Year After Intense Awakening

[lukej]

Hello everyone. I just graduated from college, started my spiritual/life coaching business (built and designed the website myself), and I am halfway done with an album. 

I wanted to share with you how my life has changed after the really intense awakening experience I had last year. I was meditating (not on any drugs) and I became conscious of my fear of being God/Divinty (or being infinite). I was able to move past that fear and after I did that a brilliant white light overtook me and I found myself again a while later. I could not speak for an hour or so. My mouth just hanged open. Also, little interesting face, I actually orgasmed too which was freaky. I felt like the divine had come down and "screwed me out of existence". Kind of me reminds me of a peak of a mushroom trip. You feel it coming slow and hard and then it kills you and you drown in beauty. My body felt so free and loose. After that meditation become so powerful. Every time I would site down I would die lol. I had to stop for a little bit actually. Now I am back to it and it is fine. 

For a few months after that, I was in such a blissful state. I could see everyone's aura all the time. I had a smile on my face all the time. Until I went through cancer surgery and then a week after that had to finish my last year of school, as well go through radiation. But through all of that, I felt so much love and compassion. I cry every day or every other day tears of thankfulness and I drown in the beauty. It is really so hard to describe. I know on such a deep level all I want is to be in union with God or the divine. 

I want to share this with you. Who I have become has surprised me so much. I think you will too once you explore the power of love. I thought after a while the feeling would go away. But there is still that warm glow with me all the time. 

Now, this didn't just happen to me. I knew about something called Godhead since I was 13 and I have in many ways dedicated my life to finding that. And it was better than I could have ever imagined it be. 

So, please don't give up. Please keep going forward on your path. It is so worth it. The divine loves you more than you could ever imagine. You may not even be able to handle how the divine loves you. 

This is all I have to say. I will be going my own way now. My inner guidance so loud now I can't ignore it. I found what I was looking for and now I spend every day making the connection stronger and find a way to help others reclaim their space in the eternal kingdom of love in all of our heats. 

Also, just for fun, I attached an image that has pics of me from my senior year of high school to senior year of college. I found Actualized.Org late in 2015. I lost 100 lbs, quit smoking (only smoked for a year, my parents did too, so..), got laid (a lot lol),  and had a good time otherwise.

I am just here to share my love and gratitude. I don't get anything more special or profound to say.  Other than you are worth all of the pain and suffering to bring this about in your life. The reality of love is so good that it will make you weep. It will complete your life and you can die happy. 

Thank you!

 

[Recursoinominado]

Seems like you are winning this game, bro, congrats!

Can you tell us a little more about your meditation routine? Books, teachings that helped you on your journey? Tips?

[lukej]

@Recursoinominado

Well, first I would say that there is no game to "win".  The divine will never think of you as a failure, and you have all of the time and space to eventually come to the realization of it. It can feel like life is a game. But it is more like a beautiful dance and or song. You can also think of it as an organic system growing and exploring all paths for the supreme joy of it.

I can't take full credit nor retrace my steps to where I am. It is a very individual process. Before I was diagnosed with cancer I was still fairly aware and had many mystical experiences. But none that never lasted and went as deep. It was as if life gave me two options. Open to the love of God, or spin-off into darkness and madness. So, I chose to take full responsibility for my life and that began once I stopped being the "amature life coach" in my head. I placed my hand my heart every day and for an hour two I would tell myself "I love you" "I am here for you, I will always be here for you". 

I went from subtly hating myself to falling in love with myself. As a gay man, I found that to be so relieving as well. I didn't realize I was running away from so much until that happened. 

Otherwise, I recommend you find teachers and or books that talk about love in this manner. If it comes from love than it has the very high potential of being beneficial. 

Nowadays I don't read books on spirituality or listen to teachers. I sometimes listen to Acutalized.Org when Leo has a new video. It's an old habit, a familiar voice, but really nothing I not heard before. Matt Kahn is one of my favorites too. 

In terms of my meditation routine. Well, I have found if you make it an absolute mandatory thing it loses the joy of it. I don't have a set time. I meditate when I feel like it. Either a few shorts 20 - 30 sessions throughout the day. Or a longer hour-long session. But I also spend time blessing the world and finding things to be grateful for. I am proactive in keeping the love strong in me.  

The divine within you knows what you need to do. Trust yourself more. The more soft and gentle you become the easier your ego will surrender into the love. 

When I look onto the world I don't see evil and nonsensical chaos. I see innocent gods who have forgotten their home (and probably for their own purposes) coming together looking for the love that they are and finding ways to express that and share it. Could you begin to see yourself in such a pure way?

[Verdesbird]

thats good

[James123]

2 hours ago, lukej said:

Hello everyone. I just graduated from college, started my spiritual/life coaching business (built and designed the website myself), and I am halfway done with an album. 

I wanted to share with you how my life has changed after the really intense awakening experience I had last year. I was meditating (not on any drugs) and I became conscious of my fear of being God/Divinty (or being infinite). I was able to move past that fear and after I did that a brilliant white light overtook me and I found myself again a while later. I could not speak for an hour or so. My mouth just hanged open. Also, little interesting face, I actually orgasmed too which was freaky. I felt like the divine had come down and "screwed me out of existence". Kind of me reminds me of a peak of a mushroom trip. You feel it coming slow and hard and then it kills you and you drown in beauty. My body felt so free and loose. After that meditation become so powerful. Every time I would site down I would die lol. I had to stop for a little bit actually. Now I am back to it and it is fine. 

For a few months after that, I was in such a blissful state. I could see everyone's aura all the time. I had a smile on my face all the time. Until I went through cancer surgery and then a week after that had to finish my last year of school, as well go through radiation. But through all of that, I felt so much love and compassion. I cry every day or every other day tears of thankfulness and I drown in the beauty. It is really so hard to describe. I know on such a deep level all I want is to be in union with God or the divine. 

I want to share this with you. Who I have become has surprised me so much. I think you will too once you explore the power of love. I thought after a while the feeling would go away. But there is still that warm glow with me all the time. 

Now, this didn't just happen to me. I knew about something called Godhead since I was 13 and I have in many ways dedicated my life to finding that. And it was better than I could have ever imagined it be. 

So, please don't give up. Please keep going forward on your path. It is so worth it. The divine loves you more than you could ever imagine. You may not even be able to handle how the divine loves you. 

This is all I have to say. I will be going my own way now. My inner guidance so loud now I can't ignore it. I found what I was looking for and now I spend every day making the connection stronger and find a way to help others reclaim their space in the eternal kingdom of love in all of our heats. 

Also, just for fun, I attached an image that has pics of me from my senior year of high school to senior year of college. I found Actualized.Org late in 2015. I lost 100 lbs, quit smoking (only smoked for a year, my parents did too, so..), got laid (a lot lol),  and had a good time otherwise.

I am just here to share my love and gratitude. I don't get anything more special or profound to say.  Other than you are worth all of the pain and suffering to bring this about in your life. The reality of love is so good that it will make you weep. It will complete your life and you can die happy. 

Thank you!

 

Good for you brother. Wish you to the best.

[Kingston]

@lukej Beautiful !!!!!!!!

Do you consider yourself enlightened now?

 

[Freakyboo]

Wow, your story really touched my heart.  You have been through so much and come out the other side strong and beautiful - a source of light to the world. 

Thank you.