sexual chemistry is not as strong but it can grow over time, the best part is that we respect each other equally so I don't need to fight for respect. 

 

 

[Preety_India]

 

Just now, Etherial Cat said:

@Preety_India

Feminity isn't submission, it's receptivity as far as I know.

Makes a big change IMO.

I didn't say femininity is submission. I said I was feminine and submissive. My nature is feminine but I'm generally very submissive in relationships and friendships. Just like people are shy. 

I was describing my nature. 

 

[Preety_India]

1 minute ago, Meta-Man said:

@Preety_India

It was a lighthearted joke, darling.

All of life is a joke. Have a laugh. Have a laugh at yourself sometime. It’s quite healing actually

The original plan was to post ?but I arrived a little late ?

Haha.. ?? Enjoy this ice cream then ??

 

[28 cm unbuffed]

@Preety_India

That doesn't make sense - the more we develop ourselves the worse people we attract to us? Because good attracts evil?

[Preety_India]

 

11 minutes ago, 28 cm unbuffed said:

@Preety_India

That doesn't make sense - the more we develop ourselves the worse people we attract to us? Because good attracts evil?

Good doesn't attract evil. It's ignorance. Most people are ignorant of what sort of relationships they are getting into. We as humans don't have the capacity to predict the future of a relationship. We always carry great hopes in the beginning. But gradually when the relationship takes a dark turn, we don't quickly get out of it because emotionally processing takes time. 

Evil and good are very strong terms. I wouldn't call my ex an evil person. Maybe he was ignorant in his ways not realizing that what he was doing was hurtful and wrong. 

We attract partners based on sexual dynamics of opposite attraction. However like I said, it's important to keep in mind that both partners respect each other. We aren't given a handbook or manual while entering relationships. Most relationships are spontaneous. 

A person who was behaving good today can act strange tomorrow. So there's no point in laying blame. The best strategy here is to show light to each other. When you realize that someone is in a toxic relationship, guide them to be out of it. 

Also when you are going to be in a relationship, try reading a ton of stuff on it, the more information you have, the more you are prepared to know the positives and negatives of a relationship. 

Before my relationship, I didn't even know that the term narcissistic abuse existed. When I was going to break that relationship, someone suggested me that it could be narcissistic abuse. I immediately read about it and saw that all characteristics of the relationship matched narcissistic abuse. Had I known before, I would have made well informed decisions. 

That's how things work. So when educate yourself more and develop yourself, your chances of finding a better partner increases. 

However most people aren't so lucky to have all the resources or the capabilities to learn quickly.

Edited May 15, 2020 by Preety_India

[28 cm unbuffed]

@Preety_India

You're probably an empath, I'm an empath too, I had no good boundaries, so I was attracting narcissists into my life, even my mother was a narcissist. 90% of feelings that I feel are not even mine, I'm a fucking sponge and it kills me. I am always looking for ways to improve myself because I think everything that is happening is somehow my fault aka extreme ownership. I really want to experience life to the fullest, but I spend almost every minute of my time alone, to not get influenced by these energies, and to be honest that is my only way to enjoy myself, people are full of toxicity all around. 

[Amit]

@Meta-Man ?, she can't handle me. 

6 hours ago, Etherial Cat said:

You can shed bad romantic relationships baggages by throwing the trash in other area of your life as well. Some of those principles works as well for work relationship per example, or for the relationship you have with your self.

On point, very well explained, it affects all areas of your life, better to accept, integrate and be free, rather than carry it around. 

 

[Preety_India]

 

36 minutes ago, 28 cm unbuffed said:

@Preety_India

You're probably an empath, I'm an empath too, I had no good boundaries, so I was attracting narcissists into my life, even my mother was a narcissist. 90% of feelings that I feel are not even mine, I'm a fucking sponge and it kills me. I am always looking for ways to improve myself because I think everything that is happening is somehow my fault aka extreme ownership. I really want to experience life to the fullest, but I spend almost every minute of my time alone, to not get influenced by these energies, and to be honest that is my only way to enjoy myself, people are full of toxicity all around. 

You are right about a lot of things in this post. 

 

But this statement is a problem 

"I think everything that is happening is somehow my fault aka extreme ownership." 

This to me sounds more of self blame than ownership. You probably suffer from low self esteem instilled by the narcissistic abuse from your mother. That's why you try to be a perfectionist. You find it hard to believe that you are good enough. Even when I told you that you are handsome, you couldn't believe it. This to me shows that you suffer a melancholic level of  nihilistic self-deprecatory mindset. You constantly feel that you are not worthy or good enough. These feelings are probably inserted into your mind by the narcissistic mother. This happened to me too. 

I doubt if you are a cancer or scorpio or somewhere in between 

But you are definitely in the lower index of the zodiac. 

 

I'm not sure if you are a water sign in the zodiac, but you share a lot of similarities in personality traits with me. Like a twin flame. 

You doubt yourself. You think that you lost something in life when you are only 29. You think that you are not good enough, when you are actually very good. You think that you are not intelligent enough, when you are fairly intelligent than others.

We both had narcissistic mothers who devalued us. There is a small difference though. I'm very positive. I'm like the happier version of you. You are more of the melancholic version of me. 

You're definitely not a shallow person. You have a depth to your personality that few can understand. 

You need to come out of that halo or haze of pessimistic self - defeating. You can do great in life as you have full potential. Don't wait for a relationship or a girl to improve your life, the time is now or never. 

Whether you get a woman or not is secondary, focus only on improving your life one day at a time and gradually you will see a happier version of yourself. 

You're an empath. Use that quality to love yourself just like you would love others. 

 

 

Edited May 15, 2020 by Preety_India

[28 cm unbuffed]

@Preety_India

I am an Aquarius, but (I am not that good at astrology), I have really strong Lion in me (moon sign and I am also Lion ascendant, so, from what I understand, that's how people see me, or how I show myself to people). Aquarius is a part of me that is freaky, bright, looking into the future, outgoing, and brilliant. The lion is this proud, brave, warm, and bold part of me. 

I am really positive and outgoing person. Maybe this forum makes me look like I'm nihilistic etc, but it's just a stage of my life when I'm after dark night of the soul, a spiritual awakening experience, and also changing place of living. Also - I use this forum mainly to deal with my problems and to find solutions to them, that's why my posts are mostly, umm, negative. 

My Twin Flame (or false Twin Flame, I don't know) was a Mary Magdalene, I was taking part in some kind of Christ template where I was a Christ, my Twin Flame was a whore (literally) and my friend betrayed and blocked me, another narcissist, a Juda lol. 

Right now I am following one channel where this woman is talking about Soul Flames, I am more sceptic about it now, I'm just checking her YouTube social posts, but they align with me a lot (energy-wise, she could not just make this stuff out). I am not sure if that is true or not, I am aware, that it might be just a hard case of oneitis. That's why I try not to give too much attention to it, just working on myself and my purpose, so that this neediness could die in me. But that's like the hardest path I could take, but also a wise one I think. It makes me really strong and my personality is becoming really powerful thanks to that, but, as I said, it's not easy to walk this path.